Author Topic: Midwife vs Hospital  (Read 16308 times)

norabird

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Re: Midwife vs Hospital
« Reply #50 on: September 25, 2016, 01:45:29 PM »
Finding a doula (if one wants) AND finding a great doctor are both important! :)


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Gin1984

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Re: Midwife vs Hospital
« Reply #51 on: September 26, 2016, 08:09:45 AM »
The midwives/doulas are valued for their emotional support and expertise plus can advocate for you. It's still important to have access to a doctor in case it's needed, but basically all my friends have had doulas and found them to be incredibly helpful for the process (they get involved early). I don't think this is an either/or--it should be a both/and.
I don't really get why you would need somebody to "advocate" for you. Doctors are already bound by their professional oaths to have your best interest at heart. It's totally unclear to me why you'd want another less-educated and less-informed layer between you and the doctor.

My son was born in hospital with OB attending. It was a totally normal (I.e. With epidural, vaginal) birth.
I would have said the same thing, until I gave birth.  One of my main things was that I did not want an epidural.  I have a serious needle phobia, and them sticking a needle in my back was not going to happen.  And yet at one point, the MD who had agreed with me during my nine months of pregnancy says let's get the epi prepped.  I flipped (especially since I was in middle of labor) and was screaming no epi, no epi.  Yet, they did not listen to me, until my husband spoke up and said she is serious, no epidural.  It has been shown that women are not as listen to as men, and especially not listened to during birth. 
It also has been shown that having a support person (husband, doula, what have you) does decrease adverse outcomes for both mother and baby.  That is why, unlike most other medical procedures, you can have a support person there.  If you don't think your SO will get your needs across, you may need to pay someone to do so.  That said, this happens in other medical fields and having an advocate is starting to become more popular. 

Gin1984

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Re: Midwife vs Hospital
« Reply #52 on: September 26, 2016, 08:12:31 AM »
But I mean surely the same could be said of a midwife or doula? You shop around to find a doula who will hear you. So instead of doing this to find a doula, do it to find a doctor? I guess if you're very constrained by insurance circumstances I can see a case for this, but I hear of people who have plenty of options of which doctor to use who still go with a doula. This is the situation I'm curious about.

I also worry that feeling "heard" might sometimes be code for having one's wishes acceded to. If one's wishes are unsafe, then that would be a bad idea.

But anyway, it's none of my business really. People should do what works best for them. I just am not fully clear on the circumstances where using a doula is more optimal than finding a doctor who communicates well.
If one is a mentally competent adult, their wishes should be acceded.  That is the point of informed consent, you cannot have a medical procedure done, on you, without your consent.  Unfortunately MDs are used to dealing with people with a sixth grade knowledge of medicine/science and are not accustomed to not getting automatic consent. 

FLBiker

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Re: Midwife vs Hospital
« Reply #53 on: September 26, 2016, 10:51:35 AM »
There are midwives in hospitals.

2 of my 3 babies were born in major hospitals with Certified Nurse Midwives doing every aspect of prenatal care, labor, delivery, and postpartum

This is what we did, too.  And I'm glad we did.  Even though everything went fine, DD's heartrate got quite low during active labor, and we had a NICU team standing by in our room.

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Re: Midwife vs Hospital
« Reply #54 on: September 26, 2016, 12:37:20 PM »
Our hospital has a few midwifes on staff full time for all pre and post pregnancy care. This is what we did. It also didn't effect our insurance in anyway since I was still going through our hospital. So, I got the best of both worlds. I had a great pregnancy and had a wonderful midwife during my monthly and weekly checkups. I absolutely loved having a midwife. Unfortunately, during my 36th week I was diagnosed with something called HELLP Syndrome and I had to have an emergency C section otherwise my liver would have ruptured and I could have died if I didn't deliver as soon as possible. As much as I wanted to have a water birth with my midwife at the hospital - I had to have a c section with the OB on staff. So, I am so thankful for the midwife experience, but I am so grateful for the OB staff as well and that I could do this all at the same hospital. So, if you have an option to have a midwife at your local hospital or birthing center - I would recommend that! After what happened to me, I am not personally comfortable with an at home birth but I have absolutely nothing against it.

I'm a red panda

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Re: Midwife vs Hospital
« Reply #55 on: September 26, 2016, 01:40:58 PM »
If one is a mentally competent adult, their wishes should be acceded.  That is the point of informed consent, you cannot have a medical procedure done, on you, without your consent.  Unfortunately MDs are used to dealing with people with a sixth grade knowledge of medicine/science and are not accustomed to not getting automatic consent.

And yet, it seems to happen all the time to pregnant women.

I've known women insisting they don't want their membranes stripped, and the doctor shoves their hands right on up to do it while the woman is saying "you do not have my permission to do this procedure".

Way too many doctors don't listen to women.  (It's really not just pregnancy either. I went to the ER with chest pains and it took them over 30 minutes to do an EKG (10 minutes to get a room, then 20 more to get the EKG in). They then tried to trick my husband into telling them I had anxiety.  My husband went to the ER with chest pain, and he had an EKG on him in the triage room, less than 2 minutes after we walked in the door. In BOTH of our cases, it seemed to be panic attacks- but they treated him like he might be having a heart attack and me like I was probably crazy. They never tried to get me to tell them he was a high stressed person and this was probably in his head.)
« Last Edit: September 26, 2016, 02:07:55 PM by iowajes »

aprilchem

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Re: Midwife vs Hospital
« Reply #56 on: September 26, 2016, 01:57:58 PM »
Here it comes---- I was a very fit, happy, healthy pregnant lady until the day I went into labor. My blood pressure shot up, my daughter's heart would stop during my contractions, and I ended up in an emergency C section despite having 0 risk.

I am very very glad I elected to have a hospital birth.

This is entirely anecdotal, but you'll never know when you need an operating table. At the end of the day, all that matters is a healthy baby and healthy mama. I am very supportive of people wanting a doula in a hospital setting though.

I was in the same situation.  Healthy pregnant lady and labor was progressing fine until my son's heart rate started plummeting with each contraction.  Was rushed into an emergency c-section where it was discovered that I have a bone deformity in my pelvis; basically there was a bone pushing directly into my son's fontanelle with each contraction.  My OB told me (after the fact) that had we not made the choice we made when we made it he likely wouldn't have made it.   In my two subsequent pregnancies I was induced 2 weeks before my due date, with orders to beat it to the hospital if I had even one contraction.

That being said, I think doulas are great and midwives are wonderful.  Having been through what I've been through, though, I wouldn't encourage anyone to have a home birth.

purple monkey

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Re: Midwife vs Hospital
« Reply #57 on: September 27, 2016, 06:53:52 AM »

[/quote]
  Unfortunately MDs are used to dealing with people with a sixth grade knowledge of medicine/science and are not accustomed to not getting automatic consent.
[/quote]

Yes, and they also are used to being in control at all costs.

A woman's voice is rarely heard by a male physician.

Hopefully you all will remain healthy and not have to interact much with medical folks until end of life.

Birth plans are a joke to obgyns.

Doulas are angels.

purple monkey

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Re: Midwife vs Hospital
« Reply #58 on: September 27, 2016, 08:03:53 AM »
Yes, emergencies can happen to healthy women.

Sometimes the fit mother has this happen because of pitocin.

Had a friend that specifically said NO pitocin.

She was a given an IV and within 2 minutes the baby was in distress.

She started telling everyone her birth story.

Her husband corrected her and said everything had been fine with the monitor until the IV.

She later got her medical records and the IV had pitocin in it.

It happens all the time that women are told their body was the problem, when it was the intervention.

canadian bacon

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Re: Midwife vs Hospital
« Reply #59 on: September 28, 2016, 02:42:42 PM »
I hate how in america women place pressure on other women in how a birth is done.  There is the feeling that you are a better mother if you can do it "naturally" and drug free makes you the best of all.   

Women should never feel that a difficult birth is their fault or that an easy one was a sign of their preparedness. 

If it was all mind over matter then I would recommend dula at home.  It is not, giving birth is one of the most dangerous things that a women goes through.  Prepare as if it will be difficult and pray that it will be easy...

Maybe I just don't understand

englishteacheralex

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Re: Midwife vs Hospital
« Reply #60 on: September 28, 2016, 02:58:01 PM »
I hate how in america women place pressure on other women in how a birth is done.  There is the feeling that you are a better mother if you can do it "naturally" and drug free makes you the best of all.   

Women should never feel that a difficult birth is their fault or that an easy one was a sign of their preparedness. 

If it was all mind over matter then I would recommend dula at home.  It is not, giving birth is one of the most dangerous things that a women goes through.  Prepare as if it will be difficult and pray that it will be easy...

Maybe I just don't understand

I only know moms in a America, but I also think it's weird that birth kind of seems like a competitive sport over here. When people ask and I tell them I had a drug free birth, I get this weird congratulatory response that makes no sense to me. Um, I'm afraid of needles? And now that I've been through "natural" labor, I TOTALLY would rather have a needle in my spine? The kid shows up needing to be taken care of no matter how the labor went? Who cares?

I seriously don't get it. I have a friend who did the Bradley class thing and still cries, four years later, when she talks about her emergency C section. She was so disappointed not to give birth "naturally". Ok, Bradley method classes cost around $300 and take twelve weeks! For that level of commitment I would expect to be a first responder or something by the time I was done! And childbirth is such a crapshoot--you just have no idea what's going to happen until you're finished with it. It's just gnarly, gnarly nature at its finest. Give me a hospital with modern equipment and trained, well-paid, round the clock professionals every day of the week. Praise God for modern medicine.


I'm a red panda

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Re: Midwife vs Hospital
« Reply #61 on: September 28, 2016, 04:47:56 PM »
I hate how in america women place pressure on other women in how a birth is done.  There is the feeling that you are a better mother if you can do it "naturally" and drug free makes you the best of all.   

Women should never feel that a difficult birth is their fault or that an easy one was a sign of their preparedness. 

If it was all mind over matter then I would recommend dula at home.  It is not, giving birth is one of the most dangerous things that a women goes through.  Prepare as if it will be difficult and pray that it will be easy...

Maybe I just don't understand

My reasons for a natural birth have nothing to do with superiority to others. I refuse an epidural because having been paralyzed before I will never purposefully do something that leaves me conscious without being able to feel my legs (or arms). The IV meds they offer pass to the baby and I don't want NICU monitoring for withdraw to prevent me from getting time to bond right after birth.  With my first I gladly had Demerol (which I hated), but I'm hoping this one is born alive, so it's not an option.

purple monkey

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Re: Midwife vs Hospital
« Reply #62 on: September 28, 2016, 07:31:08 PM »
I hate how in america women place pressure on other women in how a birth is done.  There is the feeling that you are a better mother if you can do it "naturally" and drug free makes you the best of all.   

Women should never feel that a difficult birth is their fault or that an easy one was a sign of their preparedness. 

If it was all mind over matter then I would recommend dula at home.  It is not, giving birth is one of the most dangerous things that a women goes through.  Prepare as if it will be difficult and pray that it will be easy...

Maybe I just don't understand

Yes, it is easier to make it competitive and blame each other and the truth does not come out.

We are mammals, we have hair, have live births, and feed milk to our young.

Birth is safe the majority of the time, getting any medication is dangerous.

Thank you big PHARMA. Doing your biggest lobby ever job efficiently.

ALWAYS good to be in OZ.

Remember MMM folks, the truth about FIRE is not known by the majority either.

Birth is the same concept.

http://www.trustbirth.com

Peace. Out.
« Last Edit: September 28, 2016, 07:32:58 PM by purple monkey »

obstinate

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Re: Midwife vs Hospital
« Reply #63 on: October 02, 2016, 03:07:04 PM »
Birth is safe the majority of the time, getting any medication is dangerous.
Neither of these statements is true. Birth comes out alright the majority of the time, but it is not safe. The majority of people who climb Mt Everest survive, but climbing Mt Everest is not safe.

Your segment of the natural birth movement likes to claim that epidurals and induction are dangerous, but there is zero scientific evidence to this effect.

Also, accusing people who disagree with you of being shills? On this forum? Really? Pretty sure big pharma doesn't give a shit what people on a small early retirement forum think.

Some true things are not known to the majority of people. But there are many other things the majority of people don't believe which are false. Your claims are among them. Just because FIRE works doesn't mean that every fringe belief is suddenly true.
« Last Edit: October 02, 2016, 03:12:49 PM by obstinate »

RetiredAt63

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Re: Midwife vs Hospital
« Reply #64 on: October 02, 2016, 03:24:07 PM »
Yes, it is easier to make it competitive and blame each other and the truth does not come out.
We are mammals, we have hair, have live births, and feed milk to our young.
Birth is safe the majority of the time, getting any medication is dangerous.
Thank you big PHARMA. Doing your biggest lobby ever job efficiently.
ALWAYS good to be in OZ.

The higher primates (monkeys and especially apes) are known for hazardous births.  Its that stupid big head and the changes in the pelvis from being more upright.  Our species, the most upright-walking one with the biggest heads, is at the most danger from childbirth.  There is nothing like watching a mouse give birth  (so so easy) to realize how non-standard our biological group is. We are non-standard in a lot of other ways too, BTW.

Other species that have difficult births, or births in difficult circumstances, also normally have attendants (think whales).  So women talking to other women about childbirth seems completely "natural" to me, we want/need the support.  Plus wild animals do die in childbirth, babies are born dead or die young, it is not always easy. 

Natural =/= easy.  Natural =/= safe.