Author Topic: Starting over older and tired-er  (Read 2537 times)

psychomoustache

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Starting over older and tired-er
« on: December 07, 2016, 08:14:31 AM »
I haven't been on these forums in a long time. I don't offer excuses - they're ridiculous anyway. But when I am feeling burnt-out and sick of this world, I often find myself thinking of this forum, and the wonderful lives lived thanks to mustachianism. This gives me a lot of hope.

I haven't been here in about 3 years-ish. In between time - went back to school, did quite a lot - but the empty ache remains - b/c I am so sick of achieving things, b/c I want something else.
 
The "something else"is peace of mind, time, and joy. I am not looking for ER - I am a psychotherapist and psychoanalyst, and I love my work. I want peace of mind from the grind that tells me I have to earn more, do more, be more... this is directly antagonistic (ironically if you like) to my work... duh.

So I am hopping back in here with you, and though I'm sure I'm not the only one who has hopped (on and off) the proverbial wagon, I hope that us lousy wanna-be frugals can find a little spot. I will start up a journal again, make some small and Not-So-small changes, and listen to you all.

It's good to be back, "officially".

Stash Engineer

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Re: Starting over older and tired-er
« Reply #1 on: December 07, 2016, 10:06:36 AM »
Let me be the first to say:  "Welcome back!"

swick

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Re: Starting over older and tired-er
« Reply #2 on: December 07, 2016, 10:14:04 AM »
Welcome back home, psychomoustache!

I've often wondered how you were getting on. I remember you struggling to decide if you wanted to go through all the hoopla of getting things sorted so you could practice in France.

In the journey for wanting "something else" I have found Jonathan Field's book: "How to Live a Good Life"  a great place to start :) http://amzn.to/2gCKZBf

redbird

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Re: Starting over older and tired-er
« Reply #3 on: December 07, 2016, 10:30:37 AM »
If you love your job, you don't have to early retire. I WOULD still encourage you to work towards financial independence, if you're not there already. What financial independence does is give you freedom. It's not just potential freedom to quit your job. Honestly, I was FI several years before I actually early retired. If you're FI, this means that you will have less stress on you. Sure, it's still annoying when unexpected expenses come up even when you have the money to pay for it. But it's much better feeling to KNOW that you can pay for that sudden car repair, hot water heater replacement, etc and to not have to scramble trying to find a way to afford it. If you're FI, you can enjoy your job more - you know that you are working there because you WANT TO, not because you HAVE TO so you can pay the bills and put food on the table.

FI definitely gives me a huge amount of peace of mind in life, and I think EVERYONE should strive for it. :)

pachnik

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Re: Starting over older and tired-er
« Reply #4 on: December 07, 2016, 10:39:54 AM »
Hey, welcome back!   I thought about you while you were gone. 

This past fall my husband and I went to Paris for a week so I was in your expat country.  We both just loved it!

bugbaby

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Re: Starting over older and tired-er
« Reply #5 on: December 07, 2016, 11:15:10 AM »
Welcome back, psychmoustache! I'm also just back from a 2 year hiatus, and I remember your posts! 

I also retired and moved abroad for 2years to pursue other dreams, then just returned and I'm about to 'un-retire'. I had severe burn-out too at the time. But the beauty of a mustachian life was the freedom I had to take time off, rest and recharge for 2 whole years.

It's not about pressure to earn more, save more, retire early. Not at all! It's about freedom to enjoy your current life and have the choice to change course, or rest or slow down without the financial constraints that make people feel trapped. Best wishes on your next steps.

Sent from my Nexus 5 using Tapatalk


psychomoustache

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Re: Starting over older and tired-er
« Reply #6 on: December 07, 2016, 02:00:35 PM »
Wow you guys thank you so much, I appreciate it, thank you so much for the encouragement. I am so happy to be back. I started a new journal - so far pretty boring ; )
Yes, I went back to school - hot a second masters - and (if you remember) during that time they CHANGED the French law and I no longer pay the VAT tax! Oy, as we say back in the Old Country.
Welcome back, psychmoustache! I'm also just back from a 2 year hiatus, and I remember your posts! 

I also retired and moved abroad for 2years to pursue other dreams, then just returned and I'm about to 'un-retire'. I had severe burn-out too at the time. But the beauty of a mustachian life was the freedom I had to take time off, rest and recharge for 2 whole years.

It's not about pressure to earn more, save more, retire early. Not at all! It's about freedom to enjoy your current life and have the choice to change course, or rest or slow down without the financial constraints that make people feel trapped. Best wishes on your next steps.

Sent from my Nexus 5 using Tapatalk



Yep - burn-out - and I appreciate you sharing this. It should be obvious but there is no way to work one's way out of burn-out. Duh.

 
If you love your job, you don't have to early retire. I WOULD still encourage you to work towards financial independence, if you're not there already. What financial independence does is give you freedom. It's not just potential freedom to quit your job. Honestly, I was FI several years before I actually early retired. If you're FI, this means that you will have less stress on you. Sure, it's still annoying when unexpected expenses come up even when you have the money to pay for it. But it's much better feeling to KNOW that you can pay for that sudden car repair, hot water heater replacement, etc and to not have to scramble trying to find a way to afford it. If you're FI, you can enjoy your job more - you know that you are working there because you WANT TO, not because you HAVE TO so you can pay the bills and put food on the table.

FI definitely gives me a huge amount of peace of mind in life, and I think EVERYONE should strive for it. :)

This is my thinking, yep. Now I want to check out that book
Welcome back home, psychomoustache!

I've often wondered how you were getting on. I remember you struggling to decide if you wanted to go through all the hoopla of getting things sorted so you could practice in France.

In the journey for wanting "something else" I have found Jonathan Field's book: "How to Live a Good Life"  a great place to start :) http://amzn.to/2gCKZBf

Hoopla indeed. I can practice in France but it still f-ing Hoopla, b/c it's FRANCE goddammit.  ; )

Y'all give me warm fuzzies. Merci.

Dusty Dog Ranch

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Re: Starting over older and tired-er
« Reply #7 on: December 07, 2016, 05:39:19 PM »
I'm relatively new here, but I can relate to the feelings of burnout, while also having the desire to do more and do better in my chosen field, which I also really love. It's a tug of war, and it feels like some days the burnout is winning, other days the optimism is.  Since the election there is also a feeling of despair (I work in natural resource conservation) over the top of it all. My field is not high pay, so the stash-building can feel terribly slow also.

My escape is travel. Now i find myself looking at the stash and trying to figure out how long we could travel on a chunk of it. Probably not the best plan for ER, but a sabbatical sounds so very tempting. Ironic, considering we just completed building a house on our acreage and now I want to get away?!?

Coincidentally, my most recent trip was in September to Brittany for 3 weeks! It may tell you something about me and DH that one of our favorite things about the trip was that we didn't run into another American until we got to Cancale at the end. Too close to MSM I suppose! What part of the peninsula do you call home? I would put Breizh up near the top of places we've been. Megaliths, hard cider, and all those miles of walking trails made us happy campers.

Welcome back and I look forward to seeing more of your posts. À bientôt!