Software - have you looked into Mint.com? It was created by the Quicken people, but it's free. Only downside is you have to provide them all your internet passwords, but most people don't care.
Pay off that CC, but you already knew that.
Get rid of the whole life policies on you, your wife, kid #1, and kid #2. They are all likely a poor use of your money, and they cost waaaay tooooo much. That money will do you much better if you pay off debts and invest it once the debt is gone.
Pay off the cars as soon as you can, but at least the rates are relatively low.
All that discretionary spending will hurt and you need to try to reign it in, but don't make it your priority without being on the same page with your wife. Do what you can on the stuff you have full control over, like the life insurance. It's a waste of money unless it's term, and you're on the right track with letting the term go once your other assets are sufficient to replace the income stream.