So much good advice! You guys are awesome!
Yes, manual is an option if I can find it. I haven't driven stick in 15 years but it's like riding a bike, right? Is manual a "bad" option for some cars or is it almost always to be preferred?
Definitely think I need snow tires if I go with a smaller car. Maybe could get away with all-seasons on an Outback. I am not a natural or comfortable driver, the library almost never closes, and I have to drive my kids to school all winter. I may be able to make storage space on my covered balcony now that the XFP is going to be storing the children's bikes. (3 blocks from my apartment.)
Didn't know Impreza made a hatchback--will add that to my list. Newer Outbacks, like 2010+, seem to be better than the older ones.
I do not believe that I drive enough to make a Prius worthwhile. There are only 145K miles on my 1999 Accord (which I have owned for 12 years). The low total driving miles keeps Outbacks on the "maybe" list--I don't need something that big but if I find a good one, the gas won't break me. (llhamo is right--I don't have anywhere to plug in.)
Here's my current thinking:
MUST HAVES: ABS brakes, side curtain airbags, and ESC. If I'm going to get a newer car, it should be safer!
First choices: Fit, Vibe, Matrix
Strong maybes: Mazda 3 hatchback, Nissan Versa, Mazda 5 (I really want those sliding doors!)
3rd tier maybes: Subaru Outback/Impreza, Kia Soul
4th tier maybes: Civic, Corolla (I kind of have my heart set on a hatchback. And I like my Accord, but I think you pay too much for the size and general niceness)
That's pre-test-drive, of course. The only one I have driven personally is a Fit, although my sister swears by her Mazda 5.