Thanks for the update: I was just reading this now and was going to post two comments:
1. I have a friend who, after ten years of hard work, just landed a plum college professorship (he's actually a law historian with both JD and PhD). He feels that the job market problems are overstated and you can still get a job if you are smart, network, work your ass off, etc.--not just coast through a program.
2. Another option for the academically minded is teaching in a private school. No teaching credentials required. If you can coach a sport and have no expectation of personal privacy, teaching in a boarding school is kind of a gravy train. (Pay isn't that high, but free housing, free food, free international trips with students, conference funding, etc., etc.