Ok, I just went through and actually read all of what came before my earlier comment. (Sorry, I glossed through the first time.) I really sympathize with how your wife is feeling--I so wanted to exclusively breastfeed my girl, but due to complications with the emergency c-section I had my milk didn't come in for about a week and then my supply was really low for a while. Disappointment, raging hormones, and exhaustion mixed to make me feel really bad about the fact that I needed to supplement. And, she had latch issues which made it really painful at first. I had two big sores on my nipples. Ouch!
Our hospital sent a lactation consultant to me as well but, honestly, I was so out of it at the hospital that I barely heard a word she said. It wasn't until I was out of the hospital and feeling a little better that I was able to really take in what a lactation nurse told me. And, outside of the hospital the nurse stayed with us for over an hour diagnosing problems and helping to resolve them. She did several follow-ups over the next week, too, and since I did have to supplement she helped show me how to use a feeding tube at the breast, giving my body the stimulation it needed to produce more milk.
It can be really, really tough on a new mom! She might not want to hear advice, but it can be really helpful. At the very least, the important thing is to let her know that she's not a failure and that you support her no matter what. So many people get up in arms over breast or formula and it's CRAZY. She might be feeling a little crazy too. The first time my lactation consultant asked about the birth, I burst into tears. I didn't, and still don't, feel bad about how everything happened, but I couldn't stop crying and felt like a lunatic. Didn't help me at all, to feel crazy on top of everything else. And I did not even have PPD/PPA, this was just normal post-pregnancy stuff.
She can totally do this, if she'd still like to. It will take time, and it will be work. But feeding a newborn is always going to be a lot of work, no matter how it's done, and she might feel better about herself if she can get some measurable success.
If she does want to keep trying, have her eat galactogogues, the lactation-boosting foods and teas. And try, as much as possible, to make things relaxing for her. No mom ever produced tons of milk when she was stressed out and exhausted.
Good luck, no matter what you and your wife decide! And congrats on the little one. :)