When to bring up Mustachianism and finances? It's none of your frickin' business; you've just met this person. That's just bad manners. Might as well grill her on politics and and get her stance on abortion while you're at it.
Doesn't sound like your hyper passive approach is working out that well. She didn't go to the party where she could have kissed you. And you chose to attend a party so far away from her, where she wouldn't know anyone else - what were you thinking? Did you get scared? Why didn't you go to her?
Knowing the politics and ideologies that are promulgated on this forum, I'm certain you'll find no shortage of men and women here who will assure you that asking verbally if you can kiss her is a winning play. I have my doubts. Seems very weak, very passive, and a great way to get caught in the friend zone (do kids today even know who Chris Rock is?). Unfortunately, it's very difficult to advocate for an assertive/aggressive approach w/out sounding like an arrogant caveman rapist. So I won't do that. But my own experience is that the passive approach is less likely to be successful.