OP, you have brought up separate issues and conflated them into one, clouding things a bit. Here is what I would say about the issues separately:
(1) While you were engaged, before you were married, she took a risk on what she considered her dream job. You thought it was a bad decision but said nothing. She stopped getting paid within 2 months. Afterwards you married her. This issue is closed and inadmissible. She may not have had the best judgment, but neither did you, and you don't get to say "told you so" unless you actually told her so.
(2) You two got pregnant and she wants to be a SAHM. This is one of those issues that you should have discussed before getting married. Did you discuss it and she changed her mind, or did she just not discuss it? Either way, this needs to be a joint decision -- she cannot dictate, you cannot dictate, you guys need to keep discussing it until you agree on a solution or there is a total impasse, and an impasse means the end of your marriage. For some reason people earlier in the thread have confused joint decision with the man dictating things.
(3) Should you take two vacations and see her family? Sounds like a budgeting decision. You have a household income and household expenses and must make joint decisions about them. She should not be able to dictate, neither should you. If the decision on expenses is tangled up with who brings home the bacon in your household, you're going to have a bad time. If you don't talk about joint decisions in a transparent and mutually open minded way, you're going to have a bad time. I think you'll get the hang of it.