Author Topic: Should I move or find a new housemate?  (Read 2464 times)


  • 5 O'Clock Shadow
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Should I move or find a new housemate?
« on: March 11, 2017, 09:11:53 PM »
My sub-lessor was laid off and moved out. I kept the deposit so I have a month to find another sub-lessor.  The main lease ends in 3 months. This is a two-bedroom, two bathroom apartment and I occupy the other room.   

I'm not sure whether to extend the lease or to move out. I told my landlord that I might extend it to at least December 2016 (by 6 months). He said he would give me the same lease terms, so there won't be a rent increase.

To make matters more complicated, I may have to move around December or a few months after that. My boyfriend and I are planning to relocate but we don't know when it will happen. He's a software engineer and he just started looking for work west of the Rockies. I should be able to work from home. We're working through a pre-marital planning workbook so we're approaching marriage intentionally but I don't yet have 100% guarantee that we will definitely marry. I asked him if he would consider moving in with me, so that I would not have to deal with a sub-lessor's lease when we move on, but he is reluctant to do so since it would give him a 60-90 minute commute. His current commute is under 30 minutes. 

It's taken three years, and I've finally been able to furnish my apartment so that it feels like home. I would like to take my furniture with me when we relocate (oriental carpets, living room set, dining table, kitchenware, bureau).  If my boyfriend and I don't end up getting married, I would buy a house. Should this occur, I would want to keep my furniture.  However, I may have to sell off or put my furniture in storage if I move to another apartment.

Here are what I see as potential options - what do you advise?

1)  Staying and renting out the second room - this would allow me to have a low-cost rent in a high cost of living area.  It would also mean that I wouldn't have to deal with two moves in 12 months or stress about selling off or storing my furniture.  But  I'm stressed about the turnover and the work involved in finding another housemate. Finding a replacement has taken two months each time. For each month that I don't sublet the room, I have to cough out $600. 

2) Move out in 3 months and move into a studio. It would cost an extra $300 a month and moving twice in one year. On the other hand, it would eliminate the issue of finding a housemate and allow me to keep my own furniture. This is an expensive proposition for furniture that cost me a grand total of $350 (and a lot of time - they were carefully selected thrift shop and hand-me-down items) to acquire. Note that if I move out, I would still be on the hook for two months of the second bedroom's rent, so that would be $1200 on top of the rent increase.

3) Move out in 3 months and rent a room in another apartment in June- Rent would be the same, but I would need to get rid of all of my furniture or put them in storage. Most of the available rooms I've seen are small and the rest of the apartments are fully furnished. As with option two, I would still have to cover the rest of the rent for two months, for a total of $1200.

A lot of issues are getting conflated here - marriage, furniture, relocation, an uncertain future....Right now I'm leaning toward staying put, finding another housemate, and dealing with the relocation issue once my boyfriend finds his next job and we have agreed to marry.  I feel that I can't plan my life around his job or living situation unless he (and we) have settled on a job and marriage. However, I'm not sure staying in this apartment is the best way forward given the stress around finding housemates. But I'm also too Mustachian to willingly pay an extra $300 in rent.

What would you do if you were in my shoes?



  • Walrus Stache
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Re: Should I move or find a new housemate?
« Reply #1 on: March 11, 2017, 09:25:34 PM »
If you only knew the future, these types of decisions would be so much easier, eh?

I'm not sure what's best.

I can make one piece of advice that I *am* sure of - whatever your next living arrangement is, make sure you can easily handle the full payment on just your income.  That way, if you end up living alone again, it's a nuisance instead of a disaster. 

Best of luck in making your choice!


  • 5 O'Clock Shadow
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Re: Should I move or find a new housemate?
« Reply #2 on: March 13, 2017, 03:52:19 PM »
In the same situation, and finances permitting, I would stay put and do my best to rent out the other room. Moving takes up a lot of headspace (I moved at least once per year for about 15 years straight) and it sounds like you've got a lot of other [much more important] decisions to make right now. But I agree with SwordGuy that you should only do this if you have $600 that can cover it. Will it sting to pay it, yes, but it's not a permanent arrangement. 


  • Magnum Stache
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Re: Should I move or find a new housemate?
« Reply #3 on: March 13, 2017, 03:59:38 PM »
Agree with both above, with one caveat: Don't do your best to find new housemate. Doing one's best in anything is a part-time job. It doesn't sound like you have the oomph for another part-time job right now. You have your regular job, your relationship, your marriage-preparation, etc.

Put it out there (detailed ad, very select interviews), and if one comes reasonably easily, receive them.

Otherwise, pay the difference to stay in your place until you move to a place you can, yes, pay on your own long term OR that is the new long term home that you and BF are paying for.

Just my two cents, coming from the perspective of currently seeking housing in an insane market and considering getting a place with space for roommate.


  • Pencil Stache
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Re: Should I move or find a new housemate?
« Reply #4 on: March 13, 2017, 04:14:02 PM »
Hiker Girl,
you could always  consider renting  out the room on air B and B while you are looking for a roommate. Everyone in NYC does it for extra money. Just screen the people, and or only sublet to females.