Author Topic: Paying for my kids private school  (Read 10321 times)

MikefromOak

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Paying for my kids private school
« on: February 16, 2016, 07:15:52 PM »
Ok here is the situation. My daughter is going to college next year and we're thinking about how to pay. It would be $25,000 per year, after tax money. Suffice to say I do not have $2000+ per month to drop each month for 4 years.

I have a home that has equity I could tap, at about 2.15%. I could pull $100,000 out, pay the first years $25,000 and invest the remaining $75,000 in 1, 2 and 3 year CDs.  The loan would be amortized over 10 years.

Is this the way to go?
« Last Edit: February 16, 2016, 07:23:04 PM by MikefromOak »

pbkmaine

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #1 on: February 16, 2016, 09:01:14 PM »
Why does she have to go to a private college?

ETBen

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #2 on: February 16, 2016, 09:11:05 PM »
The financial situations you mentioned, I'm not knowledgeable enough about. I will second pbkmaine that are you sure the college is worth it?  I'm hesitant to say that b/c my kids are younger and I haven't been in the emotional part of your situation yet.

I do know firsthand that the more you fund your own college, the better you appreciate it and are prepared for the real world (having done it both ways). I don't think my experience is that uncommon: A student, failed out of 4yr, went back to community college for 2, got job with strong salary.  Finished BS while working, got six figure job.  Doing MBA now.  There are a lot of paths to success, which most 18 year olds can't define for them future selves anyway, that don't involve huge debt.

LeRainDrop

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #3 on: February 16, 2016, 09:13:31 PM »
I wouldn't do that.  Will your daughter be contributing to the costs?  Will she have a part-time job?  Are you dead-set that she will be going to this particular, expensive school?  I'm someone who went to a pricey private college, and while I certainly learned a lot and had a great experience, in hindsight, I would have gone a less costly route.

Goldielocks

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #4 on: February 16, 2016, 09:17:51 PM »
That's like paying for your kid's college degree and giving them $50k on top of it..for a nicer lifestyle between 18 and 22.

If you have the money, why not... but if you don't, it is a pretty big gift to take a loan out for, isn't it?
Wouldn't it be better to save that extra for grad school at the very least?


MrsPete

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #5 on: February 16, 2016, 09:20:36 PM »
Why does she have to go to a private college?
I was going to ask the same thing.  You're looking at the source and terms of the loan, when the better option is to look for ways to avoid it altogether!  If you're forced to borrow, at least borrow the amount for a less expensive school. 

Widget

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #6 on: February 16, 2016, 09:53:05 PM »
Why does she have to go to a private college?
I was going to ask the same thing.  You're looking at the source and terms of the loan, when the better option is to look for ways to avoid it altogether!  If you're forced to borrow, at least borrow the amount for a less expensive school.

Yes!  Even community college for 2 years, then the private college for 2 years would save a lot of money, and they'll graduate with the same degree from the private college as if they had been going there for 4 years.  Does your daughter even know what she wants to major in at this point?  Much better to figure it out and switch majors a few times at a cheaper school, then specialize at a specific school when she is certain of what she wants to do.

msilenus

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #7 on: February 16, 2016, 11:13:45 PM »
Apply for financial aid?  If so, don't tap equity first.  Your home is a big FAFSA asset shelter.  So are your retirement accounts.

Even if you only get loans, the government might subsidize the interest while your kid's in college.  If that's how it plays out, then you can tap the equity later and still come out ahead by avoiding 4 years of interest.  Maybe avoid a loan at all if you're planning on downsizing?

Overall, tapping equity doesn't sound like a bad way to go to me, assuming you're not putting your own financial health in jeopardy.  I'd do that over taking big capital gains while I'm still paying AMT, for example. 

Hard to comment on your situation without any details, BTW.

Larabeth

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #8 on: February 16, 2016, 11:25:20 PM »
Why do you have to pay for her college?  I paid my own way.  Plenty of people do.

Villanelle

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #9 on: February 16, 2016, 11:37:35 PM »
I'd start by having her pay at least 1/3 of that, especially if she'll be living at home. Going to school full time and having a PT job that earned $8k year is not a stretch at all.  Even half or $12k, wouldn't be requiring her to work insane hours on top of classes and studying. 

Giro

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #10 on: February 17, 2016, 06:41:11 AM »
How much did she earn in scholarships?  If this is a 50k school and she earned half, I'm a little more amenable to the cost.  If this is a 25k school and she earned nothing, NO WAY NO HOW.  If that is the case, send her to a community college to adjust and get a little bit of college experience.  If she didn't earn scholarships, she needs the practice and community college is the primer for big girl college. 


I'm a red panda

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #11 on: February 17, 2016, 06:44:16 AM »
I'm going with the assumption that your daughter chose this college for a reason, and she's going there. (If that assumption is wrong- I'd strongly encourage looking at state schools or private schools offering scholarships to her!)

First- have you filled out a FAFSA? Many private colleges offer scholarships that can make it for some people less expensive than state schools. Do that.  Maybe you won't get anything, but you certainly won't if you just assume you aren't going to.

Then: If loans have to be taken out, I'd have her take them out.  You can certainly help her with what you CAN afford; but if you have to borrow, why should it be YOU borrowing?  You could even give her gifts over time to help her pay them off, but I really think the liability should be on her. 

I would 100% not borrow against the house.

I'd also recommend you help her make good choices like less expensive housing, or other frugal solutions DURING college, as a lot of student loan debt creeps even higher when you have to have the best apartment, the coolest vacation, etc. Insist on at least a summer job (I know many people don't like their kids working their first year of college, but maybe you'd want her to have a PT job.)

BeanCounter

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #12 on: February 17, 2016, 06:57:09 AM »
Based on what you are saying, I don't think you all can afford private university tuition. Because you are considering putting up the roof over your head to pay for your kids education. I would explore other options.
I am absolutely against private colleges, state schools offer the same thing at half the price. Especially for undergrad. Just think of how many parents like yourself fork over $100k for their kids tuition only to have there kid come out and get the same $50k per year job as the guy in the cube next to him who went to college for $50k. Or worse you've got $100k invested in their tuition and they are unemployed.

little_brown_dog

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #13 on: February 17, 2016, 07:43:19 AM »
Before you do anything two questions -
1 - does she have any money set aside specifically for college? If not, is there a reason there are no savings (this will help the forum give you better answers for your situation)
2 - What does your financial aid situation look like?

If you have 0 money set aside for college and a relatively low income, I would certainly look into financial aid before you offer to pull money out of your home. It's possible she could receive substantial help. Never offer up money that would be otherwise "hidden."

Tetsuya Hondo

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #14 on: February 17, 2016, 08:13:58 AM »
As others have stated, there's a lot more we need to know here. I'll try to summarize:

-Has she already been accepted into the school? If not, we're probably putting the cart ahead of the horse here.
-If not, why this school? Is she looking at others? Is she open to that?
-Are you open to in-state public schools?
-Have you applied for financial aid yet? Are you aware of available loan programs, work-study, grants, etc? Some private schools have financial aid packages that make them competitive with and sometimes even more affordable than public schools.
-Can she pay some of the tuition (could be loans, etc.)?
-If you absolutely have to pay for everything, then do you have any other sources to tap money from, aside from your house? For example, I believe there might... might be some provisions (check me on this) that allow you to use certain retirement funds for educational expenses (e.g., does the Roth-IRA allow this?).

Personally, I think all kids should have skin in the game and pay at least some of the costs. While we're setting aside money in a 529 for our child's college expenses, I don't intend to pay for everything. I paid my own way. I applied for scholarships, I received student loans, and I participated in college work-study through an on-campus job. There shouldn't be any need to pull money out of your house.

What's she bringing to the table? I suggest you have a conversation about the expenses and talk through the options with her.
« Last Edit: February 17, 2016, 08:18:40 AM by Tetsuya Hondo »

AZDude

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #15 on: February 17, 2016, 08:14:24 AM »
2 years community college, transfer to preferably public university, but if she really wants the private one, then you still save $50K. The diploma wont even mention the community college and no one will ever know, other than you two. Your bank account and future self will thank you for not running up mountains of debt.

Even if you decide to ignore this advice, then I would suggest at the very least that you share the cost of her education. $50K home equity loan, $50K student loan. This should, in theory, make the education more personal to her and hopefully make her take it more seriously.

Gin1984

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #16 on: February 17, 2016, 08:15:16 AM »
2 years community college, transfer to preferably public university, but if she really wants the private one, then you still save $50K. The diploma wont even mention the community college and no one will ever know, other than you two. Your bank account and future self will thank you for not running up mountains of debt.

Even if you decide to ignore this advice, then I would suggest at the very least that you share the cost of her education. $50K home equity loan, $50K student loan. This should, in theory, make the education more personal to her and hopefully make her take it more seriously.
That is not accurate. 

Blonde Lawyer

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #17 on: February 17, 2016, 08:18:42 AM »
I'm going to give you a counter point.  While I agree with the other posters that state school kids and private school kids often end up in the same jobs, for me my life is far far far better for going to a pricey private college rather than the local state school.  In high school, I hung out with a bunch of kids that weren't very ambitious about post high school life.  I was in a long term relationship with someone from that group.  When I went off to college, I very much did what those around me did.  If I had gone to state school, that would have been partying hard, hanging with the high school crew and likely getting involved with drugs.  The private school I went to was very strict during the week.  Most of my peers were very academically ambitious and wanted to study during the week and party on the weekends only.  I followed suit.  I hardly ever did my homework in high school and put very little effort into my work - just enough to get into a good private school.  Not caring about school wasn't "cool" at my private school so I applied myself and was amazed at how well I could do.  At state school I would have been one kid in big classes and I could have skated by not doing the work and not learning.  At private school my teacher's knew me by name, would call on me socratic style, and I had to be prepared for every class.  I was actually learning. 

State school is great if you have an independently motivated kid that is going to college to learn and not party.  If you have a kid that still needs a lot of guidance, think carefully what kind of atmosphere that college will provide.  Maybe it was just the state schools where I grew up but they were notorious party schools.  A small, religiously based liberal arts college is just what I needed to get my shit together.  For me, it was worth every penny my parents and I spent.  I also received a good chunk of aid too.

Tetsuya Hondo

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #18 on: February 17, 2016, 08:22:46 AM »
2 years community college, transfer to preferably public university, but if she really wants the private one, then you still save $50K. The diploma wont even mention the community college and no one will ever know, other than you two. Your bank account and future self will thank you for not running up mountains of debt.

Even if you decide to ignore this advice, then I would suggest at the very least that you share the cost of her education. $50K home equity loan, $50K student loan. This should, in theory, make the education more personal to her and hopefully make her take it more seriously.
That is not accurate.

Why not? The diploma won't say it. On your resume you can just list the school you received your degree from. If you get a BA from Stanford, no one cares if you spent the first two years at Backwater Community College. You're a Stanford graduate.

I work in a field that focuses on hiring/selection issues. I can't imagine why any hiring manager would care about this.

The only tricky part is ensuring that you can transfer from the CC to the private school.
« Last Edit: February 17, 2016, 08:26:23 AM by Tetsuya Hondo »

Gin1984

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #19 on: February 17, 2016, 08:40:50 AM »
2 years community college, transfer to preferably public university, but if she really wants the private one, then you still save $50K. The diploma wont even mention the community college and no one will ever know, other than you two. Your bank account and future self will thank you for not running up mountains of debt.

Even if you decide to ignore this advice, then I would suggest at the very least that you share the cost of her education. $50K home equity loan, $50K student loan. This should, in theory, make the education more personal to her and hopefully make her take it more seriously.
That is not accurate.

Why not? The diploma won't say it. On your resume you can just list the school you received your degree from. If you get a BA from Stanford, no one cares if you spent the first two years at Backwater Community College. You're a Stanford graduate.

I work in a field that focuses on hiring/selection issues. I can't imagine why any hiring manager would care about this.

The only tricky part is ensuring that you can transfer from the CC to the private school.
Many employers now require your transcripts which then show the difference, at least in my experience.   

I'm a red panda

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #20 on: February 17, 2016, 08:48:37 AM »

Many employers now require your transcripts which then show the difference, at least in my experience.   

Maybe it's different if you transfer years in, but my transcript from my Bachelor's degrees shows "non-resident credit" and lists 2 courses from a community college and 8 courses I got AP credit from.  It doesn't say where the credit comes from, I just happen to know that.


I second the "the tricky part is making sure credit transfers".  A lot of community colleges are not set up to be transfer institutions. They don't know how to work with the 4-year universities.  You need to talk very seriously with the 4-year university and make sure she is taking classes that will count.  I've seen way too many students waste time and money in a community college. IMO, they are best for people who are not prepared to go to a 4-year, or whose 4-year university recommends them to make up credits needed for admission to certain programs (for example Texas A&M's partnership with Blinn CC)
« Last Edit: February 17, 2016, 08:50:57 AM by iowajes »

pbkmaine

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #21 on: February 17, 2016, 08:49:17 AM »
Seeing that someone went from a community college to a top school would be a plus, not a minus, for me. And I have done a lot of interviewing.

Gin1984

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #22 on: February 17, 2016, 08:50:17 AM »

Many employers now require your transcripts which then show the difference, at least in my experience.   

Maybe it's different if you transfer years in, but my transcript from my Bachelor's degrees shows "non-resident credit" and lists 2 courses from a community college and 8 courses I got AP credit from.  It doesn't say where the credit comes from, I just happen to know that.
I transferred years in and they included where.  It may have been my school as well.

Gin1984

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #23 on: February 17, 2016, 08:50:53 AM »
Seeing that someone went from a community college to a top school would be a plus, not a minus, for me. And I have done a lot of interviewing.
That very well may be true, but the attitude that no one will know, is the one I was objecting to.

Tetsuya Hondo

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #24 on: February 17, 2016, 09:07:37 AM »
Many employers now require your transcripts which then show the difference, at least in my experience.   

Unless it's a really small company, the only person that is likely to see this is HR. It's just a screen to ensure that you actually attended and graduated from the school. An HR goblin checks a box (among many) in the hiring program/checklist and forwards the resume and interviewing guide to the hiring manager who never sees it.

BeanCounter

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #25 on: February 17, 2016, 09:08:40 AM »
Seeing that someone went from a community college to a top school would be a plus, not a minus, for me. And I have done a lot of interviewing.
That very well may be true, but the attitude that no one will know, is the one I was objecting to.

Agree that you can't make absolutes, however I would venture to say that in MOST cases it doesn't matter if you transferred in. If your looking at a top program in a few very elite schools it very well might matter.
My experience is that it matters more what you do while you are in school. I went to a state business school with a very good co-op program. Most kids came out with jobs because of the connections they had made during their co-ops.
I really believe that higher ed is changing very a lot right now. And will likely continue to change. The undergrad degree means less. And people less willing to pay for private university and the "college experience".

Gin1984

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #26 on: February 17, 2016, 09:10:34 AM »
Many employers now require your transcripts which then show the difference, at least in my experience.   

Unless it's a really small company, the only person that is likely to see this is HR. It's just a screen to ensure that you actually attended and graduated from the school. An HR goblin checks a box (among many) in the hiring program/checklist and forwards the resume and interviewing guide to the hiring manager who never sees it.
Ironically HR here never saw my transcripts though they wanted the checkbox that I went.  My boss on the other hand, as well as one other person, for a different position, wanted my transcripts. 

AZDude

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #27 on: February 17, 2016, 09:41:46 AM »
2 years community college, transfer to preferably public university, but if she really wants the private one, then you still save $50K. The diploma wont even mention the community college and no one will ever know, other than you two. Your bank account and future self will thank you for not running up mountains of debt.

Even if you decide to ignore this advice, then I would suggest at the very least that you share the cost of her education. $50K home equity loan, $50K student loan. This should, in theory, make the education more personal to her and hopefully make her take it more seriously.
That is not accurate.

How so?

EDIT: Read thread and can see the small possibility of it affecting you, but is that edge case really worth $50K?
« Last Edit: February 17, 2016, 09:44:16 AM by AZDude »

Iron Mike Sharpe

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #28 on: February 17, 2016, 10:14:55 AM »
Is this for real?  Has the OP read anything on this site at all?

ysette9

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Re: Paying for my kid's private school
« Reply #29 on: February 17, 2016, 10:36:58 AM »
For what it is worth (I know, not much), I'll chime in with my experience since I have gone to junior college, public university, and private university.

My sister and I both went to junior college. Our local school is great and we both got scholarships that allowed us to go for free. Even if we hadn't gone for free, the price was really low and allowed us the low-stress time to explore academically to find something that was a good fit. I can't stress how important that was for us in the long run. Few 18-20 year olds really know what they want to study or what will be a lucrative career path.

After junior college I transferred to a state school, UC Berkeley. Granted, I live in California where our state school systems are good to great (we have two: California State University system and the University of California system). Our top schools, such as Berkeley, UCLA, rival many Ivy Leagues. After graduation I got a job as an engineer at a big company. I was told that my job offer was slightly higher because of the fact that I had graduated from a top school (junior college had zero influence here).

I later got a master's at a private university, Stanford (the company paid for that degree, thank god). I can honestly say that the quality of the education I got at junior college, Berkeley, and Stanford were all comparable though the prices were shockingly different. A friend of mine went to Stanford for both undergrad and grad (we did the same grad program) and our career paths have been remarkably similar. The difference between us is that she and her parents graduated with a bunch of debt from a very high-priced school while I graduated debt-free.

My own opinions from my experience include:
  • Personal drive, focus, and study habits matter a lot
  • Good public schools are excellent choices and should be your first choice
  • Junior college is a kick-ass way to save money, explore, and enjoy really small class sizes and personal attention from teachers
  • Price tag is NOT a measure of quality or how much you will get out of your education
  • Major selection is HUGELY important in what kind of return you will get out of your college investment

asauer

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #30 on: February 17, 2016, 12:41:38 PM »
OK, I'm getting ready to talk out of both sides of my mouth here:
1.  I'm all for private school if it's the right fit.  I went to a private all women's college and had the best experience of my life.  There's no way I would be where I am today without that school and its teachers.  Seriously.

2.  However, I am not in favor of pulling out money from something that can put one at risk.  This is how I did it without debt:
- have your daughter go to the library (or the interwebs) and look up every single scholarship known to man.  Apply for everything!  there are some really obscure ones that I received b/c nobody else applied!
- have your daughter get a PT job (work-study, off campus- whatever)- that $ goes to tuition
- consider a year or two at community college to save before transferring.  I actually worked full-time every summer and saved so I didn't need to do this but it's a legitimate course.


boarder42

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #31 on: February 17, 2016, 12:46:00 PM »
this is a trolling post.

guy has one post and its about paying 100k for a private school

why is this getting run.

I'm a red panda

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #32 on: February 17, 2016, 12:50:49 PM »

Ironically HR here never saw my transcripts though they wanted the checkbox that I went.  My boss on the other hand, as well as one other person, for a different position, wanted my transcripts.

I was only asked for my Bachelor's transcript in my first job. Every job after that has just believed my resume.  No one ever verified my Master's degree.

No one has ever asked to see a diploma- so the transcript is what matters unless you work in a field where it is traditional to hang it on the wall.

Undecided

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #33 on: February 17, 2016, 01:23:14 PM »
this is a trolling post.

guy has one post and its about paying 100k for a private school

why is this getting run.

My bet is that it's because the OP enjoys demonstrating that nobody will bother to try to answer his question unless they approve of the decisions on which the question is founded, and that instead the thread will quickly turn into the nth instance of beating one of the forum's favorite dead horses. Can't really say why the OP would enjoy that.

Scandium

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #34 on: February 18, 2016, 12:26:19 PM »
If going to a private school gets you just $10k higher salary that's $170,000 over 10 years, let alone a lifetime. Sounds like a good investment to me. I don't understand the hate for private schools. And I didn't even go to one. But I would never have gotten my job had I not gone to the specific pricy grad school.

Buying functionally identical for less money is smart. Buying something less for less money is not necessarily

ysette9

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Re: Paying for my kid's private school
« Reply #35 on: February 18, 2016, 12:53:20 PM »
I hear what you are saying, but I think you can get much more difference in starting salary and career earnings by choosing the right major and/or busting your butt to graduate with a high GPA (and thereby be attractive to companies able and willing to pay big bucks for the best talent).

MrsPete

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #36 on: February 20, 2016, 08:29:41 AM »
Many private colleges offer scholarships that can make it for some people less expensive than state schools. Do that.  Maybe you won't get anything, but you certainly won't if you just assume you aren't going to.
As a teacher who's worked with high school seniors for years, I can assure you this is an urban legend.  It used to happen occasionally, but it was never a truism.  Typically a private school offers the tip-top students enough money that the cost is close enough to the state school's price that it's reasonable to consider it.  It's been YEARS since I knew of a student getting a private school price lower than a state school price. 

If you're hoping to find this situation for yourself, TRY.  Maybe it'll work somewhere for someone, but at the same time, apply for an affordable state school too.   

Typical situation:  My older child had truly exceptional grades in high school -- plus loads of extras.  She was the prime scholarship candidate.  One particular private school tried hard to recruit her; they offered her 16K.  Sounds nice, huh?  Except that their pricetag was 35K, and the state school that she really wanted was just under 14K.  So, yeah, the private school offered her a nice scholarship ... but since their pricetag was so high to start with, the state school was still the better price point.  And the state school has a MUCH stronger academic record.  She's had a great experience at the state school and will be graduating in a few months. 

2 years community college, transfer to preferably public university, but if she really wants the private one, then you still save $50K. The diploma wont even mention the community college and no one will ever know, other than you two. Your bank account and future self will thank you for not running up mountains of debt.
My youngest chose to begin at community college, and while it was the right choice for her -- she wasn't ready to leave home -- it has been a second-rate choice.  It's "lesser" in many ways:  Fewer classes from which to choose, Calculus not offered this semester, trouble registering, no advisor, and many of her classmates are simply not college material ... the list could go on.  My older child, who went straight to a university, had more opportunities as a freshman.  I can't say I regret the community college choice for my youngest because, as I said, it was the right choice for her emotionally, but I do wish the circumstances had been different.

Having said that, I don't anticipate any problem with transferring her credits.  I know it was a problem in the past, but today you can check online BEFORE you take the class and know exactly which classes will transfer /which ones will transfer in only as elective credits /which ones are a total waste.  You do need to know to which school you plan to transfer because all schools don't treat things equally, but the tools are easily available online to allow you to "do your homework".

If I had gone to state school, that would have been partying hard, hanging with the high school crew and likely getting involved with drugs. The private school I went to was very strict during the week.  Most of my peers were very academically ambitious and wanted to study during the week and party on the weekends only. 
As a lawyer, you should surely recognize the fallacy here!  You experienced the private school, but you're making assumptions about what the state schools were like.  You can't possibly know what your experience would've been like or how your life would've been like if you'd chosen a different path. 

Having attended a state school, I can tell you that my experience was much like your description:  Most of my peers were serious about their education and studied hard during the week.  The dorms were quiet as a mouse Sunday night - Thursday night.  And on weekends it was a wild place.  Yes, we had some students who didn't fit into this mold, but they were the "one semester wonders", the students who ended up leaving because they weren't cutting it academically. 

Incidentally, my husband always lived off-campus, and he had a similar impression of on-campus living:  He visited the dorms only on weekends, so he had the idea that the dorms were always rather loud, filled with people just hanging out and talking, and lots of drinking.  He never saw a typical Monday night in a dorm:  Lots of people reading, a group in one study room quizzing each other for an upcoming Chemistry test, someone typing a paper in another study room.

Many employers now require your transcripts which then show the difference, at least in my experience.   
Eh, I've never heard of this.  I know that my college senior hasn't been asked to share her transcript.  We talked about it:  Her transcript is very strong, and she's sorry she can't wave it around like a flag.

I don't understand the hate for private schools ... Buying functionally identical for less money is smart.
It's not hate for private schools -- it's that they cost so much more and, for most people, offers nothing extra in the long run. 

In fact, in my state -- and I know this isn't a typical situation -- our state universities are very strong, while our private college are lackluster.  The students who end up attending private schools (with two big exceptions) are the weaker students.  When my oldest was choosing colleges, we toured loads of places, and I remember one really bad experience at a private school:  Our tour guide spouted flat-out incorrect information about the state schools in an attempt to make her school look better; since I never really know when to keep my mouth shut, I called her on it (yes, in front of other parents and potential students).  And her speech was horrible; I mean, she had poor subject-verb agreement.  I hope she was the exception rather than the rule, but I did write a letter to the admissions office the next week in which I described her presentation to us /how it was an absolute negative for their school.  The really bad thing:  This girl was an education major; she's going to talk to students with her horrible English.  Well, I don't actually know that she was an education major progressing towards graduation. 
« Last Edit: February 20, 2016, 08:47:02 AM by MrsPete »

LeRainDrop

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #37 on: February 20, 2016, 09:12:02 AM »
Many employers now require your transcripts which then show the difference, at least in my experience.   
Eh, I've never heard of this.  I know that my college senior hasn't been asked to share her transcript.  We talked about it:  Her transcript is very strong, and she's sorry she can't wave it around like a flag.

Depending on what the student wants to do after college graduation, the transcript issue may or may not make a difference.  For example, I worked for one year after college and did not need to provide my transcript for that job.  But at the same time, I was applying for law school, and my college transcript certainly was submitted and considered for that -- possibly both for purposes of admission and academic scholarship award.

I'm a red panda

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #38 on: February 20, 2016, 09:43:09 AM »
Many private colleges offer scholarships that can make it for some people less expensive than state schools. Do that.  Maybe you won't get anything, but you certainly won't if you just assume you aren't going to.
As a teacher who's worked with high school seniors for years, I can assure you this is an urban legend.  It used to happen occasionally, but it was never a truism.  Typically a private school offers the tip-top students enough money that the cost is close enough to the state school's price that it's reasonable to consider it.  It's been YEARS since I knew of a student getting a private school price lower than a state school price. 


I also volunteer with high school seniors, who are very low income.  I've seen this happen multiple times.  Possibly it is because the students are SO low income.  Maybe there is a gap to more average incomes where the help is not there.

I went to public school. If I have kids I would encourage them to as well. But I took the OP's comment to mean his daughter IS going to that school- so I didn't comment at all on continuing searching.  But to just assume you won't get any help is a mistake; you should always at least apply.

If the OP's daughter is still looking for schools- I'd highly recommend looking at public schools.

vhalros

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #39 on: February 20, 2016, 09:54:13 AM »
Many private colleges offer scholarships that can make it for some people less expensive than state schools. Do that.  Maybe you won't get anything, but you certainly won't if you just assume you aren't going to.
As a teacher who's worked with high school seniors for years, I can assure you this is an urban legend.  It used to happen occasionally, but it was never a truism.  Typically a private school offers the tip-top students enough money that the cost is close enough to the state school's price that it's reasonable to consider it.  It's been YEARS since I knew of a student getting a private school price lower than a state school price. 


It's been over a decade since I was in college, but this definitely happened to me. It probably varies a lot by state; I lived in New Hampshire and got accepted to University of NH, but it would have been more expensive than a number of private colleges I also got accepted to. This is probably because New Hampshire doesn't like to fund stuff.

MrsPete

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #40 on: February 20, 2016, 10:04:46 AM »
Depending on what the student wants to do after college graduation, the transcript issue may or may not make a difference.  For example, I worked for one year after college and did not need to provide my transcript for that job.  But at the same time, I was applying for law school, and my college transcript certainly was submitted and considered for that -- possibly both for purposes of admission and academic scholarship award.
Well of course a transcript is required for further education!  The topic was whether it's needed when applying for a job.

Goldielocks

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #41 on: February 20, 2016, 10:06:10 AM »
Many private colleges offer scholarships that can make it for some people less expensive than state schools. Do that.  Maybe you won't get anything, but you certainly won't if you just assume you aren't going to.
As a teacher who's worked with high school seniors for years, I can assure you this is an urban legend.  It used to happen occasionally, but it was never a truism.  Typically a private school offers the tip-top students enough money that the cost is close enough to the state school's price that it's reasonable to consider it.  It's been YEARS since I knew of a student getting a private school price lower than a state school price. 


I also volunteer with high school seniors, who are very low income.  I've seen this happen multiple times.  Possibly it is because the students are SO low income.  Maybe there is a gap to more average incomes where the help is not there.


Iowajes,   a bursary is not the same as a scholarship.  It is the same here, low income qualifies for many bursaries and subsidized loans.  Income under $35k per year get a lot, nearly full subsidy.  Income over $60k (or having RRSP retirement savings) is SOL.  In between these incomes are subsidized loans and assistance up to 50% of the costs.

lhamo

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #42 on: February 20, 2016, 12:34:29 PM »
The bursary concept/terminology is not typically used in the US.  Here scholarship is the default term, and it can be broken down into need-based scholarships (sometimes categorized under financial aid, which also typically will include loans) and merit scholarships (which sometimes also are offered only to those with demonstrated financial need).

Confused yet?  Yeah -- it would probably be easier for us to add the bursary concept/terminology to our mix, but I've personally never seen it used in the US. 

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #43 on: February 20, 2016, 01:44:07 PM »

Iowajes,   a bursary is not the same as a scholarship.  It is the same here, low income qualifies for many bursaries and subsidized loans.  Income under $35k per year get a lot, nearly full subsidy.  Income over $60k (or having RRSP retirement savings) is SOL.  In between these incomes are subsidized loans and assistance up to 50% of the costs.

I don't know what a bursary is. These were all scholarships. Some were from the school, some were from private organizations. (I had the kids apply to everything and anything; a lot of small scholarships are won only by those who are able to FIND them. There is so much random stuff out there. Even if it's only $500, that $500 helps.)

Yes, there are some scholarships only low income can get- but you still have to apply for them; and many people don't, just assuming private school will be too expensive.

LeRainDrop

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #44 on: February 20, 2016, 03:12:03 PM »
Depending on what the student wants to do after college graduation, the transcript issue may or may not make a difference.  For example, I worked for one year after college and did not need to provide my transcript for that job.  But at the same time, I was applying for law school, and my college transcript certainly was submitted and considered for that -- possibly both for purposes of admission and academic scholarship award.
Well of course a transcript is required for further education!  The topic was whether it's needed when applying for a job.

What's the point of your comment -- to make me feel stupid?  As most of us probably know, it's very common for kids in college to change their major and career plans.  Where my comment came from is simply to consider that the student may originally anticipate ending their education after college, but then while studying, realize that they want to attend some post-graduate program.

MrsPete

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #45 on: February 20, 2016, 06:02:48 PM »
Depending on what the student wants to do after college graduation, the transcript issue may or may not make a difference.  For example, I worked for one year after college and did not need to provide my transcript for that job.  But at the same time, I was applying for law school, and my college transcript certainly was submitted and considered for that -- possibly both for purposes of admission and academic scholarship award.
Well of course a transcript is required for further education!  The topic was whether it's needed when applying for a job.

What's the point of your comment -- to make me feel stupid?  As most of us probably know, it's very common for kids in college to change their major and career plans.  Where my comment came from is simply to consider that the student may originally anticipate ending their education after college, but then while studying, realize that they want to attend some post-graduate program.
I thought it was a discussion about college expenses, which splintered into transfer credits and whether interviewers look at your transcript.  I cannot follow your point about changing majors. 

LeRainDrop

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #46 on: February 20, 2016, 06:33:54 PM »
Depending on what the student wants to do after college graduation, the transcript issue may or may not make a difference.  For example, I worked for one year after college and did not need to provide my transcript for that job.  But at the same time, I was applying for law school, and my college transcript certainly was submitted and considered for that -- possibly both for purposes of admission and academic scholarship award.
Well of course a transcript is required for further education!  The topic was whether it's needed when applying for a job.

What's the point of your comment -- to make me feel stupid?  As most of us probably know, it's very common for kids in college to change their major and career plans.  Where my comment came from is simply to consider that the student may originally anticipate ending their education after college, but then while studying, realize that they want to attend some post-graduate program.
I thought it was a discussion about college expenses, which splintered into transfer credits and whether interviewers look at your transcript.  I cannot follow your point about changing majors.

It's quite straight-forward.  You just need to think chronologically.

When a high school student begins college, they typically do not know *precisely* what field and job they will want to go into upon graduation.  Many of them start thinking they'll pursue one major and end up changing into another; many of them assume the BA/BS will be all they want, but then later decide to go into a grad program.  Thus, in the same way the high school student might question whether a future employer would look at her transcript ans see the college transfer, in the interest of keeping her options open, she should also consider that she may end up applying to a grad program 4+ years down the road, where the program would definitely consider her college transcript.

Essentially, someone said be careful about college transfer because employers may see that on your transcript.  Someone else said employers don't look at your college transcript.  And I'm saying employment straight out of college is not the only path; if that student chooses continuing education as a path, the grad program will look at the college transcript.  Do you know for a fact that the OP's daughter will never apply to a graduate program?  No, so the fact that a grad program would look at the student's college transcript is relevant to the topic of this thread (even if not relevant to the subtopic in your own mind).
« Last Edit: February 20, 2016, 06:39:58 PM by LeRainDrop »

tobitonic

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #47 on: February 20, 2016, 07:24:24 PM »
Many employers now require your transcripts which then show the difference, at least in my experience.   
Eh, I've never heard of this.  I know that my college senior hasn't been asked to share her transcript.  We talked about it:  Her transcript is very strong, and she's sorry she can't wave it around like a flag.


You are wrong. Gin1984 is right.

I'm in education, and have been asked for my transcripts in pretty much every teaching job I've ever had--private, public, and low-income public. They each wanted *all* my transcripts - everything undergraduate, everything graduate. In my current job, I'm getting paid about 12k more per year simply *because* I could supply additional transcripts showing the additional credits I'd obtained in the past beyond my bachelor's degree.

AlwaysLearninginPA

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #48 on: February 20, 2016, 07:27:52 PM »
I can't advise you on the money situation, but just for an anecdotal tale...

I was a very top-ranking high school student. I was under the impression that I could not go to college if I could not get a full scholarship, and I desperately wanted to go to college, so I worked as hard as I possibly could in high school.

I applied for many, many scholarships. You would be amazed how many there are from private organizations and local governments.

Of the colleges I applied to, I received the highest possible scholarship from every single one. Only one of those was complete full tuition. Most private schools, at least in my experience, don't even offer full tuition scholarships. They may do other things for financial aid reasons, but I did not qualify for that kind of aid and even if I did qualify for extensive loans, my parents were in no position to co-sign for that.

I did not want to go to that school, but that is what I did. It was a private school, but barely. I got an excellent education and as a bonus, I met my husband, who also got an excellent education in a tech major that often doesn't tailor to individual students. And then I got offered an assistantship for my master's degree that covered all my living and tuition expenses. On top of that, I applied for and received scholarships from the state for grad school.

I paid off my student loans within a few months of graduating. I am forever grateful that I was not given the choice to rack up intense amounts of debt for my education. Money is out there for the taking--I would encourage your daughter to go after it! Especially if her school is in-state.

Also, I would be heartbroken if my college education costs put a financial strain on my parents. That would be an incredible guilt I would carry with me, and a lot of pressure for an 18-20 year old who might change their mind once they graduate.

If it isn't a burden to you, however, then a lot of this is irrelevant. Just another thought to consider.

Best of luck to you!

tobitonic

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Re: Paying for my kids private school
« Reply #49 on: February 20, 2016, 07:33:06 PM »
this is a trolling post.

guy has one post and its about paying 100k for a private school

why is this getting run.

My bet is that it's because the OP enjoys demonstrating that nobody will bother to try to answer his question unless they approve of the decisions on which the question is founded, and that instead the thread will quickly turn into the nth instance of beating one of the forum's favorite dead horses. Can't really say why the OP would enjoy that.

Hear hear. So much dogma in this thread and so few people actually answering the OP's question. He didn't ask whether it was a good idea for his daughter to go to private school or not. He didn't ask whether private schools were wastes of money compared to public schools or not. He didn't ask whether private schools led to higher paying jobs or not. The only thing he asked, if I read his post correctly (and I presume most here were also capable of doing so), was whether to pursue a HELOC or not.

OP, I wouldn't do it that way because you're risking your home. I'd fill out the FAFSA if you haven't done so already and do my best to save enough each year to meet the EFC, and have her take loans out for the rest, which I'd work to aggressively pay down together (perhaps working out a repayment plan?). However, if the EFC were far out of reach, I'd also try to counsel her into a cheaper school, private or public.