Author Topic: Why am I bothering?  (Read 4806 times)

Rdy2Fire

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Why am I bothering?
« on: July 18, 2019, 02:55:33 PM »
So I kind of FIRE'd unintentionally or unexpectedly or whatever when I became unemployed.

When I first stopped working I hadn't really planned to FIRE so was looking at jobs and one which seemed somewhat interesting disappeared, came back then was gone again. Now they called and arranged to fly me in for an interview. Not really expecting any real answers here but just thought to myself why bother maybe it's the Type-A coming back (referencing a thread in Post-FIRE forum. Anything like this happen to others?

Frankies Girl

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #1 on: July 18, 2019, 02:59:33 PM »
They're flying you out and paying for it? Why not do it even if you don't have to take the job. This is the exciting part about being FIREd - job opportunities are based off of pure interest instead of whether you have to have a job.

At the least, you get a mini site-seeing trip and possibly overnight stay in a reasonably nice hotel. Mini paid vacation!

2sk22

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #2 on: July 18, 2019, 03:16:26 PM »
Definitely go for the interview. You have financial independence, a powerful asset!

Rdy2Fire

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #3 on: July 18, 2019, 03:23:49 PM »
They're flying you out and paying for it? Why not do it even if you don't have to take the job. This is the exciting part about being FIREd - job opportunities are based off of pure interest instead of whether you have to have a job.

At the least, you get a mini site-seeing trip and possibly overnight stay in a reasonably nice hotel. Mini paid vacation!

Funny, first thing I thought is well I get miles and sadly it's just a day trip so no site seeing literally in at 9:30am out at 2pm


Definitely go for the interview. You have financial independence, a powerful asset!

LOVE IT!! Yes, yes it is..

A Fella from Stella

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #4 on: July 18, 2019, 03:26:23 PM »
If you don't hate flying, and especially if you have a friend you see, you owe it to yourself to turn them down and let them make a bigger offer.

Thoughts?

Rdy2Fire

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #5 on: July 18, 2019, 03:37:04 PM »
If you don't hate flying, and especially if you have a friend you see, you owe it to yourself to turn them down and let them make a bigger offer.

Thoughts?

I don't hate flying, I don't mind it and it's a run I used to fly alot; I wouldn't  be seeing any friends. As for the offer they are interviewing 3 people, I know what my number would need to be for me to consider it and includes some time off (even unpaid) soon. I mean I may like this whole FIRE thing :) Also regardless of the offer, always ask for more!!

A Fella from Stella

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #6 on: July 18, 2019, 03:39:04 PM »
If you don't hate flying, and especially if you have a friend you see, you owe it to yourself to turn them down and let them make a bigger offer.

Thoughts?

I don't hate flying, I don't mind it and it's a run I used to fly alot; I wouldn't  be seeing any friends. As for the offer they are interviewing 3 people, I know what my number would need to be for me to consider it and includes some time off (even unpaid) soon. I mean I may like this whole FIRE thing :) Also regardless of the offer, always ask for more!!

Please update us when you make a decision. I think it's great that you are in such a fortunate spot.

Rdy2Fire

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #7 on: July 18, 2019, 08:05:26 PM »
If you don't hate flying, and especially if you have a friend you see, you owe it to yourself to turn them down and let them make a bigger offer.

Thoughts?

I don't hate flying, I don't mind it and it's a run I used to fly alot; I wouldn't  be seeing any friends. As for the offer they are interviewing 3 people, I know what my number would need to be for me to consider it and includes some time off (even unpaid) soon. I mean I may like this whole FIRE thing :) Also regardless of the offer, always ask for more!!

Please update us when you make a decision. I think it's great that you are in such a fortunate spot.

Will do. This company seems strange in their timing so I meet them next week who knows when they will decide anything

Rdy2Fire

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #8 on: July 24, 2019, 07:12:41 AM »

Please update us when you make a decision. I think it's great that you are in such a fortunate spot.


A Fella from Stella

Well no decision yet but had the interview, flew in and met near airport, interviewer was over 1 hr late, we spoke for about 2 hrs I flew home. Decision next week and I am one of three other two after my meeting. Haven't mentioned that if the numbers were right (seem to be in range of what I'd have to have) I'd need some significant time off 2 months in; I figured why influence the decision.

2sk22

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #9 on: July 24, 2019, 02:05:24 PM »
You have a lot of leverage since you're not in a hurry. Good luck - hope you get an offer :-)

caracarn

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #10 on: July 24, 2019, 02:10:34 PM »
I read a lot into how the company interacts with you from the start.

Being an hour late shows lack of concern for you.  To me a major red flag.  As a FIRE person, think long and hard before you proceed with these folks.

Rdy2Fire

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #11 on: July 24, 2019, 10:14:23 PM »
I read a lot into how the company interacts with you from the start.

Being an hour late shows lack of concern for you.  To me a major red flag.  As a FIRE person, think long and hard before you proceed with these folks.

100% agree.. I mean we met at an airport the interviewer was flying in but in my mind you scheduled it, you were meeting me and two others same location, same day why not get in the night before knowing you had my meeting at 8:30.

Related side note I got up at 3:30 am to get to an airport before 5 for a 5:25 boarding and was there over an hour early for a position I don't need

nereo

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #12 on: July 25, 2019, 04:25:39 AM »
I read a lot into how the company interacts with you from the start.

Being an hour late shows lack of concern for you.  To me a major red flag.  As a FIRE person, think long and hard before you proceed with these folks.

100% agree.. I mean we met at an airport the interviewer was flying in but in my mind you scheduled it, you were meeting me and two others same location, same day why not get in the night before knowing you had my meeting at 8:30.

Related side note I got up at 3:30 am to get to an airport before 5 for a 5:25 boarding and was there over an hour early for a position I don't need

It's too late for this one, but when you are being headhunted you can negotiate even your circumstances.  I would have agreed to fly out but asked that my return trip was the following day, and they cover a hotel room near the airport, giving me time to explore a bit.  If they're going to pay the flight they probably won't blink at providing a nice hotel room.

Do you have any clarity on your original question ("why am I bothering?") ?

Rdy2Fire

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #13 on: July 25, 2019, 06:19:19 AM »
I read a lot into how the company interacts with you from the start.

Being an hour late shows lack of concern for you.  To me a major red flag.  As a FIRE person, think long and hard before you proceed with these folks.

100% agree.. I mean we met at an airport the interviewer was flying in but in my mind you scheduled it, you were meeting me and two others same location, same day why not get in the night before knowing you had my meeting at 8:30.

Related side note I got up at 3:30 am to get to an airport before 5 for a 5:25 boarding and was there over an hour early for a position I don't need

It's too late for this one, but when you are being headhunted you can negotiate even your circumstances.  I would have agreed to fly out but asked that my return trip was the following day, and they cover a hotel room near the airport, giving me time to explore a bit.  If they're going to pay the flight they probably won't blink at providing a nice hotel room.

Do you have any clarity on your original question ("why am I bothering?") ?

I could have and have negotiated that in the past but it was somewhere I've been many times and didn't need a day/night to explore especially since it was raining.

As for the original question, no I am not sure, I guess maybe just to see what the offer is, if it comes maybe because I am not sure if I am truly FIRE'd and in the back of my head wondering do I need more $$ maybe like I said in original Type-A kicking into high gear

Ironically I received a calendar invite today for a discussion with another executive from the company

caracarn

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #14 on: July 25, 2019, 06:31:00 AM »
Sounds promising.  They clearly liked the meeting.

One thing you may find (I found it too in my journey that involved downsizing my job to something I enjoy more) is that when you are not the typical money grubbing whore that more people are who have this innate need for the job, you interview totally differently and people sit up and take notice.  You are more relaxed, as the outcome is relatively irrelevant to you.  If it works, great, if it does not, no sweat.  Nothing gets employers mouths watering like someone they think they can't have who seems to have a skill set they need. 

On the other hand, I think it is common to second guess.  I did the same thing for a while about the move I just made.  I kept creating excuses as to why I would not reach out to this employer.  I would do it after the holidays.  I would do it after the other opportunities had dried up.  When I finally did, I had the offer in hand in about two weeks.  Finding a place that really wants your skill set and where you are appreciated is a gift not everyone gets.  Hopefully this becomes that for you and you can pad your stache a bit while enjoying the ride.

Rdy2Fire

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #15 on: July 25, 2019, 07:33:07 AM »
Sounds promising.  They clearly liked the meeting.

One thing you may find (I found it too in my journey that involved downsizing my job to something I enjoy more) is that when you are not the typical money grubbing whore that more people are who have this innate need for the job, you interview totally differently and people sit up and take notice.  You are more relaxed, as the outcome is relatively irrelevant to you.  If it works, great, if it does not, no sweat.  Nothing gets employers mouths watering like someone they think they can't have who seems to have a skill set they need. 

On the other hand, I think it is common to second guess.  I did the same thing for a while about the move I just made.  I kept creating excuses as to why I would not reach out to this employer.  I would do it after the holidays.  I would do it after the other opportunities had dried up.  When I finally did, I had the offer in hand in about two weeks.  Finding a place that really wants your skill set and where you are appreciated is a gift not everyone gets.  Hopefully this becomes that for you and you can pad your stache a bit while enjoying the ride.

caracarn,

On your first point I totally agree. I have always approached interviews in a two way street manner, as in I am interviewing you as much as you are interviewing me. Doing this not only enables someone (i.e me) to be more relaxed but also more interactive which would be employers like. I've never had an issue getting a job or offer so I think a combination of what you're saying and what I am is, in itself, some of the best advice for anyone reading this.

As for the second part, I think it's important to always follow up whether it's positive of negative. Typical this also makes you stand out and yes it is hard to find the right fit is something people don't always get; it isn't always about the money, you can always make more, it's about the opportunity and if it's right.

As for padding my stache I'm not sure how much I care what I can say is this is the 3rd time this particular company has set up a meeting/call with someone and the person that was supposed to call failed to actually do so. Going back to my point about me interviewing them as much as they interview me makes this a 2nd strike. I'd say 3rd but one person I sent a note to and they responded apologizing saying they had something come up and asked to reschedule. I sent that note very quickly so maybe they would have contacted me, I am not sure, it's very easy to send an email or txt or anything to say you can't make it so this is a HUGE red flag on how they operate.

Rdy2Fire

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #16 on: July 31, 2019, 10:55:46 AM »
For those following... Been two more interviews/calls for a total of 6 plus the fly-in meeting and have what I believe is a final follow-up call set up for this week. Very up in the air on this still so we will see what's on the table

kei te pai

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #17 on: July 31, 2019, 01:26:18 PM »
In your situation, I think you should pay more attention to the red flags. Its not all about the money. Waste of time and general life energy matters. Unless the new position would offer you something stimulating and enjoyable in itself I would be wary of taking this job.

Loren Ver

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #18 on: July 31, 2019, 01:35:25 PM »
For those following... Been two more interviews/calls for a total of 6 plus the fly-in meeting and have what I believe is a final follow-up call set up for this week. Very up in the air on this still so we will see what's on the table

So of all the meetings, how many of them were prompt?  Are you still at 2 strikes?

Rdy2Fire

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #19 on: July 31, 2019, 01:51:20 PM »
In your situation, I think you should pay more attention to the red flags. Its not all about the money. Waste of time and general life energy matters. Unless the new position would offer you something stimulating and enjoyable in itself I would be wary of taking this job.

I totally am paying more attention to the red flags. I can't say if it would be "enjoyable" as I haven't really enjoyed work in a long time and it's been more of a means to an end. Of course that's the dilemma but I do think it could be stimulating and in theory I could make it fun since I know at any point I could just walk away yet I am "wary"



So of all the meetings, how many of them were prompt?  Are you still at 2 strikes?

I am not sure any were prompt haha. I'd say they were all pretty close outside of the ones mentioned so I'll stick to 2 strikes

Rdy2Fire

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #20 on: September 13, 2019, 01:25:40 PM »
I never did come back to this for those who were following along or messaged me...

In the end the company d*cked around for a couple more weeks asking me for references they never called, playing phone tag intentionally etc. I didn't really care since at that point I was over it, they weren't happy about the time off obviously and were searching for another candidate. In the end I gave them an ultimatum saying if I didn't have an offer on the table by the end of the day I was moving on. Another couple of days of them claiming to try and get in touch and I sent a final email basically saying thanks for your time. So 2 weeks for today I'm off :)

kei te pai

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #21 on: September 14, 2019, 03:15:37 AM »
A good ending I would say.

Zamboni

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #22 on: September 14, 2019, 04:38:45 AM »
I am constantly shocked by how poorly the people at some companies (including where I currently work) treat people they are interviewing. The reason could be carelessness, ineptitude, bandwidth problems, intentional d*cking around because they think they can, or just plain old rudeness: it really doesn't matter.

Sounds like you dodged a bullet.

Rdy2Fire

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #23 on: September 14, 2019, 08:00:48 AM »
A good ending I would say.

Yeah I wasn't upset about it at all :)


I am constantly shocked by how poorly the people at some companies (including where I currently work) treat people they are interviewing. The reason could be carelessness, ineptitude, bandwidth problems, intentional d*cking around because they think they can, or just plain old rudeness: it really doesn't matter.

Sounds like you dodged a bullet.

You and me both! The irony is I am VERY upfront on all interviews I have ever been on and more so in the last few years explaining that this is me interviewing them as much as the other way around. If they don't understand that they have already failed however some are just horrendous.

Funny enough people sometimes think they need coaching to go on interviews and although some do I typically tell them be straight forward and as concise as you can with answers and I personally never discuss specific compensation, assuming I know they are in my range and vice versa. However MOST interviewers need coaching, it "could be carelessness, ineptitude, bandwidth problems" but I think it's more that this isn't their profession. Typically they are just asked to speak to a candidate by a manger etc and have NO IDEA what they are doing.

In this particular case I was dealing with the person who would be my manager and people who worked for him, since he/they found it acceptable to miss calls, meetings, be on time and have follow through I already realized this wouldn't work well. Once he started the "intentional d*cking around" I was sure I wouldn't be going but told the recruiter if the offer comes in whatever it is (I knew the numbers) you should be happy I will be asking for 25K more. In the end the outcome is fine and he even said get in touch when you return as our business if growing and there could be a spot, I believe this actual spot will still be open :)

Zamboni

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #24 on: September 14, 2019, 02:04:41 PM »
^Sounds like a win if you do decide you want the money later.

Loren Ver

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Re: Why am I bothering?
« Reply #25 on: September 15, 2019, 06:00:13 PM »
Thank you for the update.  I don't think I would appreciate that person as a manager, you know, after they are no longer trying to woo you into a role with their best behavior.  Yeesh.