Author Topic: Husband Offered Job--How to Handle Other Companies He's Interviewing With  (Read 4174 times)

Laurel

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Hi, all--wondering if anyone can provide any insight on our current situation.

My husband was offered a job this morning after about 6 months of looking. It sounds like a great fit and he'd be well compensated (good salary, benefits, etc.). He needs to accept or decline the offer by Monday, 8/29.

However, he's currently the finalist for two other companies that he's been interviewing with--one indicated yesterday they'd like to move forward with him and sent him some HR paperwork to fill out (basic stuff like references, etc.) that we *think* is the formalities they have to go through prior to a job offer which they could offer in a matter of days, possibly a week or two. The other company has a scheduled second (and final) interview scheduled for 9/3, and hubs is pretty confident he will get an offer from them as well.

My questions:

The current job offer LOOKS like the best fit (without knowing exact salary and benefits for the other two companies) at this point. Should my husband take the job and stop the process with the other two companies? Try to continue with the other two and put off accepting the current offer on the table (seems risky to me?)? Let the other two companies know that this offer exists and that if they'd like to hurry up already, they should do so (and how in the world do we ask that?)? Hubs and I are both professionals on our first jobs (he'll now be transitioning to his second "real" job) and we've never dealt with these issues before.

Ha. Lots of questions. A great "problem" to have after a pretty discouraging 6 months of job hunting.

I know it's hard to offer advice without knowing all the details but the MMM community is a pretty smart group so I'm holding out hope that one of you can offer some additional insight that we may not have thought of. :) Thanks in advance.
« Last Edit: August 25, 2016, 11:20:26 AM by Laurel »

Axecleaver

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This comes up more often than you might think. Company 1 gave you an offer, Co2 and Co3 are potential offers. Ideally, you'd like the offers to arrive at roughly the same time, so that you can choose the best one. So your job now is to get the other offers on the table ASAP, and delay decisionmaking for the offer you have.

* ASAP, but no later than Monday, 8/29, tell Company One that you have two other offers pending, and you'd like until after Labor Day to give them your decision. They should comply. If they don't, accept the offer, you can always quit later.
* Tell Company Two and Three that you have an offer on the table. Ask if you can move up dates, although usually you won't be able to do this. If they ask, tell them the terms you've been given. This gives them an incentive to provide better terms, and you'll get points for transparency.
* Be willing to negotiate soft comp terms - things like telecommute privileges, flexible schedules, additional vacation, expense account, company car, better equipment. Hard comp (salary, bonus) is sometimes much tougher to negotiate.
* Make sure to value benefits and commuting costs, not just salary, to compare apples to apples.

The advice "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" applies. Be careful in your dealings with Co1, since that's the bird in the hand. They're within their rights to rescind the offer if you push too hard.  Your process sounds pretty early with Co2 and Co3 though, and could take months to finalize. You're better off accepting Co1 and continuing discussions with the others. Timing is everything, and backing out with Co2 and Co3 if you must, won't be held against you if you're honest.

I'm a red panda

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My current job I called and told them I had another offer and needed a response. They called back the next day with a way better offer :)

nobody123

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If company 1 is the best fit and you have an offer that is acceptable to you, take it.  If he's been out of work 6 months, are you willing to risk 6 more months if he doesn't get an offer from 2 or 3?  It's always easier to negotiate another job while you're currently employed, anyway.  He can always interview again in 6 months or so.

The only way I'd try to stall with company 1 is if they were completely lowballing you on salary.  If they're paying below market, that job will likely still be open in a couple of weeks after you conclude your interviews with 2 and 3.

frugaliknowit

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"A bird in the hand..."

You can keep the negotiations going with #2 and #3, if you want, though that would be pretty stressful.

lthenderson

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My first choice would be to call the first company and tell them that two other companies are in the process of making offers and you need another week to decide. This most often results in a better offer from the first company to get you to accept before the other offers. Many will also give you the time rather than hire someone that might quit right away if another better offer comes along.

If that doesn't work, call the other companies and tell them you need to make a decision in the next few days. Sometimes they can speed things up especially if they are just going through the last stages of an interview to finalize the details. However, with only a couple working days inbetween and 8/29, I doubt this will work for you.

My final option is to accept the first companies offer and continue to go through the interviewing process with the other two. If you find that one of the other two is better than the one you have already accepted, you can quit before you even start working there but you will definitely be burning a bridge in doing so preventing you from going back to that company in the future.  Lots of companies have several steps after you formally except an offer with them that buys you time. Many do drug screenings, have paperwork that needs to be filled out and you also have the ability to negotiate your start date to give you time to complete the other job interviews.

Laurel

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Lots of great things to think about--thanks, all! Definitely keeping in mind the "bird in hand" idea and do NOT want to do anything to jeopardize that offer. Hubs is currently employed, so there isn't huge pressure, nobody123, but still...he definitely wants a new job.

I think we may do some combination of letting the other 2 companies know about the offer on the table and possibly asking for an extension on accepting Job Offer 1. But Job 1 (who gave hubs the offer) does really seem like the best fit so...

Complicating matters a little bit is the fact that our first kid is due in T-2 weeks...my brain cannot even function right now. So I MUCH appreciate all of your thoughts.

nobody123

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Sorry, I misunderstood the 6-month search comment in your original post.  Advice remains the same, though.  What do you expect out of the other two offers that would trump the opportunity you already have?  Or is it more of the fact you'd rather see two more offers to validate your opinion that 1 is the best fit?  Either way, 1 is better than current job, so you can't really lose by taking it.

Congrats on the baby!

Capsu78

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I will only add that usually gap exists between "accepting an offer" and actual on boarding... I have seen candidates "fall through" right up until the agreed first day of employment; usually the "Hey, no hard feelings, it's just business" is acceptable since they still have an active group of other candidates. Frustrating but acceptable.  Ethically on the left side of the graph.
Now , start the actual  job, and quit 3 weeks in, after other candidate notifications have been made is much more frustrating and clearly on the other side of the ethical equation...and I have seen that too.

retiringearly

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I would accept the current offer and stop interviewing with the other companies.  I do my best to live by my word.  I would not accept an offer and continue interviewing with other companies. 

Roboturner

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* ASAP, but no later than Monday, 8/29, tell Company One that you have two other offers pending, and you'd like until after Labor Day to give them your decision. They should comply. If they don't, accept the offer, you can always quit later.
* Tell Company Two and Three that you have an offer on the table. Ask if you can move up dates, although usually you won't be able to do this. If they ask, tell them the terms you've been given. This gives them an incentive to provide better terms, and you'll get points for transparency.
* Be willing to negotiate soft comp terms - things like telecommute privileges, flexible schedules, additional vacation, expense account, company car, better equipment. Hard comp (salary, bonus) is sometimes much tougher to negotiate.
* Make sure to value benefits and commuting costs, not just salary, to compare apples to apples.

THIS, don't sell yourself short, they are trying to be pushy to bully you [your SO] out of shopping around. It's all due diligence on your part, at least make sure you have the best deal before signing up to be a wage slave.

999/1000 times waiting a week or so isn't going to KILL the company (although they might make it seem so), it's just a bully tactic
« Last Edit: August 25, 2016, 04:20:36 PM by Roboturner »

dividendman

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Now , start the actual  job, and quit 3 weeks in, after other candidate notifications have been made is much more frustrating and clearly on the other side of the ethical equation...

Why is this "clearly" on the other side of some mysterious ethical equation? It's business. They could lay you off/fire you after 3 weeks too, is that unethical?

Capsu78

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Now , start the actual  job, and quit 3 weeks in, after other candidate notifications have been made is much more frustrating and clearly on the other side of the ethical equation...

Why is this "clearly" on the other side of some mysterious ethical equation? It's business. They could lay you off/fire you after 3 weeks too, is that unethical?

If some hiring manager has invested in a interview process not only with you, but with all the other candidates, and you quit 3 weeks after all of the other candidates have been told "thanks, but we went in another direction", and you have been onboarded,  I would consider it unprofessional in the least, if the reason wasn't related to something more significant than "I know we agreed to go to the prom, but now I want to go with someone prettier" test drive... I have seen the scenario happen to completely above board hiring managers who simply needed to get the spot filled and move on to other business problems.
 If some "mysterious ethical equation" is to complicated to understand, let me rephrase it as "good business karma" vs "less good business karma".  If you feel that they are equivalent events- we simply do our maths differently.

dividendman

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If some hiring manager has invested in a interview process not only with you, but with all the other candidates, and you quit 3 weeks after all of the other candidates have been told "thanks, but we went in another direction", and you have been onboarded,  I would consider it unprofessional in the least, if the reason wasn't related to something more significant than "I know we agreed to go to the prom, but now I want to go with someone prettier" test drive... I have seen the scenario happen to completely above board hiring managers who simply needed to get the spot filled and move on to other business problems.
 If some "mysterious ethical equation" is to complicated to understand, let me rephrase it as "good business karma" vs "less good business karma".  If you feel that they are equivalent events- we simply do our maths differently.

Perhaps, but as I consistently point out on these forums: there seems to be a double standard with regards to what is acceptable for a business to do and yet not acceptable for the employee of the business.

I asked above: If the business lays off an employee they hire 3 weeks in, is that unethical?

The vast majority of employment is at will, meaning the either party can part ways at any time with or without notice, for any reason (except those protected under law). I bet it even says that the employment is "at will" right in the contract the OP is signing. What's the point of writing that in if you can't take advantage of it just like the business does?

You seem to really care about the plight of the hiring manager. Yes, the hiring manager did work. That manager gets paid right? Presumably to hire people. Yes other people were turned down, the hiring manager is free to reach out to those people right? So the hiring manager has to do some work, big deal.

Capsu78

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If some hiring manager has invested in a interview process not only with you, but with all the other candidates, and you quit 3 weeks after all of the other candidates have been told "thanks, but we went in another direction", and you have been onboarded,  I would consider it unprofessional in the least, if the reason wasn't related to something more significant than "I know we agreed to go to the prom, but now I want to go with someone prettier" test drive... I have seen the scenario happen to completely above board hiring managers who simply needed to get the spot filled and move on to other business problems.
 If some "mysterious ethical equation" is to complicated to understand, let me rephrase it as "good business karma" vs "less good business karma".  If you feel that they are equivalent events- we simply do our maths differently.

Perhaps, but as I consistently point out on these forums: there seems to be a double standard with regards to what is acceptable for a business to do and yet not acceptable for the employee of the business.

I asked above: If the business lays off an employee they hire 3 weeks in, is that unethical?

The vast majority of employment is at will, meaning the either party can part ways at any time with or without notice, for any reason (except those protected under law). I bet it even says that the employment is "at will" right in the contract the OP is signing. What's the point of writing that in if you can't take advantage of it just like the business does?

You seem to really care about the plight of the hiring manager. Yes, the hiring manager did work. That manager gets paid right? Presumably to hire people. Yes other people were turned down, the hiring manager is free to reach out to those people right? So the hiring manager has to do some work, big deal.

I had a long (loyal) corporate/consulting career and I just can't recall any times where I saw someone laid off 3 weeks after hire.  I have seen the other scenario a number of times, so maybe my concerns for the hiring manager are biased because I actually saw how things played out.

That being said, from my own experiences as the hiring manager, my new hires knew the corporate policy was that you started under a 90 day probationary period anyway, so if you were "time clock" challenged or had a lifestyle "too complicated" (Sorry, band had a gig last night that went long)  for my reliable prediction that you would be ready to get working at the agreed upon time, then yes, I was MY job to "create the circumstances" to free that employee of the burdens the working world- at least my working world!  I have always held the observation that in the first 90 days of employment, every employee flashes their long term probability for success-  If they aren't 5 minutes early every day, chances are they aren't going to precise with their "rush hour traffic pattern" predictive skills.  (Sorry Boss, caught in traffic...uh, I drive the same highways as you)  If they seem to have a lot of "Where's Waldo?" moments between their work station and the copy machine, then yes, you are in for wondering where Waldo is more often than was indicated in the hiring process.  If I needed overtime, which was comped at 1 1/2 rate,  then, yes, I was going to pull out your application to see if you checked the "Available for overtime?" box on your application, even if you did score tickets to see U2 that same weekend as Quarter Close.!  In fact, I was always amazed that when an employee had to be "separated", the person who hired that person wasn't held a bit accountable by the corporation! 

It might just be a generational expectations difference between us :-)  The concept of "loyal" was a 2 way street: has been greatly repurposed over the course of my career.
« Last Edit: August 26, 2016, 12:49:31 PM by Capsu78 »

BlueHouse

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I had a long (loyal) corporate/consulting career and I just can't recall any times where I saw someone laid off 3 weeks after hire.  I have seen the other scenario a number of times, so maybe my concerns for the hiring manager are biased because I actually saw how things played out.

I worked at a company where 6 people were slated to start on a Monday.  On the Thursday preceding, the company announced layoffs to the rest of the company.  Friday before the Monday, the company told all 6 to delay their start date one week.  Following Monday rolls around, all 6 show up and all 6 get told there are no jobs for them.  No severance, no warning, nothing. 

It made the rest of us realize that there was no loyalty at this company and any loyalty we had, went by the wayside that day.  Sucked.

Oh, and then about 6 weeks later, the CEO's son and his 5 best friends from Princeton all got hired for summer work. 

Capsu78

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I had a long (loyal) corporate/consulting career and I just can't recall any times where I saw someone laid off 3 weeks after hire.  I have seen the other scenario a number of times, so maybe my concerns for the hiring manager are biased because I actually saw how things played out.

I worked at a company where 6 people were slated to start on a Monday.  On the Thursday preceding, the company announced layoffs to the rest of the company.  Friday before the Monday, the company told all 6 to delay their start date one week.  Following Monday rolls around, all 6 show up and all 6 get told there are no jobs for them.  No severance, no warning, nothing. 

It made the rest of us realize that there was no loyalty at this company and any loyalty we had, went by the wayside that day.  Sucked.

Oh, and then about 6 weeks later, the CEO's son and his 5 best friends from Princeton all got hired for summer work.

Ouch!  Yes I have always advised to not consider a job landed until the first paycheck arrives and clears the bank!  The "Our Employee are out greatest assets" speech was believable when I started my career, was a common boiler plate platitude mid career and simply a "knee slapper gaffaw" by the time I was wrapping up my working days! 

chasesfish

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If he's currently unemployed, then I would find something really small to counter on to extend the window to accept it.

The conversation should go "I really appreciate the offer and expect I'm coming to work for you.  What do you think about X"  He can also ask to see some additional details around insurance/retirement benefits.  Use that to buy a couple of days and he can tell the others that he's about to accept an offer.

He could accept the offer and still keep interviewing with the others, but I would NOT play that game if currently unemployed.

Laurel

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UPDATE to OP

To preface: we fall into the camp that we would not feel comfortable proceeding with other companies after DH accepts an offer.

On Thursday (day DH received Offer 1), he called company 2 and let them know about the offer, and they extended him an offer that day as well. 2 offers on the table! Unfortunately (or not? made the decision easy), the offer was based on his current salary and not the outstanding offer's salary, which meant that base salary was about 20% lower than Offer 1. DH is going to decline it without countering, as he thinks there is NO way they would up the base salary as much as he would need to even begin considering the offer. He liked company 1 better anyway, before knowing any details about salary, benefits, etc.

DH accepted the offer from company 1 on Saturday and is putting in his 2-weeks notice today at his current job. His last day will be the due date for our first kiddo, so I'm the ONLY pregnant woman in the history of forever to be hoping that baby stays put for the time being. Ha!

We'll also let company 3 (final procedural interview this Friday) know that DH has accepted the offer and cancel the interview. DH was also not as excited about this company than company 1, so he's fine not trying to drag an offer out of them as well.

In the end, the decision was very clear, which is all we could ask for. And DH was able to eliminate some "what-if" questions by receiving offer 2, which is nice for our peace of mind. We're celebrating!

Captain FIRE

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I agree that I would judge a company and employee the same for terminating employment 3 weeks in - poorly, absent unusual circumstances (e.g. employee is stealing, employee's close relative is dying).

That being said, from my own experiences as the hiring manager, my new hires knew the corporate policy was that you started under a 90 day probationary period anyway, so if you were "time clock" challenged or had a lifestyle "too complicated" (Sorry, band had a gig last night that went long)  for my reliable prediction that you would be ready to get working at the agreed upon time, then yes, I was MY job to "create the circumstances" to free that employee of the burdens the working world- at least my working world!  I have always held the observation that in the first 90 days of employment, every employee flashes their long term probability for success-  If they aren't 5 minutes early every day, chances are they aren't going to precise with their "rush hour traffic pattern" predictive skills.  (Sorry Boss, caught in traffic...uh, I drive the same highways as you)  If they seem to have a lot of "Where's Waldo?" moments between their work station and the copy machine, then yes, you are in for wondering where Waldo is more often than was indicated in the hiring process.  If I needed overtime, which was comped at 1 1/2 rate,  then, yes, I was going to pull out your application to see if you checked the "Available for overtime?" box on your application, even if you did score tickets to see U2 that same weekend as Quarter Close.!

Are you assuming that "available for overtime" means "when you click your fingers"?  I'd check the available box if it meant I'm open to it, and might agree to it depending on the circumstances.  To me it means I'm open to a request/offer, it doesn't mean you own me 24/7 anytime you want me to work.  (For example, if I have plans to fly to a friend's wedding, it'd take a lot for me to agree to bail on it.  If I have plans to attend a sibling's wedding, nothing will make me agree to bail on it.  If I have dinner plans with a friend, I'll reschedule the dinner.)

Do you really penalize people during a probationary period who meet the requirements you set (being on time), but don't go beyond (by arriving early to work)?  That seems pretty unfair to me.  By all means, end the relationship if the person isn't meeting requirements such as showing up on time or doing the work, but to terminate employment because you expect more than you've asked for doesn't sit well with me.

momcpa

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Sounds like your husband made the right choice.  If the offer appeared to be good at the beginning of the process, and still sounds good..........then he/you picked the right one.

Good luck to him on the job and to both of you on the new baby !!!!!!!!

Capsu78

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I agree that I would judge a company and employee the same for terminating employment 3 weeks in - poorly, absent unusual circumstances (e.g. employee is stealing, employee's close relative is dying).

That being said, from my own experiences as the hiring manager, my new hires knew the corporate policy was that you started under a 90 day probationary period anyway, so if you were "time clock" challenged or had a lifestyle "too complicated" (Sorry, band had a gig last night that went long)  for my reliable prediction that you would be ready to get working at the agreed upon time, then yes, I was MY job to "create the circumstances" to free that employee of the burdens the working world- at least my working world!  I have always held the observation that in the first 90 days of employment, every employee flashes their long term probability for success-  If they aren't 5 minutes early every day, chances are they aren't going to precise with their "rush hour traffic pattern" predictive skills.  (Sorry Boss, caught in traffic...uh, I drive the same highways as you)  If they seem to have a lot of "Where's Waldo?" moments between their work station and the copy machine, then yes, you are in for wondering where Waldo is more often than was indicated in the hiring process.  If I needed overtime, which was comped at 1 1/2 rate,  then, yes, I was going to pull out your application to see if you checked the "Available for overtime?" box on your application, even if you did score tickets to see U2 that same weekend as Quarter Close.!

Are you assuming that "available for overtime" means "when you click your fingers"?  I'd check the available box if it meant I'm open to it, and might agree to it depending on the circumstances.  To me it means I'm open to a request/offer, it doesn't mean you own me 24/7 anytime you want me to work.  (For example, if I have plans to fly to a friend's wedding, it'd take a lot for me to agree to bail on it.  If I have plans to attend a sibling's wedding, nothing will make me agree to bail on it.  If I have dinner plans with a friend, I'll reschedule the dinner.)

Do you really penalize people during a probationary period who meet the requirements you set (being on time), but don't go beyond (by arriving early to work)?  That seems pretty unfair to me.  By all means, end the relationship if the person isn't meeting requirements such as showing up on time or doing the work, but to terminate employment because you expect more than you've asked for doesn't sit well with me.

No, not "snap of the fingers" at all- in fact I was always a pretty soft touch for allowing flexibility for pre arranged time off and make up opportunities particularly if the employee offered the solution to the situation.   However, when one person missing in a lean operation hamstrings the entire production schedule and others had to stop doing their own tasks to make up the gap resulting in a weeks production schedule getting snowed in, very well compensated overtime shouldn't have been a tooth pulling experience.  As for "penalizing", not a term I would use, but the probationary period is a 2 way street when it came to "first impressions" and much easier to determine "this is not going to work out for either of us" that waiting until someone has a year into a job.  As I said before, might be a generational thing and it was a different time.   I've actually enjoyed my final few career years working with 4 generations at the same time- but I would no want to manage people from that many!   

Laurel

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Sounds like your husband made the right choice.  If the offer appeared to be good at the beginning of the process, and still sounds good..........then he/you picked the right one.

Good luck to him on the job and to both of you on the new baby !!!!!!!!

Thank you! Lots of big life changes all at once...we're hanging on for dear life at this point. ;)