Author Topic: Smartphone Envy  (Read 31490 times)

sol

  • Walrus Stache
  • *******
  • Posts: 8433
  • Age: 47
  • Location: Pacific Northwest
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #50 on: August 11, 2013, 08:22:19 AM »
FWIW, quality smart phones are getting fucking cheap if you know where to look, and avoid the high markup brands.

Where do you look and what are the high markup brands?

Left

  • Handlebar Stache
  • *****
  • Posts: 1157
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #51 on: August 11, 2013, 02:05:57 PM »
I'd just say a phone from a generation or two ago would be good/cheap. Galaxy S II is still a good phone and under $100, original S could be for <$50 if you look around.

NestEggChick (formerly PFgal)

  • Stubble
  • **
  • Posts: 238
  • Location: Boston-ish, MA
    • Nest Egg Chick
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #52 on: August 11, 2013, 10:13:38 PM »
I'd like to come at this from a different angle. My question to you and your wife would be, at what age will you start treating your kids like adults? If they're not adults at 20 or 21, when will they be adults? Will they be adults at 25? At 30?

If you're paying for everything now, then they aren't learning how to budget and save, and they won't magically learn these skills on graduation day. That means there's a greater chance they'll end up moving back in with you or relying on your help for rent and groceries. You aren't doing them any favors by paying for everything now. Not only do I think they should pay for their own smartphones, but I think you should sit them down and make it very clear what they are responsible for from this point forward. Maybe from now on they have to earn their own grocery money or pay for their own movies out. The more financial responsibility you give them before graduation, the greater a gift you're giving them. Someone else mentioned The Millionaire Next Door and I highly agree. Read the part on parents supporting their kids and leading to their dependence and you and your wife may want to cut back even more.

By the way, I'm one of those kids who wasn't fully supported. My parents paid for college and housing, but I paid for all entertainment including meals out, movies, dates, my first car, and my first cell phone. It never even occurred to me to ask them to pay for these things. Far from resenting them, I've thanked them for this! When I graduated I already understood how to handle money, so I got a job and an apartment and never had any debt.

gooki

  • Magnum Stache
  • ******
  • Posts: 2917
  • Location: NZ
    • My FIRE journal
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #53 on: August 12, 2013, 01:07:00 AM »
FWIW, quality smart phones are getting fucking cheap if you know where to look, and avoid the high markup brands.

Where do you look and what are the high markup brands?

Apple, HTC, Samsung. Essentially any company that is spending up large or marketing, is recouping those cost plus more via higher markups.

My current best pic Android phone is the Haier W910.

IP45 Waterproof, Dustproof, Scratch resistant 4.5"IPS 720x1280 Gorilla Glass II Screen, Snapdragon Dual Core 1.5GHz, Android 4.0.4,  1GB ram, 8GB rom plus SD card slot, 8.0MP Rear Camera, 1.3MP Front Camera.

$125 brand new, delivered to your door.

Last gen models can also be a good buy on the used market.

Numbers Man

  • Guest
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #54 on: August 12, 2013, 02:38:30 PM »
@PFgal - They are off the payroll when they graduate and are interviewing & expected to land jobs from fortune 500 companies this fall.

NestEggChick (formerly PFgal)

  • Stubble
  • **
  • Posts: 238
  • Location: Boston-ish, MA
    • Nest Egg Chick
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #55 on: August 12, 2013, 03:19:19 PM »
@PFgal - They are off the payroll when they graduate and are interviewing & expected to land jobs from fortune 500 companies this fall.

That's great! So then they should be ready to take the first steps towards financial responsibility by paying for their own smartphones now.

MrsPete

  • Magnum Stache
  • ******
  • Posts: 3505
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #56 on: August 13, 2013, 07:16:40 AM »
This seems to have turned into, "What's an appropriate amount of support for your young adult child?" 

First, to those who say you won't give your kids an allowance, I'd say you're planning to miss out on a great learning experience.  The key is to give the kids enough allowance that they can afford a small treat . . . but little enough that big treats require saving.  AND at the same time, you make them responsible for some of their own necessities, purchased, of course, from their allowance.  This means that they have to remember, "I'm going to need pencils for school" and forego buying a pack of candy.  They'll mess up -- most kids have to mess up multiple times before they understand delayed gratification -- but if you don't bail them out, they learn from their mistakes.  Failure to have pencils isn't a make-or-break situation, so it's much better to provide that learning opportunity than to wait 'til they're making larger decisions that have bigger consequences.  Allowances can be tied to chores, though small children don't seem to make the connection very well.  Around 10 kids are ready to see that work = allowance = things I need and want; prior to that age, it's a bit fuzzy -- they can get work = allowance OR allowance = things, but their brains are still in the concrete operations phase, and they just can't quite make the jump yet to see the big picture.

If you don't give an allowance, the other option is to buy the things your child needs when he needs them -- I'm thinking of small children here; if you wait 'til they're old enough to work outside the home, you're already too late.  Where's the learning experience in that?  They learn that sometimes you say yes, sometimes you say no.  They need to control a small amount of money for themselves to internalize the value of a dollar.  They need to experience success and failure in small terms so that when they're teens and they do get that first job, they're ready to handle a little more. 


As for kicking my kids off my phone plan, why on earth would I do that?  We have the old-fashioned X amount for the first phone, $10 each for the second, third and fourth phones.  So I would only save $10/month by denying my college student a phone.  If she got a phone on her own, it'd cost her much more than that.  We're getting good value for the money right now, and we're never anywhere near using all our minutes.  As far as I'm concerned, if she wants to stay with this level of service, she can stay on our plan after she finishes college.  At that point I'd want her to give us $120/year for the service, but I've spent a great deal of effort pushing the concept of spending on things that're a good value, and I don't see bad value here.


Some of you seem intent upon the idea that you should pay essentially nothing for your adult child -- kick them out into the world, let them learn independence, let them suffer a bit.  While I'm not suggesting that you should spoil them and attempt to insulate them from the realities of the world, that's a bit extreme.  If you want your child to go to college (or other post-high school training), it's probably going to cost money.  It's probably going to cost more money than the adult child is able to pay without going into debt, and debt is one of those things that you don't realize is a mistake until it's too late.  Instead, it's better to provide enough help that the student -- with plenty of hard work -- can bridge the gap and graduate without debt.  Example:  My college daughter's tuition is roughly 7K/year.  Say she worked at $8/hour.  It'd take her 875 hours (almost 22 weeks of full time work) to earn that tuition.  That's pretty tough for a full-time college student:  With taxes, it's essentially working full time every week of summer AND working part-time during the school year AND never spending a penny on anything except tuition.  It's ignoring textbooks, transportation costs, and living expenses  Instead of saying, "You're an adult now -- go figure it out, hope you do okay", it's better to work together to figure out what the student can do to pay a portion of the cost and you, the parent, help make it possible.  That might be letting the student live at home, and he pays tuition.  It might be paying his tuition and dorm while he pays his books and meal plan. 

Yes, a senior should be paying more than a freshman.  A young adult should progressively work towards financial independence, but I can't buy into the "You're an adult now, and I trust you'll figure it all out" idea. 

People on this board like to use Millionare Next Door as a defense against helping ease their young adult children into full adult responsibilities.  If you read the portion that addresses helping your children, you'll see that it definitely cautions against doing too much for them:  Basically it suggests that you should not pay your children's necessities (i.e., rent and car payments) so they can afford luxuries (i.e., vacations) -- that allows them to believe they can live a more expensive lifestyle than is actually possible -- but it also gives examples of parents who have helped their children appropriately -- for example, the guy who started Kinkos.  It also says that among people who have become financially successful, the most common financial help they received from their parents (as adults) was help getting through college.






Samsam

  • Bristles
  • ***
  • Posts: 273
  • Location: Charlotte
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #57 on: August 13, 2013, 11:02:15 AM »
First, to MrsPete:
I like your outlook on how to handle money with children (and adult children).  This forum sometimes scares me when I see a large amount of parents ready to kick their kids to the curb as soon as they turn 18, just so they can retire a couple years earlier...and yes I understand that you cannot just give money and things without expectations, that is how you get unappreciative/spoiled kids, but there is most likely a happy medium.  So I liked reading about your views that you will be helping your kids out and ease them into full adulthood (because these days 18 is only legally an adult).  And in the back of my mind I'm just hoping most of the parents on the site that are saying they will cut them off will ease into it or at least give the kid that expectation well before the time comes.

To the OP:
I think that since they are seniors in college they should at least pay for the phone and plan difference due to them being so close to graduation and soon on the way to fending for themselves.  Had they been freshman my answer would have changed to maybe gift them the phone for a holiday and have them pay the difference, some kind of agreement like that.

Numbers Man

  • Guest
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #58 on: August 13, 2013, 11:27:26 AM »
Thank You MrsPete for your thoughtful response and eloquent delivery. I also want to thank all of the other posters for their insight. I was not in favor of adding the Smartphone data to our plan. Our children have not been spoiled over the years and rarely ask for luxurious items. With that said, my wife took them out to Verizon and sealed the deal. I believe we paid $100 to $150 in total for the 2 iphones. I believe the data plan will be an extra $60 per month (for the 2 phones) plus the associated junk taxes and fees. The Rolling Stones said "You can't always get what you want". So I said my peace to everyone in the household on this subject but didn't put my foot down since family harmony is very valuable.

The kids voluntarily said that they would pay for the data plan starting in January. Like one other poster said, people need to slow down and make strategic purchases and not worry about delaying Financial Independence by a month because they're buying their kids something(I'm paraphrasing what the poster after MrsPete said). I agree, we all can't be so militant about being the big bad ass wealthy person that denies our children everything in the name that they have to grow up and support themselves.

I have every confidence in my kids standing on their own two feet after graduation. My wife and I have counseled them throughout their lives. They are math & science guys that don't smoke or drink and are very level headed about money. They have the rest of their lives to work after graduation. I can see the finish line.


Mr.Macinstache

  • Pencil Stache
  • ****
  • Posts: 922
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #59 on: August 13, 2013, 11:40:37 AM »
BOOOOOOOO!

just kidding. ;)

FYI, I lived with my parents for 3 months after I graduated. Hey, they had a nice pool! Until I finally got tired of their company and wanted my own place. I think I was around 24 when I finally got a 'real' job and moved out. This is becoming more common as parents are taking care of their kids longer and longer. But I worked through college, used student loans and my parents helped me by paying my rent.

I think that as long as the kids have some sort of job, they will appreciate the value of a dollar and how to manage it. Maybe I missed it, are they working at all?

Samsam

  • Bristles
  • ***
  • Posts: 273
  • Location: Charlotte
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #60 on: August 13, 2013, 12:19:33 PM »
The kids voluntarily said that they would pay for the data plan starting in January.

Sounds like you got some great kids :)

Mr.Macinstache

  • Pencil Stache
  • ****
  • Posts: 922
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #61 on: August 13, 2013, 12:22:26 PM »
The kids voluntarily said that they would pay for the data plan starting in January.

Sounds like you got some great kids :)

They will gladly pay Dad Tuesday for a hamburger today.

Cinder

  • Bristles
  • ***
  • Posts: 468
  • Location: Central PA
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #62 on: August 13, 2013, 12:30:21 PM »
I'm just appalled when I hear the commercials that say that 'Having a smartphone is like having a tutor in your pocket' and go though this spiel acting out Einstein, Curie, Edison etc.. on social media.

Give me a break! 

(I think I hear it as an add on pandora)

arebelspy

  • Administrator
  • Senior Mustachian
  • *****
  • Posts: 28444
  • Age: -997
  • Location: Seattle, WA
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #63 on: August 13, 2013, 12:48:17 PM »
Like one other poster said, people need to slow down and make strategic purchases and not worry about delaying Financial Independence by a month because they're buying their kids something(I'm paraphrasing what the poster after MrsPete said). I agree, we all can't be so militant about being the big bad ass wealthy person that denies our children everything in the name that they have to grow up and support themselves.

It's not about that at all.

I genuinely believe you are harming them by supporting them in this way.  (See: earlier reference to book recommendation with actual data.)

It has nothing to do with the cost - I wouldn't spare any expense if it was the right thing to do for my family.

But you have to do what you believe is right for you and your family.  You're the only one that has to live with the decision, so if you did that, great.
I am a former teacher who accumulated a bunch of real estate, retired at 29, spent some time traveling the world full time and am now settled with three kids.
If you want to know more about me, this Business Insider profile tells the story pretty well.
I (rarely) blog at AdventuringAlong.com. Check out the Now page to see what I'm up to currently.

Mr.Macinstache

  • Pencil Stache
  • ****
  • Posts: 922
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #64 on: August 13, 2013, 12:50:54 PM »
Like one other poster said, people need to slow down and make strategic purchases and not worry about delaying Financial Independence by a month because they're buying their kids something(I'm paraphrasing what the poster after MrsPete said). I agree, we all can't be so militant about being the big bad ass wealthy person that denies our children everything in the name that they have to grow up and support themselves.

It's not about that at all.

I genuinely believe you are harming them by supporting them in this way.  (See: earlier reference to book recommendation with actual data.)

It has nothing to do with the cost - I wouldn't spare any expense if it was the right thing to do for my family.

But you have to do what you believe is right for you and your family.  You're the only one that has to live with the decision, so if you did that, great.

I agree, we spoil our kids in small ways and there's always an excuse, no matter how small the purchase or reason. All of that sets the precedent for how our kids will handle being independent.

ace1224

  • Bristles
  • ***
  • Posts: 468
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #65 on: August 13, 2013, 01:05:01 PM »
i'm still on my parents family plan.  we have a kick ass deal from alltel that verizon has to honor bc we are grandfathered in.  there is no way in hell i'm getting my own plan and i'm almost 31. i cut them a check once a year.

Samsam

  • Bristles
  • ***
  • Posts: 273
  • Location: Charlotte
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #66 on: August 13, 2013, 01:08:44 PM »
i'm still on my parents family plan.  we have a kick ass deal from alltel that verizon has to honor bc we are grandfathered in.  there is no way in hell i'm getting my own plan and i'm almost 31. i cut them a check once a year.

+1

In my family it would cost all of us a lot more to be on our own plans.

Mr.Macinstache

  • Pencil Stache
  • ****
  • Posts: 922
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #67 on: August 13, 2013, 02:10:56 PM »
It's not an issue of who's plan you're on, its an issue of who's paying for it.

Samsam

  • Bristles
  • ***
  • Posts: 273
  • Location: Charlotte
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #68 on: August 13, 2013, 02:15:22 PM »
It's not an issue of who's plan you're on, its an issue of who's paying for it.

I agree with that as well.  But I tend to be trusting of people until they prove otherwise.  I mean if his kids say they will pay for the plan...who am I to call them liars??

arebelspy

  • Administrator
  • Senior Mustachian
  • *****
  • Posts: 28444
  • Age: -997
  • Location: Seattle, WA
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #69 on: August 13, 2013, 02:48:18 PM »
It's not an issue of who's plan you're on, its an issue of who's paying for it.

I agree with that as well.  But I tend to be trusting of people until they prove otherwise.  I mean if his kids say they will pay for the plan...who am I to call them liars??

Sure.. no one is questioning the kids future payment of the plan.
I am a former teacher who accumulated a bunch of real estate, retired at 29, spent some time traveling the world full time and am now settled with three kids.
If you want to know more about me, this Business Insider profile tells the story pretty well.
I (rarely) blog at AdventuringAlong.com. Check out the Now page to see what I'm up to currently.

Samsam

  • Bristles
  • ***
  • Posts: 273
  • Location: Charlotte
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #70 on: August 13, 2013, 03:40:08 PM »
It's not an issue of who's plan you're on, its an issue of who's paying for it.

I agree with that as well.  But I tend to be trusting of people until they prove otherwise.  I mean if his kids say they will pay for the plan...who am I to call them liars??

Sure.. no one is questioning the kids future payment of the plan.

Oh, maybe i misunderstood an earlier post then.... I thought that this:  "They will gladly pay Dad Tuesday for a hamburger today." meant that he thought they wouldn't hold true to the payment plan.  Sorry if I'm mistaken. 

arebelspy

  • Administrator
  • Senior Mustachian
  • *****
  • Posts: 28444
  • Age: -997
  • Location: Seattle, WA
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #71 on: August 13, 2013, 03:55:26 PM »
Ah.. I didn't interpret that post that way, but I can see how you did.

I took it as "they get the smartphone now and are fine promising to start paying in January" - not that they won't pay, but they're happy getting the benefit now, and paying later.
I am a former teacher who accumulated a bunch of real estate, retired at 29, spent some time traveling the world full time and am now settled with three kids.
If you want to know more about me, this Business Insider profile tells the story pretty well.
I (rarely) blog at AdventuringAlong.com. Check out the Now page to see what I'm up to currently.

Samsam

  • Bristles
  • ***
  • Posts: 273
  • Location: Charlotte
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #72 on: August 13, 2013, 03:59:44 PM »
Ah.. I didn't interpret that post that way, but I can see how you did.

I took it as "they get the smartphone now and are fine promising to start paying in January" - not that they won't pay, but they're happy getting the benefit now, and paying later.

Oic, I guess I was looking at it from a pessimistic side...bad Sam.

MrsPete

  • Magnum Stache
  • ******
  • Posts: 3505
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #73 on: August 14, 2013, 09:13:19 AM »
I'm just appalled when I hear the commercials that say that 'Having a smartphone is like having a tutor in your pocket' and go though this spiel acting out Einstein, Curie, Edison etc.. on social media.

Give me a break! 

(I think I hear it as an add on pandora)
Yeah, I also hate the one about how tablets make things smart and bright, the implication being that if you buy your kid a tablet and let him surf the internet all day, he will be smart and bright.  If you want your kid to be smart and bright, he should be exposed to technology, but his access should be limited.  He also needs lots of time in nature, free time to fill with his own imagination, and time reading. 

iwanttobelive

  • 5 O'Clock Shadow
  • *
  • Posts: 43
  • Location: Midwest
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #74 on: August 14, 2013, 09:44:09 AM »
I wanted to switch to MMM's $10 and use Google Voice when in wifi/hotspots/home. Unfortunately I found the only way to do that was to lug around my computer and call from that or get a smart phone. So I ended up buying an unlocked smart phone and I am only using around $5 of talk time of the Sim card and the rest of the calls on google voice for free. I really like it, but the initial cost of the smart phone will take a few months to break even if I would have kept my trackfone. It feels worth it just for the nice camera on it (better then my last point and shoot) and the nice stuff that comes on the smart phone. The convince of the banking apps, email, doing texts with a keyboard are really nice luxuries I could probably do without, but I thought it was worth it. Its been working great with google voice.

MrsPete

  • Magnum Stache
  • ******
  • Posts: 3505
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #75 on: August 14, 2013, 09:53:05 AM »
Like one other poster said, people need to slow down and make strategic purchases and not worry about delaying Financial Independence by a month because they're buying their kids something(I'm paraphrasing what the poster after MrsPete said). I agree, we all can't be so militant about being the big bad ass wealthy person that denies our children everything in the name that they have to grow up and support themselves.

It's not about that at all.

I genuinely believe you are harming them by supporting them in this way.  (See: earlier reference to book recommendation with actual data.)

It has nothing to do with the cost - I wouldn't spare any expense if it was the right thing to do for my family.

But you have to do what you believe is right for you and your family.  You're the only one that has to live with the decision, so if you did that, great.
Disagree.  A mid-point, a balanced point is almost always best when you're talking about a teen or a young adult child.  It's absolutely worked well for my teen and young adult children. 

My oldest, since she's out of high school, is the best example:  She is super-appreciative of the fact that she's able to complete her degree in four years and that she'll have no debt when she's finished.  She's frugal, whether it's her own dollar or our dollar she's spending.  She sticks to the budget we've given her.  The only thing she ever asks us for is a ride to/from school for the occasional weekend (she doesn't have a car).  Because she works a reasonable number of hours during the school year, she's excelling at her schoolwork:  She currently has a 3.95 GPA and isn't concerned about being officially accepted into nursing clinicals next year.  Because her grades are tops, she's having no trouble maintaining her scholarship.  She's working very hard both in school and at her job, and she is happy and healthy and is moving towards a bright future.  What we've provided her is not a free ride; rather, it's enough help that she can work part-time and be highly successful in college. 

My own college years were quite different.  My parents did not help me one bit financially, though I did have some scholarship and financial aid money.  To survive, I worked more hours than was good for me as a college student.  I was hungry on a regular basis, I frequently cut out cardboard to tuck into my shoes because I'd worn holes in them, and I sometimes did without necessities such as textbooks and updated eyeglasses.  I sometimes blew off classes when an extra work shift was available, and because I took light schedules, I spent seven years in college.  Looking back, younger-me had options that she didn't see (the best choice would've been for me to do a stint in the military, which I never considered at that point), but without help or even guidance from home, I did what I considered best at the time, but I also see that I was incredibly lucky in numerous ways: I lived in dangerous places, yet I was never the victim of a violent crime (though I was robbed, and that was one of the lowest moments of my life), and I never suffered an accident or illness in the time I was without health insurance.  My parents preached the very message you're espousing:  Children have to learn independence, you must suffer to appreciate what you have.  Going straight from being a teenager in mom and dad's house to completely on my own was much too big a step.  It was not a healthy or happy time, and looking back I don't really know how I managed it -- except that I realized that education was my best option to get out of that situation.

Again, I'm not saying hand your teens and young adults everything on a silver platter, while you work your fingers to the bone.  That is just as bad a mistake as the one my parents made with me.  Rather, working together to help them ease into the world of adulthood is the best choice.  The process begins while they're in high school and extends through college.  Appropriate financial help, coupled with unlimited emotional support and guidance is the best choice. 

If your experience with your adult children has been different, I'd like to hear about it. 


   
 

Mr.Macinstache

  • Pencil Stache
  • ****
  • Posts: 922
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #76 on: August 14, 2013, 11:52:28 AM »
Ah.. I didn't interpret that post that way, but I can see how you did.

I took it as "they get the smartphone now and are fine promising to start paying in January" - not that they won't pay, but they're happy getting the benefit now, and paying later.

Yes, that's what I meant. Except if anyone remembers Popeye, Wimpy never paid for the burgers, because, he was Wimpy. :) I'm not saying his kids wont pay, but again, it sets a precedent that the "buy now, pay later" method of financial management is somehow ok. To which I disagree.

I've been sort of buckling down on my young kids and so far there's no push back. The like saving to buy something, it makes them feel proud that they earned it.

rufflina

  • 5 O'Clock Shadow
  • *
  • Posts: 41
  • Location: San Jose, CA
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #77 on: August 14, 2013, 12:30:17 PM »
You don't need a smartphone in college for projects, or for being social (I just finished undergrad in December). Texting and calls are good enough. You already got them the iPhones, but people I know in this situation usually buy themselves an iPod Touch. Colleges should have free wireless for students in all the buildings, so that would be good enough. Personally, I just took my laptop everywhere, which is far superior than any smartphone. I was planning on sticking to the dumbphone/iPod Touch combo plan for the foreseeable future, but now my company pays for my cell phone (including data and cost of the phone)...because I'm an iPhone/iPad software developer. ;P

I agree with MrsPete. It probably depends on the kid though, and MrsPete's kid seems very responsible. My parents paid for my college expenses, which I am very thankful for. It meant that I didn't have to work, which meant that I could graduate faster, which saves a LOT more money than getting a part-time job, especially since at our income level I was a full-tuition student.
« Last Edit: August 14, 2013, 12:45:55 PM by pianista »

arebelspy

  • Administrator
  • Senior Mustachian
  • *****
  • Posts: 28444
  • Age: -997
  • Location: Seattle, WA
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #78 on: August 14, 2013, 12:47:19 PM »
EDIT: Post removed. Apparently this was not interpreted the way I intended it.  My apologies.
« Last Edit: August 17, 2013, 09:17:55 AM by arebelspy »
I am a former teacher who accumulated a bunch of real estate, retired at 29, spent some time traveling the world full time and am now settled with three kids.
If you want to know more about me, this Business Insider profile tells the story pretty well.
I (rarely) blog at AdventuringAlong.com. Check out the Now page to see what I'm up to currently.

davisgang90

  • Handlebar Stache
  • *****
  • Posts: 1360
  • Location: Roanoke, VA
    • Photography by Rich Davis
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #79 on: August 16, 2013, 06:09:31 AM »
My oldest has had a smartphone for several years.  He is starting sophomore year and has always paid for his own phone.  He buys it and pays for his portion of the family plan.  His only job is his allowance and babysitting he does for us.

I agree with others that your daughters should pay for their own to include the handsets and the service. 

FunkyStickman

  • Pencil Stache
  • ****
  • Posts: 525
  • Age: 49
  • Location: Louisiana
    • Living Outside the Box
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #80 on: August 16, 2013, 08:04:22 AM »
Tell her that her children are not babies anymore and she needs to stop buying their underwear and socks for them.

Tell her you have no problem with them getting smartphones, they're capable and intelligent adults who can make their own decisions.  Paying for living expenses for your 21 year old kids is not helping them, it's teaching them to be dependent instead of helping them grow into fully functioning adults. 

Dear God, yes, a thousand times this!!

They're seniors in college?? Why are you even considering this?

Sorry... don't want to come across as being an ass. I'm really a nice guy.

But seriously... that's Facepunch material where I come from. I'm 39 and I still don't own a smartphone.

(EDIT)
Yeah, I shouldn't point fingers. I see you figured it out, and I have to agree, household harmony is pretty important. I hope it works out for you! It's not something I would ever do, but you know... :) Good luck with it!
« Last Edit: August 16, 2013, 08:09:36 AM by FunkyStickman »

CupcakeStache

  • 5 O'Clock Shadow
  • *
  • Posts: 41
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #81 on: August 16, 2013, 08:11:06 AM »
Words and a story

To be honest, I didn't read this whole rant, but I skimmed through, so if some of the below is irrelevant, I apologize.

Wow, calling MrsPete's extremely reasonable-in-tone anecdote a "rant" seems like an excessive characterization.

NinetyFour

  • CMTO 2023 Attendees
  • Walrus Stache
  • *
  • Posts: 6876
  • Age: 62
  • Location: Southwestern US
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #82 on: August 16, 2013, 08:11:31 AM »
I am 52 and I have never had a smartphone.  I view it as an unnecessary luxury.  But should someone like to buy me one, I wouldn't turn it down.  ;-)

SJS

  • Stubble
  • **
  • Posts: 136
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #83 on: August 17, 2013, 05:26:08 PM »
I'm with the majority here - let them get smart phones, but let them PAY FOR THEM!  Seriously, they are ADULTS here.  If they've made it through college this far (being in their last year) without a Smart Phone they can certainly make it through their senior year with what they've been using all along. 

Time to cut the cord - you've probably been helping/paying for college, yes?  If so - REQUEST DENIED for the Smart Phone.  What do they think you are, a human money machine?  Let them figure out how to get one if they really want one (sell some of their "stuff" on ebay or Craigslist).  Having a Smart Phone is NOT a necessity in this day & age - contrary to popular believe.  I just turned 50 and just got a Smart Phone for the first time (be bought it on Ebay for $150 and got the MMM plan!).   

Denying your kids is NOT a form of child abuse.  Giving them everything, however, is.    Good luck with this one, Daddy-O!  Let us know what you decide!! 

DocCyane

  • Bristles
  • ***
  • Posts: 389
  • Location: USA
  • Keep going. You're doing just fine.
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #84 on: August 17, 2013, 05:34:09 PM »
Being 21 means something completely different these days, I guess. When I was 21, I graduated college, waved to my parents, got on a plane to move 2000 miles away, didn't call them for a few days until I was settled, and saw them next 5 years later.

Cell phones weren't invented yet.

I'm feeling very grumpy and old right now.

marty998

  • Walrus Stache
  • *******
  • Posts: 7372
  • Location: Sydney, Oz
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #85 on: August 18, 2013, 03:52:02 AM »
Being 21 means something completely different these days, I guess. When I was 21, I graduated college, waved to my parents, got on a plane to move 2000 miles away, didn't call them for a few days until I was settled, and saw them next 5 years later.

Cell phones weren't invented yet.

I'm feeling very grumpy and old right now.

I think you'll find this "kidult" disease stretches to 29 now. I've come to the conclusion that the parents unconsciously sabotage their efforts to get the kids out of the nest, purely because they actually enjoy having "young people" around.

Baby boomers have no right to whinge about Gen Y, when all they want is to have Gen Y around them so that some of our generation's attitude and approach to life rubs off on them. (I sense a flame war about to start over this. Old people coming at me with pixel weapons. Yikes)

James81

  • 5 O'Clock Shadow
  • *
  • Posts: 49
Re: Smartphone Envy
« Reply #86 on: August 18, 2013, 07:08:28 PM »
Thank You MrsPete for your thoughtful response and eloquent delivery. I also want to thank all of the other posters for their insight. I was not in favor of adding the Smartphone data to our plan. Our children have not been spoiled over the years and rarely ask for luxurious items. With that said, my wife took them out to Verizon and sealed the deal. I believe we paid $100 to $150 in total for the 2 iphones. I believe the data plan will be an extra $60 per month (for the 2 phones) plus the associated junk taxes and fees. The Rolling Stones said "You can't always get what you want". So I said my peace to everyone in the household on this subject but didn't put my foot down since family harmony is very valuable.

The kids voluntarily said that they would pay for the data plan starting in January. Like one other poster said, people need to slow down and make strategic purchases and not worry about delaying Financial Independence by a month because they're buying their kids something(I'm paraphrasing what the poster after MrsPete said). I agree, we all can't be so militant about being the big bad ass wealthy person that denies our children everything in the name that they have to grow up and support themselves.

I have every confidence in my kids standing on their own two feet after graduation. My wife and I have counseled them throughout their lives. They are math & science guys that don't smoke or drink and are very level headed about money. They have the rest of their lives to work after graduation. I can see the finish line.

I knew as soon as you said your wife was the one pushing for it that this post was coming. Lol

I'm not sure why you didn't at least go for a compromise of some sort, like smart phones on an Airvoice plan or something. Doesn't it bother you that your opinion basically got bowled over and ignored?