So how does separate accounts work when one parent is stay at home and not bringing in any income?
I am bumping this, as it is my question too.
.....
Any takers on the question?
How do you split finances if one spouse does not have income?[\b]
This thread has come up a million times. ..... Those who "cannot fathom" a thing are openly admitting to not being able to consider anything but their own personal opinion on the matter. You are then not looking to fathom the thing, but to cement your personal opinion.
Anyone who may be interested in trying to uncement that position is wasting their breath.
Wow, pretty holier than thou response..
.....
What exactly was holier than thou?
I have shortened the thread above for clarity... The bolded part is the portion I found "holier than thou"
I am not trying to uncement anyone's ideas, but learn more. You claim in strong language that I can not consider anything but my own opinion.
Then you did not attempt to answer a specific, practical, question.
Why do I say this?
... because my opinion and experience is that I generally see marriage = joint money. period., but realize by reading this thread that joint "family" money can be spread across multiple accounts with various levels of controls and assignment to individuals....
... I find other's primary arguments against separate accounts -- re: hiding one's finances by using split accounts -- sounds reasonable, but is actually egregious, as even with entirely joint accounts I can quickly think of four ways to hide money or spending from my spouse.
Lastly, the unanswered question is this, maybe others can help if I provide specifics:
I have a spouse that has been SAHD / Out of work for many years, not entirely his fault. (Illness, moving for my work, desire for SAHP). Any separated savings he may or may not have had has since been absorbed into one of the home purchases, or used to pay cash for a family car. Like others, we did not change the financial arrangements we had set up in our early 20's, for us, that is joint everything.
I would like some of the advantages of separate accounts, (for both of us, namely independent planning and control purposes, like FI for the saver while the other spends) but I see three not-great methods:
1) Give him an allowance for personal spend, but he can "look not touch" what is in my account, which is used to pay for everything, by my making the payments directly. Seems like a bad idea from a human nature "teamwork" standpoint, a bit like treating him like my 15 y.o..
2) Split my pay in two, and divide it into two accounts, and pretend it just "magically appears" for both of us. Divide expenses in half. -- This seems artificial, but what are the other reasons against this? Does anyone do this with two incomes -- e.g., have the total income split, so identical money is placed into each person's account? Why wouldn't this work well, do you think...? or Would it be likely to?
3) Create a big joint account with all the income, feeding two identical, tiny personal accounts -- but wait, this is what we have now, except the personal accounts amount to $250/month "cash" envelopes, for clothes, lunches, gifts, school courses & books, phone plan upgrades, donations, or whatever... seems to be the same to me as one joint account, with more overhead. I must admit, I do like the allowances, as we just started them about 18 months ago and there are many many advantages to having money for yourself.
So - any takers? what other good options have I missed, and can you point out problems with 1) and 2).??