I know there have been other discussions on this topic, but this one is mine.
Having recently become a FIRE convert (rather than FIRkind-ofE), it has become clear to me that leaving our HCOLA (coastal SoCal) needs to be part of the plan.
Not leaving SoCal would probably push out our FIRE date (right now I'm aiming for 4 years or so, age 44) by 5 years. Even aside from the expense, I'm not particularly in love with the place, what with the traffic/overcrowding/pollution, and haven't ever seen it as my desired retirement destination. Right now, the area I'm targeting to move to is Ashland, OR. We have no family or friends in the area, but are seriously considering it for a number of reasons (climate, outdoors, schools, culture, etc).
Here are the issues:
1. Leaving friends - we have a few very close friends who live about an hour away from us. They're understandably not thrilled with this idea. This would probably be the hardest part for us as well. We do have some other friends as well that we'd be leaving behind, but it's really the close ones we'd miss.
2. Leaving family - As far as family, our roots are actually in the midwest, but I do have some relatives in the area whom we see occasionally. My Mother-in-Law also lives nearby; she moved to SoCal to be near us/the grandkids. Whether or not she would be willing to move again is up in the air. I'm not counting on it, but it's possible.
3. Uprooting the kids - unfortunate, but kids generally recover. I'm aiming to have them settled in the new area before the older one gets to middle school.
4. Logistical - Sell the house before the move? Before FIRE? Carry two houses for a short time? Rent first? I do want to take a couple of vacations up there to make sure we enjoy it, having never actually visited before. Of course, Ashland itself isn't what's driving these issues; we'll face them wherever we decide to move.
Anyone have advice and/or experience on any of these issues? Anything else to consider? I know that people definitely caution against the loss of social circles when moving to retire. However, I don't see a great way around it in our situation, while still being able to live somewhere I'd really enjoy. I do think that Ashland is a single-day driveable distance from SoCal, at least for me (11 hours or so), and I could definitely be on board with driving down to stay with friends for a week or two 1-2 times per year. Not the same as seeing your friends several times a month, I recognize.