Well, yes, even optimizing relentlessly, housing and insurance are likely to be the biggest chunks of the budget. That's better than cars and cellphones! The giving is your call. Is it more important to give money now, knowing that you are also giving retirement time by reducing savings, or to give more time later (and possibly money as well)? People decide both ways.
Here's the thing...it may or may not be possible to retire extremely early with a given set of circumstances. MMM did it with two high incomes, no student debt, and not starting a family until after the financial work was done (and then having just one). His family also doesn't have pets, disabilities, or major family/faith commitments if I remember the situation correctly. Other people, with debt, lower incomes, or pre-existing financial commitments (child support, for instance) may not be able to travel the same distance so quickly.
But everyone will do better for themselves with the MMM techniques than without them. Try not to look around at other people and feel discouraged...look at your own improvements and feel proud! And own your choices...would you really want to get to the finish line faster if it meant not having your children? As Weight Watchers says about food...you can have anything you want, but you can't have it all at once and in unlimited quantities!