This...
'The minute I stopped caring about what other people thought and started doing what I wanted to do is the minute I finally felt FREE.'
I use to feel the same as you and genuinely cared what my extended family, friends and even neighbors thought. Then after many years of struggling it dawned on me after the passing of a loved one, who cares?! Really! At the end of the day, I do not answer to others. In the end, I made the best decisions possible at the time based on my situation and limited resources. I have no regrets because I chose them; so I own my choices. I often wondered when I have a child will send them to private school and the answer I was shocked to learn was, no. I want more time to spend with my child, to teach, share and most importantly become actively involved with their growth and development. These are some of the top reasons why Mustachianism and financial independence both resonate so deeply within me. So I chose to go without in certain areas such as eating out, vacationing to exotic locals, buying a new car, and most importantly, deciding the life I want to live is created each day and it is not dependent on how much I spend to make me happy or fulfilled. If I can reduce excess in my life, I can find creative alternatives to save, invest and make my monies work harder for me. In the end, financially speaking I will have the freedom to dedicate more time with my family. To me this freedom is priceless and I feel it can only be achieved by saving more and making sure it grows, neither of these actions are tied to spending more.
FIRE_HELP! I hope you find greater life balance. It is wonderful you want to offer more opportunities to your family, but I am often reminded of the question should parents save for their children's college or their own retirement. Well, to me the answer to this question is the same as yours. It is all about balance and making sure your decisions are aligned with your greater life goals. I would be saddened if I gave everything to my child's education/development and neglected my health and retirement. To me, extremes are not healthy and simply end up causing more work to correct later on.
I feel balancing your limited time, resources and life goals, can help you eliminate the "noise" others create around you. Good luck.