LOL - ex- spendthrift in MMM disguise here:)
It's called Spendthrifts Anonymous, because we need help and a support system, as in forever and a day. My prescription - hang out in the challenge threads and the badass threads - it is bar none the best place to flex your untrained frugality muscles.
Just get over yourself right now and accept the possibility that you might well trip and fall in the future. It will not be the end of the world, you will dust yourself off and start over - ONE DAY AT A TIME.
You will be in good company and you will find that you are not alone in taking one step at a time.
Show up for your daily dose of MMM to strengthen your resolve and remind yourself why you are here.
Focus on your goals - keep going over your expenditures and rejoice in the little victories, that you can share in the threads like "What did you do today to save money?"
I know all about fragile and scared - like you are now. It is only natural, since you are now attempting to navigate in
enemy - NO - I mean frugal friend territory for the first time. You'll be fine, if it is important enough to you. It is smart to realize that some paths will never take you to your desired destination - so let's take a different road!
Most of us ex-spendthrifts struggle occasionally, so what? You get better, you get stronger and one day you notice that you only blew it once or twice a year instead of all the time.
Remember MMM can be rough and tumble and face punches are part of the twelve step program here:) You made it this far, you are good to go!:)
Sometimes we take it on the chin too:)
It is all a learning curve - so good luck on your journey!
I recently emerged victorious from a 20+ year battle against overspending, under - saving, and a reliance on credit that kept me in debt my whole adult life. I feel like a spindly legged newborn colt when it comes to money management, and wondering if there are other newbies here for whom being frugal isn't always so easy?
The good news: I have automatic payroll deduction to 401k, and about $250/mo via direct deposit into a savings account for small emergencies like a broken fridge or minor dental work (now at about $1,000 total and hopefully only growing; still a little shaky on learning not to "borrow" from it). I've learned to budget so I can live a perfectly nice albeit modest lifestyle within the rest of my take home pay.
The problem now? I lack confidence about permanently shifting my attitudes and habits toward spending and saving, since as a lifelong spendthrift it feels like a huge victory just to have attained my lightweight version of frugality.
Stop right there - never compare yourself with others on this board. Let them inspire and motivate and most of all educate you, but you are not them.
Everyone here has different challenges, income, health and skills - perspectives and lifestyle.
Congrats on having recognized and acted upon - one of the most important frugal principles that as a newly minted Mustachian with an ex-spendthrift mentality - you absolutely must adhere to..... automatic deductions are your best friend.
If you think you will be tempted by $1000 sitting there, accessible to you - open a savings account at another bank, preferably one that will give you 1% interest.
Remove temptation:) whenever and wherever you can. There will be plenty other opportunities to succumb to - so think about how to minimize exposure. That is your new MO.
Focus on the results you want to achieve - visualize them and think about your next victory. Do you know what your values are? what is important to you on a deep down honest level? and what kind of lifestyle is comfortable-uncomfortable-acceptable to you, now and/or in the future?
My motto is, "I'm re-directing my money". It reminds me that it is still my money and I am in control - I decide where to put my money and where my own values lie.
Natural savers don't quite understand some of our struggles - let them roll their eyes and feel virtuous:). It's OK, I wish I was in that camp, but it is not in my nature.
Test the waters as to what works for you and revise your plans and goals along the way. Roll with it, enjoy your life, because you are now on the road to becoming an awesome Mustachian who can figure out how to live a good life completely on your own terms.
Welcome to MMM:) le-weekend - enjoy the ride.