Author Topic: No idea what I want in life  (Read 5599 times)

Murse

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No idea what I want in life
« on: November 06, 2014, 08:23:03 AM »
I am struggling to figure out what I want from life. I am currently a nursing student about to graduate in June (if I can survive) and I am struggling to figure out what I want from life. When I graduated high school life was great, no idea about money, my focus was just on enjoying life while living with my parents. Then fall term came about and I was told to go to school or move out. I decided school would be fine. First term was a waste, I had no idea what to do, because both of my parents are nurses I started on the pre-reqs and got into the program. I always had this idea that I would get my associates degree and be done. Well what happened was I found out nurses can get into jobs that pay more (nurse practitioners or anesthetists) and my then consumerist mind thought that would be great! Well I tossed the idea back and forth (while tossing this idea around I came across MMM and fire) and I still don't know what I want. On top of this, I recently found out my parents who are nurse managers have payscales above what the NPs are paid. I think I fell in love with the NP idea because of the pay and the idea of getting away from the dirty work but that is kind of out the window now that I have seen where my parents are as far as pay and they don't have to do the dirty work either. On top of that, they both have associates degrees which means less school, so less debt from school (as well as opportunity costs associated with going to school instead of working.)

here's the deal, all I really know is that I hate school and want to enjoy life again. A large part of my problem is that I am still living with my parents and don't have a job. I have no idea in the world how much my expenses will be, or how much I can save. I really like the idea of FI but I have no idea about how I feel about RE. Logically, I don't think I can have any of these questions answered until I live on my own and have a job. I need advice please!


skunkfunk

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Re: No idea what I want in life
« Reply #1 on: November 06, 2014, 08:29:08 AM »
Have you considered becoming an EMT or some other kind of public servant? State and large city jobs usually pay pretty well with great benefits. College is NOT for everybody. My brother, for instance, hated school and got his entire degree anyway. Very big regrets for him as he now doesn't even want to look in his own field.

You can always go back later if you get the itch. If you hate school, your chances of finishing and enjoying what you wind up in are quite low, in my opinion.

Murse

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Re: No idea what I want in life
« Reply #2 on: November 06, 2014, 08:34:24 AM »
Have you considered becoming an EMT or some other kind of public servant? State and large city jobs usually pay pretty well with great benefits. College is NOT for everybody. My brother, for instance, hated school and got his entire degree anyway. Very big regrets for him as he now doesn't even want to look in his own field.

You can always go back later if you get the itch. If you hate school, your chances of finishing and enjoying what you wind up in are quite low, in my opinion.

Thank you for the response but quitting school is not an option I am entertaining. It is more of a after school do I go on for more school/debt because I think I might enjoy the position better? It is also a question of if my expenses will be low enough to Be FI in a short amount of time (which no one can answer.) But I suppose your point is still valid, if I hate school then why continue past where I will finish in June, thanks.

Future Lazy

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Re: No idea what I want in life
« Reply #3 on: November 06, 2014, 08:36:40 AM »
For your consideration:

http://www.mrmoneymustache.com/2013/07/25/50-jobs-over-50000-without-a-degree-part-1/
http://www.mrmoneymustache.com/2013/08/05/50-jobs-over-50000-without-a-degree-part-2/

And that list certainly isn't exhaustive.

If you only hate the school part, and don't hate the nursing part, through, stick with it for now, since it's currently your best option for getting a job with decent pay.

You're still probably looking at living with your parents for 8-12 months even after getting a job so you can build up an emergency fund and First, Last and Deposit on someplace to rent.

begood

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Re: No idea what I want in life
« Reply #4 on: November 06, 2014, 08:42:07 AM »
Another possibility for nursing without the dirty work:

My niece is currently in the middle of a clinical nursing leader program:

http://www.gru.edu/nursing/cnl.php

She started school planning on doing nursing, then switched to physical therapy. She figured out along the way that nursing administration might be a better choice for her than direct patient care.



Murse

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Re: No idea what I want in life
« Reply #5 on: November 06, 2014, 08:46:38 AM »
For your consideration:

http://www.mrmoneymustache.com/2013/07/25/50-jobs-over-50000-without-a-degree-part-1/
http://www.mrmoneymustache.com/2013/08/05/50-jobs-over-50000-without-a-degree-part-2/

And that list certainly isn't exhaustive.

If you only hate the school part, and don't hate the nursing part, through, stick with it for now, since it's currently your best option for getting a job with decent pay.

You're still probably looking at living with your parents for 8-12 months even after getting a job so you can build up an emergency fund and First, Last and Deposit on someplace to rent.

Thank you Kayla, I appreciate your insight. It's the school part I hate (I am fairly certain.) I am so obsessed with money now that I want to be sure I can make it work. And to begood my parents have done it with only an associates degree in nursing (working for the state.)

Gone Fishing

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Re: No idea what I want in life
« Reply #6 on: November 06, 2014, 08:57:16 AM »
Not to say there was no joy in my life at the time, but the years between about 18-30 were covered with doubt and worry about how my life would turn out. For the most part, I kept my head down, saved all I could, took advantage of opportunites to get ahead when they came.  Once I saw FI was a reality, I felt much more in control, as I realized I had the means and the ability to direct my life in the direction I wanted.

As far as employment goes, it is still a tough world out there, employers are sqeezing everything they can out of their staff and will continue to do so until the job market opens up to the point where people can easily jump ship if they don't like the expectations.  Not to say it doesn't happen, but I think they idea of a 20 something landing their "dream job" and being fully satisfied with their life is a bit of a stretch.  My advice is to find something that interests you somewhat, pays decently, and will be tolerable for the next 10 years or so then go for it, and don't give up, no matter what, unless you have a better opportunity that will yield immediate benefits.  For the next ten years, don't focus on enjoying your life, focus on enjoying the rest of your life.       

Murse

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Re: No idea what I want in life
« Reply #7 on: November 06, 2014, 09:10:07 AM »
Not to say there was no joy in my life at the time, but the years between about 18-30 were covered with doubt and worry about how my life would turn out. For the most part, I kept my head down, saved all I could, took advantage of opportunites to get ahead when they came.  Once I saw FI was a reality, I felt much more in control, as I realized I had the means and the ability to direct my life in the direction I wanted.

As far as employment goes, it is still a tough world out there, employers are sqeezing everything they can out of their staff and will continue to do so until the job market opens up to the point where people can easily jump ship if they don't like the expectations.  Not to say it doesn't happen, but I think they idea of a 20 something landing their "dream job" and being fully satisfied with their life is a bit of a stretch.  My advice is to find something that interests you somewhat, pays decently, and will be tolerable for the next 10 years or so then go for it, and don't give up, no matter what, unless you have a better opportunity that will yield immediate benefits.  For the next ten years, don't focus on enjoying your life, focus on enjoying the rest of your life.     

Thank you for the feedback so close!

Dicey

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Re: No idea what I want in life
« Reply #8 on: November 06, 2014, 09:40:11 AM »
I'd start with this: Bloom where you're planted, baby. Right now you're in school and you need to figure out how to enjoy it. Next you need to figure out a facet of nursing that appeals to you. There will be scores of options available to you once you've completed your degree. Since you're young and single, I'd consider some kind of travel/nursing option that includes housing costs.

The beauty of becoming an adult is you get to figure all of this out on your own. It's incredibly powerful, but all I hear is you mewing like a kitten. This is understandable to a very limited extent, but is not going to get you to your goals. It's kind of like an overweight person wanting to wake up in the morning twenty pounds lighter. Won't happen overnight or by any amount of wishing or whining. It will happen with baby steps, taken over and over and over. You need to start taking baby steps toward your future, sister. You are facing a wealth of opportunities to create the life you want. Expecting to get there without putting in some deep thought and effort is not going to cut it.

If you want to be FI, starting in a well-paying career early, keeping expenses low and managing your wants (hint, hint) plus saving and investing are the way to get there. You are being given a golden chance to do all of this. Don't squander it because your life isn't "fun" right now.

juuustin

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Re: No idea what I want in life
« Reply #9 on: November 06, 2014, 09:53:34 AM »
My wife is a (happy) nurse and I have had many late night career discussions with her so I know a thing or two.  First and foremost, an associate's degree as the only degree needed to get a good nursing job is on the way to extinction.  I am not sure where you are, but in Baltimore (shockingly large amount of prestigious hospitals), a BSN is the minimum education needed to get an RN job.  Sure, there are still county and rural hospitals that accept AA's, but the pay is 20% lower at least.  I know that isn't what you want to hear, but your parents, especially as nurse managers, are the exception, not the rule right now.

In the same mold as RNs now needing a BSN instead of just an AA, many of the highly sought after NP Programs are now transitioning to Doctoral degrees instead of the Masters programs that used to be required.  Simply put, there is a zero percent chance that you can even get into an NP program without a Bachelor's.

Now, in regards to the salary difference I mentioned previously.  Again, this is completely dependent on the hospital and the area.  My wife's salary (3rd year BSN, RN) is $66,000 for 36 hour weeks.  This includes diff and night pay.  She works in a PICU so her skills are highly specialized and they obviously pay more for that, but a similar RN position at a rural county hospital that only requires an AA might start at $45,000 tops.  She has recently been offered a Clinical Leader position (one step below manager) and the pay increase is roughly $20,000.  Her manager easily clears $100,000 but her hospital requires a Master's for that position.

Feel free to ask me any specific questions and I can relay them to her.  She has a pretty good handle on the educational scene because she teaches clinicals at her alma mater.

Murse

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Re: No idea what I want in life
« Reply #10 on: November 06, 2014, 10:28:59 AM »
Thanks for the response to both of you. I am aware of the Opportunity hold ups for asn degrees are you are correct as far as the private sector. My parents both work for the public sector. In the public sector they are on equal footing as far as opportunities (for my area,) it's just bsn's get 5% more then asn's, however when/if you get into management all managers are on the same pay scale. But you are right that if I want any chance of working in the private sector I will have to get a BSN, and for management an msn. Does your wife have regrets in the profession?

juuustin

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Re: No idea what I want in life
« Reply #11 on: November 06, 2014, 10:41:33 AM »
Thanks for the response to both of you. I am aware of the Opportunity hold ups for asn degrees are you are correct as far as the private sector. My parents both work for the public sector. In the public sector they are on equal footing as far as opportunities (for my area,) it's just bsn's get 5% more then asn's, however when/if you get into management all managers are on the same pay scale. But you are right that if I want any chance of working in the private sector I will have to get a BSN, and for management an msn. Does your wife have regrets in the profession?
Even the public hospitals around our area are requiring BSN's now for entry.  While I certainly believe you that an AA can get you in the door, I would be wary of the trend towards BSN being required.  I can envision a scenario where your public sector employee essentially forces you into a AA to BSN program.

Does my wife have regrets?  No, I wouldn't call them regrets.  She lost a childhood friend in 9th grade and dedicated her life to kids immediately after.  Eventually she wants to do pediatric oncology, but she definitely enjoys what she does.  She certainly has complaints, but they are typical workplace-specific type complaints, not the "I hate my career" complaints.  Twelve hour night shifts certainly aren't her idea of "fun", but she does really enjoy her work.  As an attestation to her actual enjoyment of the position, she is working an extra 12+ hours as week as faculty at her alma mater as I mentioned earlier. 

My advice to you is honestly just push through it.  Nursing school is wayyyy harder than most people realize, but the letters behind your name are absolutely worth it.  She was lucky to get a very good job right after graduation, but now with her experience, she can work at any hospital in the country.  The need for nurses will only rise as the baby boomers retire, so from a purely financial perspective it is a good industry to be getting into.

2ndTimer

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Re: No idea what I want in life
« Reply #12 on: November 06, 2014, 10:47:13 AM »
School can be tough.  I can remember getting in the elevator to go ask questions of my Math instructor and wishing it would crash.  You have only got about seven months to go so I would concentrate on surviving and getting a job.  I am guessing, since you said "if I survive" that you are struggling with the academic stuff.  The job will have different challenges than school than school and you may find that they are challenges you enjoy more.  Some people like to study and other people like to actually do things.  Having a job that pays decently really increases your options.

La Bibliotecaria Feroz

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Re: No idea what I want in life
« Reply #13 on: November 06, 2014, 07:53:50 PM »
Get a job and start working before you commit to anything. You need to know more about the field and get your hands dirty. While hospitals are tightening their belts, some will still provide some tuition assistance for working on your BSN.

NP and nurse anesthetist will now require a doctoral degree. I have a sister who went to nursing school thinking she wanted to be a home birth midwife. Then she started working in the NICU and loves it soooo much. But her pay's been cut (not her base rate, but things like the weekend differential and her transport nurse differential) and she is planning on starting a doctoral program to insulate herself from that a bit more--wants to be a neonatal nurse practitioner. Something she would never have thought she wanted to do when she first enrolled!

Primm

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Re: No idea what I want in life
« Reply #14 on: November 06, 2014, 08:10:06 PM »
I don't know how long your parents have been nursing, but nowadays it is impossible to get a management or NP role without a higher degree (masters minimum, in most cases). In a vacant position if your resume doesn't include MSc or MN it won't even get past HR. Your parents make the same money as everyone else because that's what the role requires.

matchewed

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Re: No idea what I want in life
« Reply #15 on: November 07, 2014, 05:50:15 AM »
I'd start with this: Bloom where you're planted, baby. Right now you're in school and you need to figure out how to enjoy it. Next you need to figure out a facet of nursing that appeals to you. There will be scores of options available to you once you've completed your degree. Since you're young and single, I'd consider some kind of travel/nursing option that includes housing costs.

The beauty of becoming an adult is you get to figure all of this out on your own. It's incredibly powerful, but all I hear is you mewing like a kitten. This is understandable to a very limited extent, but is not going to get you to your goals. It's kind of like an overweight person wanting to wake up in the morning twenty pounds lighter. Won't happen overnight or by any amount of wishing or whining. It will happen with baby steps, taken over and over and over. You need to start taking baby steps toward your future, sister. You are facing a wealth of opportunities to create the life you want. Expecting to get there without putting in some deep thought and effort is not going to cut it.

If you want to be FI, starting in a well-paying career early, keeping expenses low and managing your wants (hint, hint) plus saving and investing are the way to get there. You are being given a golden chance to do all of this. Don't squander it because your life isn't "fun" right now.

+1

Your circumstances will change throughout your life. You need to learn more about building some resiliency and learning how your happiness is not dependent on your environment but on you. After that you can pursue whatever you want. I personally like the path of pursuing that which you are good at. Keep going to school it won't take too long and it will be a blip along your lifetime. You'll most likely look back at it more fondly than you do now. As for FI it doesn't matter what you do. Save much more than you spend and you hit FI rather quickly.

Murse

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Re: No idea what I want in life
« Reply #16 on: November 07, 2014, 06:21:19 AM »
I don't know how long your parents have been nursing, but nowadays it is impossible to get a management or NP role without a higher degree (masters minimum, in most cases). In a vacant position if your resume doesn't include MSc or MN it won't even get past HR. Your parents make the same money as everyone else because that's what the role requires.
I want to thank everyone for their wisdom and welcome more input.

Because everyone seems curious, I suppose I can say that they work for the department of corrections in my home state. When I spoke about the "public" sector I meant that they work for the state (maybe my definition is a tad bit off.) Anyways, yes you all are right about the requirements if you are talking specifically about hospitals (although there are still a couple exceptions in my area but that may change.)