Joint from day 1 (or, like, day 25 after I got my name changed I guess) with a joint savings, joint checking, and joint credit card. We each get $80 in cash each month for all non-need purchases including: workday lunches out, coffee/drinks with friends, makeup, golf accessories/rounds, hobbies, extra gym classes, want-not-need clothes purchases, non-date night entertainment or music, etc. We did $60/month while we were still paying off debt. It's really only cash so that we don't have to worry about tracking all those mostly tiny purchases in the tracker app.
We met at work in a job where we were each making 25k/year and each living alone with the same 60 mi/day commute - back when gas was pushing $4. He had 55k in student loan debt but neither of us had consumer debt. That is to say, we knew how to live cheaply and not rack up debt because of it, so we kept up that attitude even when our combined income increased by 60%. Once we made it our goal to pay off the loans asap, it was very easy to work together to create a monthly budget, and in our admittedly short 2+ years of marriage, we haven't had a single instance of someone disregarding the budget or a single fight about how money should be spent.
I applaud any couples who have mastered open and fruitful communication about money while keeping things separate, but whenever I think about keeping a running tally of who owes whom or constantly venmo'ing my spouse to keep things fair, it stresses me out.
