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The correct answer is for me to simply not give an F about this. It is a goal of mine.
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Yeah, this. FWIW: I went through the same thing. I bought a car that is not only showy, it is a very classic "Hi, I'm a 60-yr-old balding overweight guy who is worried his penis doesn't work anymore, so I am overcompensating so at least you'll think I'm rich" car. I bought it simply because nothing in the world is as much fun as driving that car. But I absolutely hate everything that that car says about who I am -- I bought it in spite of its showiness, not because of it.
And, honestly, it took me a good decade to pull the trigger. I spent much of my life telling myself that I am not the kind of person who buys that kind of car. But then I finally realized that refusing to buy the car was still contorting my life around what other people think: while most people buy the showoff car to convince complete strangers of their awesomeness, I was
not buying the showoff car because I did not want complete strangers to think I was the kind of person who would buy that kind of car. It was a decision founded in weakness, not strength: I was modifying my behavior and denying myself what I wanted because I was afraid some complete stranger would think badly of me.
Real power is deciding what you want for yourself, even if others will disapprove. I really like the way Malkynn put it: sure, I care; I still want people to think well of me. But not enough to let their opinion decide what I can and can't do. Fuck that. They're not living my life.
And, yes, I do get the irony of preaching self-empowerment through material purchases on the MMM board. Necessary disclaimers that I am FI and paid cash, yadda yadda. But yeah, still no excuse for it. Luckily, I don't care anymore. :-)