Author Topic: Overcoming imposter syndrome  (Read 1456 times)

The 585

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Overcoming imposter syndrome
« on: March 09, 2022, 07:08:16 PM »
After taking almost a year off from working, I recently accepted a new job which will move me to a great area in a new country and earn the highest salary I've ever made. However I'm having a strong case of imposter syndrome and feeling like I'm not going to be good enough. The interview with the manager was very short, didn't provide many specifics about the work, but told me based on my resume it's a no-brainer and I'm a great fit for the job.

I meet the relevant experience and education requirements for the job but it seems much more IT-focused than what my experience is. There are several "desired skills" in the job description that I DON'T have. On the postive side, I see this as a growth role where my compensation is higher than ever, discovering a new part of the world, and learning many new tools and concepts I haven't been exposed to in previous roles.

But what if I show up and have no idea what I'm doing? My fear is being thrown directly into projects that are way above my head and feeling helpless. How do I overcome this imposter syndrome and fear of the unknown? Thanks in advance!

SwordGuy

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Re: Overcoming imposter syndrome
« Reply #1 on: March 09, 2022, 07:16:26 PM »
After taking almost a year off from working, I recently accepted a new job which will move me to a great area in a new country and earn the highest salary I've ever made. However I'm having a strong case of imposter syndrome and feeling like I'm not going to be good enough. The interview with the manager was very short, didn't provide many specifics about the work, but told me based on my resume it's a no-brainer and I'm a great fit for the job.

I meet the relevant experience and education requirements for the job but it seems much more IT-focused than what my experience is. There are several "desired skills" in the job description that I DON'T have. On the postive side, I see this as a growth role where my compensation is higher than ever, discovering a new part of the world, and learning many new tools and concepts I haven't been exposed to in previous roles.

But what if I show up and have no idea what I'm doing? My fear is being thrown directly into projects that are way above my head and feeling helpless. How do I overcome this imposter syndrome and fear of the unknown? Thanks in advance!

If those "desired skills" were essential to you succeeding, they would be "required skills".

And remember that half of all people are dumber than average*, and half of all people are less capable than average*, and yet most manage to keep their jobs.  :)

So chill.   Relax.

You'll either be a rock star or you'll muddle thru like most everyone else does, and either way, you'll end up with those skills and a better paycheck.

*Technically I should say median instead of average, but more than half the folks would think I'm talking about a dividing strip in a road...

gooki

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Re: Overcoming imposter syndrome
« Reply #2 on: March 09, 2022, 08:42:00 PM »
Fake it until you make it. That's what ever other imposter is doing. And trust me there's a lot of us out there.

Seriously believe in yourself. You're awesome and if you get to a place where you have no idea what you're doing, your awesome self will find a way through, wether that's admitting you don't know and getting help, taking more time, or learning everything you can, etc etc.

The 585

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Re: Overcoming imposter syndrome
« Reply #3 on: March 10, 2022, 10:25:51 AM »
After taking almost a year off from working, I recently accepted a new job which will move me to a great area in a new country and earn the highest salary I've ever made. However I'm having a strong case of imposter syndrome and feeling like I'm not going to be good enough. The interview with the manager was very short, didn't provide many specifics about the work, but told me based on my resume it's a no-brainer and I'm a great fit for the job.

I meet the relevant experience and education requirements for the job but it seems much more IT-focused than what my experience is. There are several "desired skills" in the job description that I DON'T have. On the postive side, I see this as a growth role where my compensation is higher than ever, discovering a new part of the world, and learning many new tools and concepts I haven't been exposed to in previous roles.

But what if I show up and have no idea what I'm doing? My fear is being thrown directly into projects that are way above my head and feeling helpless. How do I overcome this imposter syndrome and fear of the unknown? Thanks in advance!

If those "desired skills" were essential to you succeeding, they would be "required skills".

And remember that half of all people are dumber than average*, and half of all people are less capable than average*, and yet most manage to keep their jobs.  :)

So chill.   Relax.

You'll either be a rock star or you'll muddle thru like most everyone else does, and either way, you'll end up with those skills and a better paycheck.

*Technically I should say median instead of average, but more than half the folks would think I'm talking about a dividing strip in a road...

HA good points! Thank you! I consider myself to be pretty ambitious and motivated (but someone who worries), so hopefully I'm on the smart side of that dividing strip in the road :)

The 585

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Re: Overcoming imposter syndrome
« Reply #4 on: March 10, 2022, 10:27:38 AM »
Fake it until you make it. That's what ever other imposter is doing. And trust me there's a lot of us out there.

Seriously believe in yourself. You're awesome and if you get to a place where you have no idea what you're doing, your awesome self will find a way through, wether that's admitting you don't know and getting help, taking more time, or learning everything you can, etc etc.

YES exactly... "fake it until you make it"... this is a mantra I need to adopt and live by in order to worry less. I think the problem is I care too much most of the time about what others think about me.

SunnyDays

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Re: Overcoming imposter syndrome
« Reply #5 on: March 10, 2022, 10:29:57 AM »
The only thing worse for your new colleagues, besides having to get used to a new person, is a new person who thinks they know everything.  Just be upfront - admit what you don't know and ask for others' advice.  Tell them you're in a learning curve, and need them to help you learn.  That is the sign of a secure person.

Laura33

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Re: Overcoming imposter syndrome
« Reply #6 on: March 10, 2022, 12:06:48 PM »
Perhaps you wouldn't worry so much about whether you can manage the new job if you were confident that things would turn out ok if you can't?  The fear often isn't so much about X, it's about the sequence of horribles that X triggers in your brain (which usually ends with me sleeping on a park bench).  How about focusing on (i) the benefits you will receive even if the job crashes and burns, and (ii) all of the different things you will be able to do to get back on track if the job doesn't work out? 

On (i), you'll get to try a cool new part of the country; you'll get to stretch your wings and learn some new skills; you'll get to make new friends and try a new lifestyle; you'll make a shit-ton of money that can springboard you towards FIRE (and at a minimum becomes your base for your next job); etc.  In particular, realize that learning you hate something or suck at it can often be just as valuable as the opposite (my "best" college summer job was the one that clearly demonstrated to me why I was not meant to be a professor).  Even crashing and burning, while damned uncomfortable at the time, can teach some really valuable lessons for the long term.

On (ii), you've got savings; your job will give you the opportunity for more savings; you will have new skills to put on your resume to help you get the next job; you will in all likelihood meet at least one person there who thinks well of you and is happy to serve as a reference/help you network; you have a bunch of other skills that you could tap for future jobs, which allows you to cast a wide net; you have low expenses because you're a Mustachian and thus don't actually need to make a shit-ton of money to manage; etc. etc. etc.  IOW, you already have like 73 layers of protection between you and that park bench, and even a failed job will very likely give you even more tools to build an even more secure future, despite the short-term setbacks.

FWIW, most people significantly overestimate the amount of intelligence and skills required for a given job.  I mean, if you're a quant at a big hedge fund, yeah, you need to be wicked smart and really fucking good at quant-ing.  But most jobs tend to work out pretty well if you know the basics, are able/willing to learn more as needed, and generally act like a grown-up and play nice with others.  So I'm actually pretty confident that you'll do just fine.  But as a fellow sufferer for many years, I understand that just telling yourself everything will be fine doesn't cut it, because you just cannot possibly have an objective view of your own skills and abilities.  So instead of worrying about the job -- or even about "curing" yourself of imposter syndrome -- train that big brain of yours to provide off-ramps into reality when the Death Spiral of Panic starts.

Askel

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Re: Overcoming imposter syndrome
« Reply #7 on: March 10, 2022, 12:08:05 PM »
Embrace it! 

SwordGuy

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Re: Overcoming imposter syndrome
« Reply #8 on: March 10, 2022, 01:25:44 PM »
After taking almost a year off from working, I recently accepted a new job which will move me to a great area in a new country and earn the highest salary I've ever made. However I'm having a strong case of imposter syndrome and feeling like I'm not going to be good enough. The interview with the manager was very short, didn't provide many specifics about the work, but told me based on my resume it's a no-brainer and I'm a great fit for the job.

I meet the relevant experience and education requirements for the job but it seems much more IT-focused than what my experience is. There are several "desired skills" in the job description that I DON'T have. On the postive side, I see this as a growth role where my compensation is higher than ever, discovering a new part of the world, and learning many new tools and concepts I haven't been exposed to in previous roles.

But what if I show up and have no idea what I'm doing? My fear is being thrown directly into projects that are way above my head and feeling helpless. How do I overcome this imposter syndrome and fear of the unknown? Thanks in advance!

If those "desired skills" were essential to you succeeding, they would be "required skills".

And remember that half of all people are dumber than average*, and half of all people are less capable than average*, and yet most manage to keep their jobs.  :)

So chill.   Relax.

You'll either be a rock star or you'll muddle thru like most everyone else does, and either way, you'll end up with those skills and a better paycheck.

*Technically I should say median instead of average, but more than half the folks would think I'm talking about a dividing strip in a road...

HA good points! Thank you! I consider myself to be pretty ambitious and motivated (but someone who worries), so hopefully I'm on the smart side of that dividing strip in the road :)

Well, the good news is you're clearly NOT a member of the Dunning-Kruger club -- because they're always sure they know it all.

zolotiyeruki

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Re: Overcoming imposter syndrome
« Reply #9 on: March 10, 2022, 03:10:07 PM »
The only thing worse for your new colleagues, besides having to get used to a new person, is a new person who thinks they know everything.  Just be upfront - admit what you don't know and ask for others' advice.  Tell them you're in a learning curve, and need them to help you learn.  That is the sign of a secure person.
This.  The ability and willingness to dive in, learn new skills, and work hard will easily overcome any initial lack of the precise skills needed for a job.  New hires are expected to take time to climb the learning curve.

use2betrix

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Re: Overcoming imposter syndrome
« Reply #10 on: March 10, 2022, 06:07:01 PM »
I’m a total imposter and I’ve had a killer career that has excelled faster than anyone I know in my industry (considering my age). I’m currently a high level manager on a project of several thousand people. Probably in the top 10 people org wise and likely moreso pay-wise. I’m 34 years old.

With all that in mind, there’s a TON of technical stuff I don’t know (but probably should), just based on my overall experience/age.

You can also:
Come in early, stay late, take a short lunch (all within reason)
Ask good questions (to the right people) - don’t show what you don’t know to the ‘wrong’ people
If you’re asked a direct question others know the answer to - be honest and say you’ll find out
Work harder than everyone around you
Volunteer to take meeting minutes (not me, but people admire those that do lol)
Constantly find new ways to add value, even if sometimes outside your specific responsibilities. Managers love people who can be proactive to add value (in the right ways)
Build good relationships with the right people.

Unless you’re terribly unqualified, don’t sweat it one bit. If you can bust your butt, try and tackle many of those things above, you can still be a rockstar.

The 585

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Re: Overcoming imposter syndrome
« Reply #11 on: March 13, 2022, 11:11:38 AM »
Thanks for all the great advice!

Specifically regarding my feeling underqualified... my prior work experience was in the same general field, but mostly doing mindless busy work and data entry tasks, so I didn't really learn a lot of groundbreaking stuff. The "interview" was basically just a quick call from the manager who said I'm a perfect fit for the role, with very few questions or information. The job seems much more IT and focused than what I've been exposed to previously. I'll be expected to use tools and skills that I haven't used before -- but also weren't on my resume anyways.

On the bright side, sink or swim will force me to get up to speed on new tools real quick. I just don't want to embarass myself or get super stressed in the meantime :(

 

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