We have stuff in common :)
I am a sole parent (i.e., no child support, no other involvement, etc).
My kid is diagnosed with autism and something called severe nonverbal learning disability.
I homeschool him.
I have explored living in an RV.
Here are my thoughts:
1. I agree with the posters who say that accessing community supports is important. An odd thing that makes me happy is that if I die, my son will live with pre-determined people, and those pre-determined people will have a list of my son's support network. I have so much peace knowing that my son would be connected with all of these, especially during and after such a critical period. Of course, it rocks that he has these while I'm alive too! His network includes a couple of local librarians, our banker, the dude that did his assessment/diagnosis, our family doctor, our counsellor, his respite worker (four hours per week), etc. i.e., Some casual, some formal, all essential.
2. Homeschooling - Rocks! :) I had my kid in school for a couple of years. He loved it at first, but by middle of Grade 1 he was starting to hurt. Despite my paying $2000+ for a private assessment so that he would have supports in school, and despite the government of BC sending $17000 to the district as a result, after a full year he still had not a single minute. Not a single minute. And they had no plans to implement any, simply because he was quiet thus could be ignored and the money could quietly be funneled elsewhere. After all my advocacy was unsuccessful, I finally pulled him. We both love homeschooling. I may have to put him in school (i.e., "free child care") for a few months next year so I can get a few work projects wrapped up, but then I would assess again.
Lots of kids with "ignorable" special needs in our area homeschool because the school system here is a bit of a nightmare for them. We love it. From October through April, my kid has about 10 hours per week of community-based classes (art, gym, lego robotics, etc), which is fun. He's always been smart, despite his clear developmental delays, but moving from school to homeschooling, it was amazing to watch his joy, self-esteem, and confidence -including in his ability to learn- reestablish then bloom.
3. RV - I have friends who raised their daughter/step-daughter from infancy to about age 3 in a van. No bathroom, no cooking area, just a regular little van. They did this so they could complete university. They parked within the city and stayed connected with their community. Now they have: degrees each, incredible careers they love, a very happy, healthy daughter who is about to graduate high-school, a new toddler, their dream home. So, I believe this is a solid way to go. More and more students in BC are living in vans so they can afford university.
This said, in researching RV-living for my kid and I, here's what I found: buying then parking such a beast would cost almost the same as renting an apartment for several years. Decision made. I'm sticking with renting the cheapest place I can get. (Things like diet and sleep have made the biggest differences for my son, so I'm reluctant to go kitchen-free, etc.)
4. Money - I have been self-employed from home for ages, which worked out beautifully when my kid was born with all these issues. I had really good income, and needed no government supports. Just over a year ago, a third-party business did everything in their power to take my "competing" business down -and succeeded. For the first time, we are newly accessing supports. (I've been detailing this in my Journal here on MMM.) I have indeed felt much shame, frustration, embarrassment, and sadness, but I still do it because that's what the programs are there for, and accessing these makes all the difference for my son's quality of life.