Author Topic: Would you let a co-worker pay for your lunch?  (Read 4669 times)

SomedayStache

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Would you let a co-worker pay for your lunch?
« on: June 22, 2015, 11:37:47 AM »
I'm feeling a bit awkward and looking for What Would a Mustachian (and decent person) do anwers.

There's a smallish group of co-workers that have a weekly lunch out of the office.  We've been going for years.

This month my family blew through our monthly  restaurant budget in the first 1.5 weeks of the month (our kitchen sink backed up, visitors, plus general laziness are good excuses, right??)  I skipped out on last week's lunch and just sent a reply for this weeks invitation with the true excuse that I'm out of restaurant money.

My coworker replied that they'd be glad of my company if she'd let me pay for her.  Now I'm in the awkward position of refusing this generous offer or the potentially even more awkward position of accepting and letting her pay for me.  I really am out of restaurant money - but we also have $14k in our checking account, so its not like I actually need lunch money. 

Insanity

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Re: Would you let a co-worker pay for your lunch?
« Reply #1 on: June 22, 2015, 11:56:05 AM »
Not in that situation.  I have in others. 


4alpacas

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Re: Would you let a co-worker pay for your lunch?
« Reply #2 on: June 22, 2015, 11:58:29 AM »
Nope. 

I also don't mention my budget to my coworkers (or going over my budget).  I would just mention the awesome lunch I packed.  Or going to the gym during lunch. 

Random Hangers

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Re: Would you let a co-worker pay for your lunch?
« Reply #3 on: June 22, 2015, 12:02:07 PM »
I would say no for several reasons.

First, I'd feel obligated to repay the coworker, which would then eat into next week/month's budget. No bueno (especially because who knows where lunch would be and what the co-worker would want to order; it could end up accidentally coming out unfairly balanced). I also think it's a good lesson for others to occasionally hear, "No, it's not in my budget," which is different from, "I don't have the money for it" because it goes to show that not everyone needs to be instantly gratified, y'know?

Was so nice of the co-worker to offer though! I'd just say, "Thanks, not this time, but see you next week!"

catccc

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Re: Would you let a co-worker pay for your lunch?
« Reply #4 on: June 22, 2015, 12:02:48 PM »
I wouldn't.

Since you used the true excuse, I'd clarify that you have plenty of other money, but you like to stick to a strict budget as an exercise in willpower and taking her up on that would kind of ruin the game of budgeting for you.  So thank her for her offer and tell her you'll catch them next month.

I'm a red panda

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Re: Would you let a co-worker pay for your lunch?
« Reply #5 on: June 22, 2015, 12:05:03 PM »
I would not in this situation.
But I do have coworkers who pay for my lunch sometimes, and then I pay for theirs next.

SomedayStache

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Re: Would you let a co-worker pay for your lunch?
« Reply #6 on: June 22, 2015, 12:42:04 PM »
I'd clarify that you have plenty of other money, but you like to stick to a strict budget as an exercise in willpower and taking her up on that would kind of ruin the game of budgeting for you.  So thank her for her offer and tell her you'll catch them next month.

This helps clarify it.  Yep.  Thanks  all.

My coworkers and I do talk about budgeting fairly regularly which is why I felt comfortable giving my true reasoning in my initial email.

kimmarg

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Re: Would you let a co-worker pay for your lunch?
« Reply #7 on: June 22, 2015, 12:55:09 PM »
I've let a coworker buy me lunch. We both worked a long day outside the office doing sort of PR talking to public and stopped for a very late lunch on the way back. He is slightly more senior a position than me (I'm on the bottom) and paid. He noted "when I was on the bottom the guy in my position bought me lunch so I'm passing it on - you can do the same when you move up" I thought it was quite nice of him. (Note also we were at a basic cafe no nothing outlandish)

Blonde Lawyer

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Re: Would you let a co-worker pay for your lunch?
« Reply #8 on: June 22, 2015, 02:37:44 PM »
My boss likes to go out to eat all the time and he likes company.  He knows I normally bring my lunch.  He insists on paying anytime I go out to eat with him.  I let him and enjoy the perk.  Part of it is the senior/junior thing.  Part is because he knows I'm basically going w/ him as a favor and would be happier eating my packed lunch and getting my work done.

heybro

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Re: Would you let a co-worker pay for your lunch?
« Reply #9 on: June 23, 2015, 02:10:47 AM »
I think a lot of this depends on the situation that you know better than us.

Ideally, no you would not let them pay but ideally they would understand what 'i don't have the money' meant.

But, in the real world, feelings and relationships are formed around these things and often times people don't understand the mustache way of life.

So, tread easy.

I take the bus and had to stop accepting rides homes.  I always felt like I 'owed' them something like gas money or something.  Best to just go your own way sometimes.  Unless you have a 'social' budget and are forming good social relationships some how from this or having fun with friends.  Otherwise, just say no.  Keep your life separate.

patrickza

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Re: Would you let a co-worker pay for your lunch?
« Reply #10 on: June 23, 2015, 03:50:54 AM »
You can let a boss pay, but not a co-worker.

marcela

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Re: Would you let a co-worker pay for your lunch?
« Reply #11 on: June 23, 2015, 09:03:04 AM »
Can you suggest that they go to lunch somewhere with a park/outside seating and you can join them with your packed lunch? That way you still get the companionship, but without feeling awkward about them paying for you.

I have let coworkers buy me lunch before, but they've always been higher ups making way more than me. This has mostly happened in cheap settings too, so it's not like they were covering a huge meal (under $10 worth).

Candace

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Re: Would you let a co-worker pay for your lunch?
« Reply #12 on: June 23, 2015, 09:35:48 AM »
You had an unusual month with unanticipated expenses. Couldn't you go to lunch and try to save money somewhere else in your budget? I have a small restaurant budget, and will go over if there's a decent reason to. I can usually find the difference somewhere else in my budget. Perhaps just order a cheap side dish when you go out ("I'm not very hungry; I just had a snack") and eat your packed lunch on the sly either before or after going out.

lil_miss_frugal

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Re: Would you let a co-worker pay for your lunch?
« Reply #13 on: June 23, 2015, 10:58:10 AM »
I would kindly refuse! Especially since you actually have the money. You can either use the money you do have, or just wait until you have money in your food budget.

heybro

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Re: Would you let a co-worker pay for your lunch?
« Reply #14 on: June 24, 2015, 02:17:02 AM »
I think you need to create a 'social' budget.