The Money Mustache Community

Learning, Sharing, and Teaching => Ask a Mustachian => Topic started by: MrsCoolCat on June 28, 2015, 03:37:15 PM

Title: Job interview, Pregnancy & an Injured Husband
Post by: MrsCoolCat on June 28, 2015, 03:37:15 PM
Hi MMM-ers. So my husband was injured (post about Medical Bills and Bartering), might be out for up to 6 weeks and the bills will set us back probably at least $11.5k. There goes vacation/PTO to be used. My boss is a crazy bipolar inefficient nut case (post about Horrible Bosses and F.I.R.E), but the company is great, good benefits and I definitely have better health insurance than my husband. I have an in person job interview this Wednesday (that I haven't confirmed yet; I'll do it tomorrow), but after the fact realized I shot myself in the foot by only asking for $4-$8k more than what I currently make (my heart was not there and my mind was out of it) during the phone interview this past Wednesday. It doesn't help that I'm scheduled to interview with 4 ppl over the course of 3 hours for this Wednesday. It makes me not even want to bother even though I'm curious and weighing my options. I also like my current company, job & department but I could go into the psych ward from my crazy stupid lazy boss. I can tolerate her though. My other possible dilemmas mainly include we wanna get pregnant this yr and we're crossing our fingers at the big law firm job he interviewed for the day before he got hurt. Long shot I know but it's to be factored before even considering changing jobs (in regards to me bc he'd definitely accept a new job) esp the pregnancy bc despite all this I really do not need or want to be a mom after 35. Any opinions? Thank everyone always! 😃
Title: Re: Job interview, Pregnancy & an Injured Husband
Post by: lbmustache on June 28, 2015, 07:48:18 PM
A few things for me:

- If your health insurance is much better than your husband's, why is he not covered under your employer?
- You say your boss is terrible, and "crazy and stupid" and enough to send you into the "psych ward," but then you "can tolerate her?" How bad is it?
-Do you want to be out of this job, and is $4k-$8k extra worth it? Are the benefits the same or better at the new job? Is it a longer or shorter commute?
- Go to the interview. People flake out on interviews but here's the thing... you don't have to accept the job if they offer it.
- If they offer you something on the low end of $4k you might be able to say you were hoping for something closer to $6k-$8k.

And... I hesitate to say this... but can you afford a baby? $11k medical bills and you're banking on your husband getting a new job?
Title: Re: Job interview, Pregnancy & an Injured Husband
Post by: ShoulderThingThatGoesUp on June 28, 2015, 07:53:24 PM
You have an EF, right? You're going to be OK. You will feel better once your husband is doing better. Don't worry about getting pregnant later this year right now, you have enough going on.
Title: Re: Job interview, Pregnancy & an Injured Husband
Post by: MrsCoolCat on June 28, 2015, 08:04:30 PM
Thank you. Answers within:

A few things for me:

- If your health insurance is much better than your husband's, why is he not covered under your employer?
Still 5x the cost of mine per pay period bc that's how most plans are. He's on my dental plus regrettably who'd predict this sorta thing to happen!
- You say your boss is terrible, and "crazy and stupid" and enough to send you into the "psych ward," but then you "can tolerate her?" How bad is it?
http://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/welcome-to-the-forum/horrible-bosses-(and-fire)!/msg528706/#msg528706
Craziest nut job I've ever worked for but I have a feeling that she's so lazy & dumb she needs me. She can be very stressful but at the end of the day I still leave at 5:30pm despite her shenanigans... I have to be one step ahead of her and I usually am.
-Do you want to be out of this job, and is $4k-$8k extra worth it? Are the benefits the same or better at the new job? Is it a longer or shorter commute?
Yes, to shorter commute. All that other stuff idk yet...
- Go to the interview. People flake out on interviews but here's the thing... you don't have to accept the job if they offer it.
That was my initial thoughts, too.
- If they offer you something on the low end of $4k you might be able to say you were hoping for something closer to $6k-$8k.
Yes, I know it's not professional but if it comes down to it I'm just gonna tell em straight about the salary.

And... I hesitate to say this... but can you afford a baby?
Yes.
$11k medical bills and you're banking on your husband getting a new job?
EF and we could afford a baby even without a new job bc we are Mustachian enough and the salary increase would be an added bonus, but it would totally ruin me if I took that new job bc it's closer than my current job but in the total opposite direction of the husband's "would be job". We'd probably move closer to his. It's all just in the air right now. I REALLY hate Florida traffic.
Title: Re: Job interview, Pregnancy & an Injured Husband
Post by: MrsCoolCat on June 28, 2015, 08:12:31 PM
You have an EF, right? You're going to be OK. You will feel better once your husband is doing better. Don't worry about getting pregnant later this year right now, you have enough going on.

Thanks. Yea, one step at a time but the timing is totally off. Guess that's pretty much life.
Title: Re: Job interview, Pregnancy & an Injured Husband
Post by: Insanity on June 28, 2015, 08:34:35 PM
One easy way around the 4-8K is...  Well, that was assuming a different overall package. 

I went all the way through an offer and they kept asking me if I was interested and I kept saying yes.  They then made the offer and I turned it down.  Why?  Because they wouldn't do telecommuting and there was no way they would go to the dollars it would take to cover the commute costs.

Title: Re: Job interview, Pregnancy & an Injured Husband
Post by: little_brown_dog on June 29, 2015, 08:25:11 AM
despite all this I really do not need or want to be a mom after 35. Any opinions? Thank everyone always! 😃

as a pregnant mama to another hopefully soon-to-be mama: it is best to let go of idealized timelines and plans before you start trying to conceive, or else you will drive yourself and your spouse crazy when the time comes. very few women get their perfect pregnancy plans - most of us either get pregnant too soon, too late, experience infertility, miscarriages (my story), or just seriously struggle with the natural pregnancy changes like morning sickness, severe fatigue, etc. i know it is hard, but if you can practice letting go now, it will help you immensely when the time comes. you are taking care of what you need to do right now so you can be a parent tomorrow. let that be good enough.
Title: Re: Job interview, Pregnancy & an Injured Husband
Post by: I'm a red panda on June 29, 2015, 08:37:05 AM
Will your husband qualify for any short term disability?  Everywhere I've worked, If I was out that length of time, after all pto/vacation/sick was used, we'd get 1/2 pay on STD.


I agree with the previous poster too- if everyone waited for the right time to have a kid, no one would ever have one.  I wouldn't worry about the other stuff in your plans to have children.  You'll figure it out.
Title: Re: Job interview, Pregnancy & an Injured Husband
Post by: MrsCoolCat on June 29, 2015, 09:04:32 AM
Yep, thanks btw. I've come to grips with not being able to plan everything. Bloody hell look at my clumsy husband! Oh, the reason leading to why he fell does not need to be disclosed bc it was that silly (at least he acknowledged it). Definitely can't plan everyth esp pregnancy. I'm sorry to hear about ur miscarriage. I would however, like some pregnancy tips just for my FYI/knowledge. I don't plan on knowing/learning everything before trying but while I still have time I'd like to educate myself. I'll prob search this forum & others before maybe starting a thread. Thnx again everyone! Also, we'll look into STD but he is hoping to work after surgery... Guess he's either optimistic, stubborn or both! I'm more of a realist.
Title: Re: Job interview, Pregnancy & an Injured Husband
Post by: okits on July 01, 2015, 08:33:03 PM
How did your interview go?
Title: Re: Job interview, Pregnancy & an Injured Husband
Post by: MrsCoolCat on July 01, 2015, 08:58:57 PM
Thanks for asking! I think it went well. More details later plus at this point I don't want to get my hopes up too high as they have a stringent background check that apparently includes salary check, too... who knows plus they are interviewing a few others and I was first. Let me just ride my optimism and have it spread even to my crazy boss tomorrow... :-)