Unfortunately we do not live on base. My husband is active duty Air National Guard, so there are limited resources for military families.
I don't take offense to the salary question, it would not make sense to pay someone 20 per hour if I am only making that.
I make between 80 and 100 dollars an hour, so it is worth paying someone to help me for the most part. I honestly don't love my work, but I don't hate it. I think if I had downtime after work, and I could be outside, I would not mind it. I have a great boss and it is somewhat flexible. I really struggle with being in front of a screen most of the day and the lack of interacting with people. My clinic job that pays on the higher end is actually very stressful, extremely busy and exhausting, and has the awful commute, so I don't think going back to that is the answer, but it does provide a social outlet. Again, if money were no issue I would take a complete break from work, but it is part of the equation, and I am not willing to give up my salary at this point.
As far as the kids activities, my daughter only goes to lessons for one instrument, the other she does at school, so that is rarely an issue for me. Their activities are really not bad, it is everything else that is medical related right now. One has dance twice a week, the other has music once a week and then on saturdays they have dance. It is the therapy, shots, orthodontist.....I keep thinking it will get better, but this has been the last 2 years, it just changes with what appointments are necessary.
If I could outsource the things I do not need to be there for it would really help. I did put in an add for help 3 days a week for 2 hours and upped pay to 20 an hour, hopefully something will work out. I am also going to ask for another 2 days off a month, I feel like I just need more freedom in my life and even with outsourcing I still am tired of working 5 days a week.