I'll try to get to the point:
Mother asks me whether she should buy the car, a hyundai eon, for me. It's currently priced at roughly 440K philippine pesos due to a promo.
Her reasons for buying me a car? She wants me to learn how to drive. Hopefully, those skills will benefit me in the future.
My sister who's based in Hawaii took driving lessons there. That's where my mom got the idea.
I told her no, for the nth time. That was when she told me that my pessimism was rearing its ugly head. If i kept doing what i was doing, i could never afford what i want. She kept repeating her reasons, and told me i got good with my bike because i always rode it. If i got good with my bike, i would get good with my car. She then told me it would be an asset, and she would place it under my name. I answered i didnt want a liability. She had already given me two liabilities (a health insurance and monthly postpaid plan) that she bought for me. Because i felt embarrassed that i was a 20 year old, i told her i would pay for it. I still am. I have 2 more years to go.
I actually blew and told her that it was fine of she wanted to purchase the car. But i wasn't going to pay for it, nor use it, nor pay fuel for it. She paid for the car, so it's hers.
She finally told me that she was buying the car for me, but if i wasn't interested in it, then she won't buy it anymore.
I won, but strangely, i feel bereft. I don't know why.
You see, i know my mom has a bunch of outstanding credit card debt. I also know she failed to pay for her monthly health card insurance. I know how much her take home pay is. I also know how she hid the fact from me that she was financially struggling to allow me to finish my 4th year in college. It was after that incident that i became frugal. That i decided to become financially literate.
I want to buy a car, yes. I want it. But i don't need it right now. It's not my priority. My priority is to eliminate my debt. Establish my 3 month emergency fund. Give my tithes. Invest 1/3 of my monthly salary in stocks. Spend money on what makes me happy (it happens to be making art, or creating stuff). When i buy a car, i want to pay it full cold hard cash. I dont want to pay monthly installments for it. When my mom told me she wanted to buy a car, i immediately thought of MMM. How unmustaschian.
Another reason why i dont want the car is what i learned from being a mustachian. Remember the hedonic adaptation? Yeah, mom and i will be happy... for awhile hedonic adaptation will set in and all we'll be left is a cute & shiny depreciating car, with a monthly payment we have to pay for xxx years.
I love my mom. But i feel bereft. One reason i think she's trying to push the car on me, is to alleviate her guilty feelings. You see, a couple of months ago, i had an admirer who texted me. I never replied. Mom urged me to respond to the text. So i developed feelings for the guy. However, this month, the guy had to be reassigned in another area (he's a police official). The guy told me he would stop communicating with me (which he did). It broke my heart (i'vr recovered). I think my mom feels guilty because she was the one who pushed me to the guy.
Or maybe i feel bereft because the car is for sale on a promo???
... and that's one lengthy post. I just wanted to share it. Any discussion...any opinion is highly appreciated.