Author Topic: Net worth at birth of first child?  (Read 21051 times)

InternationalStache

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Net worth at birth of first child?
« on: February 06, 2015, 04:02:51 PM »
What was your net worth when your first child was born? If you haven't had a child yet, what net worth are you aiming for upon such birth? More important, when do you think is the optimal time to have a kid in the path to FIRE?

Seems like MMM had about $650k banked at that time....

ysette9

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #1 on: February 06, 2015, 04:27:15 PM »
Our net worth was pretty much at the $1M mark when our baby was born. We certainly didn't plan it that way and had planned on starting a family earlier, but Mother Nature often has tricks up her sleeve.

I hadn't thought about an optimal time to have a kid with respect to FIRE. We had our baby at 32/33 and that has been good for us on many levels. We are both established in our careers, have plenty of savings, and are very solid in our relationship. Career-wise I have felt like I put in a lot of hard work earlier to establish a reputation for myself which has allowed me to coast at a lower gear while pregnant and first back at work. Personally I can't imagine trying to balance getting ahead at work while not getting any sleep at night!

Finally, I had a complicated pregnancy (and prior losses) and gave birth to a low birth-weight preemie. All of that in itself was very stressful. It was a great sense of comfort to me to not worry about being able to afford the healthcare aspects of all of that, or just going ahead and ordering whatever we needed on Google Express when home-bound with a preemie who couldn't be exposed to the outside world.

MBot

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #2 on: February 06, 2015, 05:12:56 PM »
This is tough. Getting to the age where waiting can mean complications, but net worth is nowhere near where we'd like.  Following. 

moustache1979

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #3 on: February 06, 2015, 05:27:39 PM »
2008 / NW was probably somewhat negative after the housing crash.

NW has increased nicely since

JLee

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #4 on: February 06, 2015, 05:29:34 PM »
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frugaldrummer

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #5 on: February 06, 2015, 05:36:49 PM »
We were both in residency, estimated net worth minus $35k.
My advice would be, don't delay childbearing too long for solely financial reasons.  A stache is nice but fertility declines with age.

Emilyngh

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #6 on: February 06, 2015, 05:38:00 PM »
Eh, not completely sure, but somewhere between $100-$150k.   Not close to FI, but a good enough start that without a ton of effort we'll be there before the kid gets to college age.

IMO, the more important question is: what are your established spending habits before having a child?

  I think it's more important to focus on having good habits in place (eg., cutting out the fat of expensive phones, eating out often, cable, inexpensive vacations, limiting shopping etc)and establishing a lifestyle where a child can be added without increasing expenses too much (eg., avoiding getting too much house, carefully thinking about daycare and activity costs, making sure both parents have jobs with flexibility/time to be with kid, etc).

Bracken_Joy

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #7 on: February 06, 2015, 05:40:08 PM »
We haven't had kids yet, but will in a couple years (hopefully!!!). Hopefully will have the debt other than mortgage gone by then, but either way, won't change our timeline. I've seen too many relatives not be able to have children when they waited too long, and it is just too big a priority for us to risk.

Following this because I'm VERY curious about other answers.

trailrated

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #8 on: February 06, 2015, 05:41:41 PM »
about -$10,000 when I found out.... $1,000 by the time he was born.... ~$70,000 now less than a year and a half later. Making progress :)

Kaydedid

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #9 on: February 06, 2015, 08:35:59 PM »
Expecting our first in about a month, net worth is ~100k, increasing 10-20k/yr.  Definitely agree that it's better to get your financial habits in order before kiddos. 

We are expecting our overall expenses to go up.  Even while pregnant, there have been some unexpected costs (prepared food due to morning sickness, gym membership for water classes when joints couldn't handle normal exercise).  Make sure you have the flexibility to handle unexpected expenses. 

Also, please be aware that really expensive things might come up.  Our son-to-be has a severe birth defect/disability, which requires one stay-at-home parent and out-of-pocket medical costs of at 6k/yr (and rising, not counting the 3k/yr for insurance).

We consider having kids to be a dream/life goal, like FI.  Sometimes you have to make sacrifices on one dream to move ahead another.  We are really glad to be having this little guy, but if we weren't mustachians who saved a huge percentage of our income, things would be a heck of a lot harder.

bdoubleu

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #10 on: February 06, 2015, 09:00:32 PM »
NW when we first found out we were expecting ~2 years ago = ~$120,000.  Didn't work out (x3, yikes!), went through lots of testing ($$) to find out "they" can't find anything wrong with either of us.  Official diagnosis = super unlucky (/sarcasm).

NW round 4, due in July (completely natural, zero issues thus far) = ~$270,000 when we found out, anticipating ~$340,000 by the due date.  Going against every screaming voice in my head right now and just dumping all spare cash into regular savings "just in case" anything comes up.  I know in the long run it won't make much of a difference (vs having it invested).

I look at the first three "tries" as a blessing in disguise - I/we didn't plan having kids around how much money we had, we more wanted to enjoy a child-free lifestyle for a few years.  But it turns out, I am much more relaxed this time around, and I know at least part of that has to do with my increased comfort level with our current financial situation.

johnny847

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #11 on: February 06, 2015, 09:10:32 PM »
Finally, I had a complicated pregnancy (and prior losses) and gave birth to a low birth-weight preemie. All of that in itself was very stressful. It was a great sense of comfort to me to not worry about being able to afford the healthcare aspects of all of that, or just going ahead and ordering whatever we needed on Google Express when home-bound with a preemie who couldn't be exposed to the outside world.
Now I have no idea what your medical history is like and that is none of my business. But statistically speaking, women who give birth when they're younger have a better chance of having a complication free pregnancy. So statistically speaking, your chances of needing money to deal with complications are lower when a woman gives birth when she is younger.

Reyes01

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #12 on: February 06, 2015, 09:12:58 PM »
Zero

OR

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #13 on: February 06, 2015, 09:59:28 PM »
About $175K or so.  We had several years of stashing go to paying off student loans, so our overall progress was more.  A good start, but it was just time.  The stash does tend to slow down after kids.  More expenses (not that much), less work (less $).  A worthy trade off though, IMHO.

catccc

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #14 on: February 06, 2015, 10:00:08 PM »
Our first was born in October 2008, and our NW at the time was about $200k.

We'd been married for 9 months at the time, and if I remember correctly, DH brought about $10k into the marriage and $150k had come from my stash.  The rest (to get to the $200k) was saved between getting married and having the baby.  When she was born, I quit my 80k/yr accounting job to be at home, and DH kept his $25k/yr farming job.  We didn't spend a single cent of savings while I stayed home for 15 months! Then we swapped and he took the SAHP role.  Well, kinda.  I went back to accounting, I didn't start farming. 

Our first is now 6, and we have a 3 year old.  Our net worth is now about $570k.  Maybe slower accumulation than higher earners, dinks, or parents that started later (I'm now 35). But I'm still very proud of what we have been able to do!

TN_Steve

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #15 on: February 06, 2015, 10:05:56 PM »
We were both in residency, estimated net worth minus $35k.
My advice would be, don't delay childbearing too long for solely financial reasons.  A stache is nice but fertility declines with age.

I'm impressed at only (35,000) with both of you in residency!

We were negative 60K or so, but that was back in 1980s.  DW had our first in third year residency, and our second in the fourth year.  She is OBG and strongly agreed with the highlighted observation. 

Plus, although many thought we were nuts at planning pregnancies at that stage, all three of ours were out of undergrad when we were in our early fifties, which still feels pretty young.

catccc

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #16 on: February 06, 2015, 10:06:12 PM »
It took us 6 non-kid years and two incomes to get to $200k.
In the following 6 years on one income with kid(s), we gained $370k.

So it didn't actually slow us down, in our case!

frugaldrummer

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #17 on: February 06, 2015, 11:04:31 PM »
@TN Steve...we went to med school in the 80s, at a state school. Neither of us had undergraduate loans, we both had worked through undergrad. My ex's father paid most of his med school expenses since he hadn't had to pay anything on his undergrad. I had loans for med school but we kept our expenses very low, (room mates, batch cooking, etc.) .

pancakes

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #18 on: February 06, 2015, 11:12:46 PM »
Following along because we are thinking about kids but keep delaying it because of concerns about financial independence.

We have a net worth of just over 150k at the moment (not including HECS/HELP loans because I haven't looked at those recently and don't know what the balances are) and I'd like that to be higher before we have kids. I'm the kind of person who will always think it is best to save another $10k to be on the safe side, and another $10 after that, etc. 
« Last Edit: February 07, 2015, 02:02:59 AM by pancakes »

pdxvandal

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #19 on: February 06, 2015, 11:25:54 PM »
We were on the fence for a while to have any kids. But we did (one). Our net worth at the time was about 400k (me, 35, wife 37 at the time).

HappierAtHome

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #20 on: February 06, 2015, 11:32:49 PM »
Net worth should be ~$1M by the time we want to have a kid. We're not waiting for that net worth, though! That's just the trajectory.

For context around the net worth, I'll be 29/30 and the BF will be 36/37. Assuming that all goes to plan :-)

Bookworm

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #21 on: February 07, 2015, 12:53:51 AM »
It was definitely negative when the first one was born. I was 22. It was probably about $50,000 (all home equity) when the fourth and last one was born, when I was 27.

merula

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #22 on: February 07, 2015, 02:57:23 AM »
Times like this, I love Mint. NW on the day my son was born: $35,932.

I think that was probably a little low. We thought we were awesome saving 15% of income and were still digging out of real estate/student loan mistakes. It's worked out, but when I think of FIRE in terms of my kids' ages, I get a little sad. I feel like I should have been better before they were born so that I could really be there for them.

But you can't change the past, and better late than never.
« Last Edit: August 19, 2016, 12:56:03 PM by merula »

georgialiving

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #23 on: February 07, 2015, 05:11:57 AM »
We were -22k when I found out I was pregnant (surprise!) and positive 5k when she was born. I also advise not to wait too long because 1) kids don't know how much you have anyway. 2) things don't always work as planned getting pregnant. Even if you are young you can have difficulties.


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darkadams00

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #24 on: February 07, 2015, 07:05:54 AM »
Pfffft. My NW was low enough in my 20s, my banker said I shouldn't get married. Well, we have a 23rd anniversary on the way, so that advice was pretty worthless. Two years afterwards, I had a son--NW around $20k. Two years later, a second son. Now both are successfully working their way through college. I thoroughly enjoyed their childhoods, and I'll be young enough to enjoy my grandkids throughout their childhoods as well.

My experience--one grandfather was in his 80s during my teens. The other was in his early 60s. Who do you think I had a relationship with? The younger grandfather ended up being the best man at my wedding.

Be careful about "family planning" solely around finances and your career. Life changes, opportunities pass, fertile 20s might become infertile 30s, and then there's those grandkids. Waiting for the "right" time works out for some but not all.

Bracken_Joy

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #25 on: February 07, 2015, 08:11:49 AM »

Be careful about "family planning" solely around finances and your career. Life changes, opportunities pass, fertile 20s might become infertile 30s, and then there's those grandkids. Waiting for the "right" time works out for some but not all.

Enough of my friends are dealing with "infertile 20s" that I'm already worried! We're talking 25-27 year olds here. Infertility is shockingly common.

ysette9

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #26 on: February 07, 2015, 09:23:43 AM »
I think this type of crowd loves to plan and track (I sure do), but when it comes to starting a family, things really are out of your hands to a certain extent. We started as soon as I turned 30 (young-ish here in Silicon Valley) and got pregnant right away. We cruised through the first trimester and thought that we were on track. Turns out that though the statistics say your chance of loss greatly diminishes if you make it through the first three months okay, that didn't mean we were in the clear. '

To respond to a previous poster, yes, the odds of having complications do increase with age. In our particular case I believe our problem is pretty much independent of age. Talking with my family later, I am pretty sure my aunt suffered the same problem which led to them having 5 consecutive losses and never having a baby, and they started when she was in her early 20s.

To add perspective though, most people are able to successfully have babies. I believe the problem cases really stand out in our minds and might give the impression of being more prevalent than they really are.

Bracken_Joy

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #27 on: February 07, 2015, 09:32:02 AM »
I think this type of crowd loves to plan and track (I sure do), but when it comes to starting a family, things really are out of your hands to a certain extent. We started as soon as I turned 30 (young-ish here in Silicon Valley) and got pregnant right away. We cruised through the first trimester and thought that we were on track. Turns out that though the statistics say your chance of loss greatly diminishes if you make it through the first three months okay, that didn't mean we were in the clear. '

To respond to a previous poster, yes, the odds of having complications do increase with age. In our particular case I believe our problem is pretty much independent of age. Talking with my family later, I am pretty sure my aunt suffered the same problem which led to them having 5 consecutive losses and never having a baby, and they started when she was in her early 20s.

To add perspective though, most people are able to successfully have babies. I believe the problem cases really stand out in our minds and might give the impression of being more prevalent than they really are.

"According to their estimates, up to 16% of heterosexual couples where the woman is age 18 to 44 are experiencing infertility – a near doubling since the previous time infertility was measured in the nation in 1992." from http://globalnews.ca/news/212528/new-study-finds-infertility-rates-on-the-rise-for-canadian-couples/

Also, http://www.reuters.com/article/2013/01/11/us-couples-infertility-idUSBRE90A13Y20130111

Infertility rates are increasing globally. I also tried to find one article again and couldn't, but I did read a very well presented piece that posited that a lot of the decrease in teen pregnancy rates is actually due to primary infertility, as opposed to the array of health initiatives currently in place.

ToeInTheWater

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #28 on: February 07, 2015, 09:33:26 AM »
had our 1st a little over 2 yrs out of college (1983).  no student loans, pretty much everything we owned was financed (car, condo), so NW was probably pretty close to zero.  maybe slightly positive.

Gray Matter

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #29 on: February 07, 2015, 10:34:36 AM »
Probably around 150K.  About 100K in home equity, the rest in retirement accounts.

ldk

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #30 on: February 07, 2015, 11:03:37 AM »
Teenage mom (17) when son was born; 23 when daughter was born….married and bought a home at 21. Our net worth would have been maybe $12,000 + a black and white tv and a water bed:)

Currently 44/empty nesters/both kids in university/net worth~$1.4m.

madamwitty

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #31 on: February 07, 2015, 11:20:58 AM »
I was 28 years old when DD1 was born. DH and I had about $160k in our house, $30k in retirement accts, and $30k in cash (some earmarked for improvements to our new, neglected house). So total, $220k. Until DD was born, we were putting away $1k per week post tax, though not maxing our 403(b)s. It was tempting to keep going with the moneymaking machine, but kids were a big life goal and honestly, I was happy to have the excuse to work part time. Definitely worth delaying FI a bit to have a more relaxed work schedule. That's not to say that it's relaxed around here with three kids!

FIreDrill

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #32 on: February 07, 2015, 02:33:04 PM »
My Wife and I wanted to be married for 5 years or so before having kids.  We aren't delaying kids in order to get closer to FI but at the rate we are going we will have about 360k - 500k put away assuming our fist kid shows up in 4 years.  We are currently 21 and 24 with a NW of 120k.

daymare

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #33 on: February 07, 2015, 04:42:41 PM »
I read an article recently that's quite relevant to the fertility discussion: http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2013/07/how-long-can-you-wait-to-have-a-baby/309374

Husband and I are 25 now, with ~117K in investments.  No plans to have children until after 30, so I expect/hope to have at least 500K by then.  But honestly, timing children doesn't have anything directly to do with net worth.  I am pretty neutral on having kids, though my husband wants them, so our decision is we'll definitely have one.  I don't anticipate wanting more, but the door is obviously open.  A lot of my personality traits that have set me in pursuit of FI are why I'm not interested in having kids. 

I'm an analytical, introverted, planning/goal oriented, intellectual.  I relish the freedom to read books in peace, time for intellectual pursuits (currently doing PhD), strong bonds with friends, the knowns of my current great life.  Children (their temperament/personality/interests) are unpredictable, time-consuming, and life-disrupting (most would argue, in a great way).  So at the moment, I don't want any of that.  I do think that if my husband really wanted to have kids young, I might push back about wanting a more firm situation financially/job-wise (and I guess wouldn't have married him).  I also intend for us to be FI by around 40, so I think having a kid(s) at 30-35 would be good timing in that once they're old enough to be more independent, we could have a lot of fun and flexibility.  But who knows - maybe we can't have kids, and I'm ok with that, at least hypothetically (see: neutral).

I find this discussion interesting!  Especially that some people state having kids hasn't held them back at all financially, whereas others acknowledge kids impacted their finances.

hunniebun

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #34 on: February 07, 2015, 06:26:08 PM »
Maybe 100K which was 7 years ago and having just discovered MMM recently I sure wish I had planned things better. If you are close...FIREing before kids would be ideal.  It is so easy to get stuck in the double income trap when you have a few kids. I so wish that I could turn back the clock, make different/better choices and have at least managed to have person stay at home. Sadly, we inflated our lifestyle with kids as the excuse (bigger house better neighbourbood, mini van etc.) and now we are feeling stuck.  It is much easier to build the life you want Before having children than it is to deconstruct an inflated life that requires two incomes to keep afloat.  (eg. the easiest way to save money is to move...but moving when you have kids daycare arrangements, friends, sports teams etc. to relocated is easier said than done. For example...the waiting list for most daycare centers in my city is 1-2 YEARS so moving is not a simple solution.   
That being said, money shouldn't be the only factor dictating when to have kids...the truth is that there is a window for fertility and there is no arguing with that.  I had my first at 31 and the second at 35 and I can tell you having a baby at 35 is exhausting. It was physically more difficult to conceive, pregnancy was higher risk and hard on my body,  not to mention that even as a fit 37 year old...keeping up with kids is tiring!   Good luck with it all!!! 

SaintM

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #35 on: February 07, 2015, 06:30:41 PM »
Broke and facing medical bills that were out of this world (almost $1M)...what a difference 14 years makes.

SMCx3

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #36 on: February 07, 2015, 06:54:57 PM »
Learning to be good loving parents is much more important than net worth when you are starting a family. 

If net worth is priority #1 then maybe you should hold off starting a family. Although when your first son or daughter arrives, I am pretty confident dollar signs will not be your first priority. Taking care of your baby / babies can bring you much more joy than having $5 Million in the bank at 25 years of age. If you have a healthy lifestyle, make family a priority, work smart, the net worth will come with or without kids. 


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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #37 on: February 07, 2015, 07:02:10 PM »
We were both in residency, estimated net worth minus $35k.
My advice would be, don't delay childbearing too long for solely financial reasons.  A stache is nice but fertility declines with age.

Another medical couple here. We were at -$400k when our 1st was born.

11ducks

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #38 on: February 07, 2015, 07:12:34 PM »
Teenage mom (17) when son was born; 23 when daughter was born….married and bought a home at 21. Our net worth would have been maybe $12,000 + a black and white tv and a water bed:)

Currently 44/empty nesters/both kids in university/net worth~$1.4m.

Inspiring. I'm Similar - I was 20 when my son was born (single), am now 31 and looking forward to being an empty nester by around 40 too! It's hard at the time, young and broke with babies, but looking at peers who are my age and now looking at having kids, I feel so lucky to have started early.  My net worth at the time was in the negative (school loans), but am hoping to get to where you are by 40-45!

Embok

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #39 on: February 07, 2015, 08:23:17 PM »
We were both in residency, estimated net worth minus $35k.
My advice would be, don't delay childbearing too long for solely financial reasons.  A stache is nice but fertility declines with age.

I second this.  Had a significant negative net worth (probably -$50K) when I had DD at 35.  Was a lawyer; DD had significant birth trauma but got better.  After 5 months at home (out of a 6 month leave) I went back to work, which for me was way easier than staying at home with a baby.  We managed, and 19 years later, DD is in her first choice college.  If I were doing it again, I'd have had her earlier, when the pregnancy would have been less risky. 

Kids don't have to add that much expense if you don't buy them loads of crap.  While DD was young, I had expensive child care (worth it for us), bought mostly used clothes from a kids consignment store (typically 95% less than retail),  used the library for books and videos, went for lots of walks for fun, bought few toys (lots of folks gave her toys) and made lots of art at home with her.  Also taught her to cook and entertain at home, and she's now one of the few kids in her college who can whip up a good dinner.  We are killer Scrabble players, and getting better at Settlers. 

We did public school until high school, then private school (I know many others don't think that's worth it, but it was good for her, though quite expensive).  In our high COL area, it was better economically to live in a house in a not brilliant school district and pay private school tuition for one kid.  She learned to dress vintage, share our cars, and get jobs for her spending money.  We are paying for college - grad school will be at her own expense -- again, our family values education highly, although many folks may have different opinions about that decision, and my folks helped me, so I'm just passing that on.  After that, my goal is for DH and me to have enough socked away so that we are never a burden to her -- we had to support our parents in their old age, and while I'm glad we did it, it was a heavy burden for about 15 years.

James

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #40 on: February 07, 2015, 08:29:21 PM »
We had negative net worth and were young and stupid about finances. Live and learn.

TN_Steve

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #41 on: February 07, 2015, 08:49:22 PM »
.... I am pretty neutral on having kids, though my husband wants them, so our decision is we'll definitely have one.  I don't anticipate wanting more, but the door is obviously open.  A lot of my personality traits that have set me in pursuit of FI are why I'm not interested in having kids. 

I'm an analytical, introverted, planning/goal oriented, intellectual.  I relish the freedom to read books in peace, time for intellectual pursuits (currently doing PhD), strong bonds with friends, the knowns of my current great life.  Children (their temperament/personality/interests) are unpredictable, time-consuming, and life-disrupting (most would argue, in a great way).  So at the moment, I don't want any of that. ....

Boy, this sounds like both DW and me!  She was top 10 in her med school class, I was first in law class, and we love nothing more than sitting down next to each other with a book.  But, notwithstanding that, we did enjoy our kids from birth to now.  And yeah, no matter what, it will kick retirement back--especially if the dynamics are such that one spouse (me) takes 15 years off from full-time work to raise them and facilitate the other spouse's career.  For us, it was well worth it. Others may differ.  YMMV--but don't be shocked if you are surprised after having one.  :-)

pancakes

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #42 on: February 07, 2015, 09:37:48 PM »

Kids don't have to add that much expense if you don't buy them loads of crap.  While DD was young, I had expensive child care (worth it for us), bought mostly used clothes from a kids consignment store (typically 95% less than retail),  used the library for books and videos, went for lots of walks for fun, bought few toys (lots of folks gave her toys) and made lots of art at home with her.  Also taught her to cook and entertain at home, and she's now one of the few kids in her college who can whip up a good dinner.  We are killer Scrabble players, and getting better at Settlers. 
I wonder if this is part of my mental block when it comes to kids. My parents would complain to no end about how expensive we were to look after and in my mind I can't help but think that kids = expensive.

My parents made some expensive choices though, like having a private nanny/housekeeper look after us in our home rather than using more conventional and affordable childcare. I also get the impression that hiring private childcare in Australia is far more expensive than in most other countries. When I think about it, our nanny (that sounds very British doesn't it?) lived in a huge house quite close to the city and kept horses. In retrospect it all seems quite strange.

imustachemystash

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #43 on: February 07, 2015, 09:58:37 PM »
We had a negative net worth when out first was born when I was 28 husband was 30.  The second was born at when I was 30.  We will be FI when I am around 43.  I like going to work part time in order to get a break from my two rowdy boys.    I'm glad we didn't wait any longer to have kids because man they drain the energy right out of me!

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #44 on: February 07, 2015, 10:37:09 PM »
Pancakes:

We also did not travel much with our daughter.  We live within an hour of the ocean, so vacations were mostly staycations.  (Traveling with small kids is hell IMHO, esp. in airplanes, so we just stayed home or took car trips til she was about 10).   

The local zoo was Big Fun.  Free days at local museums once she was old enough.  Picnics.  Short hikes. 

  I usually did very modest birthday parties at home or a local park, where the kids could tear around.  (All they ever wanted was pizza and cake - and we made the cake!). We had neighbor kids in to decorate gingerbread houses once - a huge mess, but DD still talks about that!  Later dance parties at our house with DH as the DJ.  The local Boys and Girls club and YMCA had great cheap activities.

Most of the things kids NEED beyond the basics are time with their parents, some of which should be silly play IMHO!   And some practical skills, such as cleaning, cooking, reading, etc.  Also, your own kid(s) are much more interesting than other people's, and they tend to be a lot like you, so tend to grow up with similar tastes. 

Before I had DD, I didn't know if I'd be a good mom.  As it happens, I love being a mom, but also love working outside the home.  I wish I'd had more kids, but I have one great one, and really enjoy her company the vast majority of the time.  It's a serious decision to have children, but I'm glad I did, and so is DH, even though it cost some money.  Everyone has to make up his or her own mind about it, however.

pancakes

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #45 on: February 07, 2015, 10:47:17 PM »
I definitely want children, it is just a matter of timing. Both DH and I are the kind to put things off and wait for betting timing but we are also aware that with children you can't keep doing that forever.

johnny847

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #46 on: February 07, 2015, 11:46:06 PM »
I definitely want children, it is just a matter of timing. Both DH and I are the kind to put things off and wait for betting timing but we are also aware that with children you can't keep doing that forever.
I think this opinion has been voiced before on this thread, but I've heard it said that there will always be an excuse not ro have children at the moment. There's virtually never a good time (unless you're like MMM and can retire at 30, I suppose). But there's a guaranteed bad time (as you imply, when infertility starts to become an issue).

Now obviously I don't know your situation and perhaps there are extenuating circumstances in your case.

Nudelkopf

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #47 on: February 08, 2015, 12:04:34 AM »
I'm single. No babies yet for me :(


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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #48 on: February 08, 2015, 01:25:15 AM »
Didn't really start tracking our NW until recently. Just found out with hubby's 401k that our current NW is around $640k. I had my first kid 8 months ago when I was 34. There are some advantages to waiting a bit. You have time to travel and pursue other goals like graduate school which are harder to do with a baby. You are more stable in your job and finances. i would still recommend not waiting too long though as fertility declines and you have higher chances of Down's syndrome and other genetic defects when over 35.

kander

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Re: Net worth at birth of first child?
« Reply #49 on: February 08, 2015, 03:42:28 AM »
Our son was born in November 2013. Net worth we did not track yet at that moment. We began in May 2014. Net value was € 11,493.95 at that time.