Author Topic: Husband left, single mom, student, no job, bad health...  (Read 5211 times)

micah_mae_

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Husband left, single mom, student, no job, bad health...
« on: September 13, 2013, 12:39:54 PM »
I am in the middle of a divorce, will have sole custody of 3 kids (under 5), no job or work experience since I've been raising the kids all this time. I'm going to school right now.
I will be getting $1500/mo child support and my parents want us to live in the front of their house (a separate living/sleeping/bathroom), just sharing a kitchen.

I need to get ahead but no ideas on how. STBX wants me to stay in charge of the finances until it's official so I'm frantically trying to pay off our upside down van (which I will get). I will come away with no consumer debt but I will have student loans and will have to pay insurance, gas and maintenance on the van. My parents live 30 min from where I go to school and the oldest child has special needs (lots of appts) so I must keep the van.

Another issue, I have health issues and will have no health insurance. I've had tricare my whole life, where and how do I get health insurance? What do I need to know? I am in the middle of treatment for precancer (cervical) if that matters..

Give me your wisdom.

jpo

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Re: Husband left, single mom, student, no job, bad health...
« Reply #1 on: September 13, 2013, 01:00:08 PM »
I would look into getting a health insurance policy so you don't have any lapses in coverage. It's my understanding that getting reinsured after a lapse can be tough, they may not pay for pre-existing conditions. YMMV.

micah_mae_

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Re: Husband left, single mom, student, no job, bad health...
« Reply #2 on: September 13, 2013, 01:02:49 PM »
Thanks, I've heard the same thing but everyone keeps telling me to apply for medicaid. But in order to do that I have to not have tricare, thus a lapse, o_O. I don't know anything about finding health insurance or what kind I need, I'm lost.

Jack

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Re: Husband left, single mom, student, no job, bad health...
« Reply #3 on: September 13, 2013, 01:13:43 PM »
I am in the middle of a divorce, will have sole custody of 3 kids (under 5), no job or work experience since I've been raising the kids all this time. I'm going to school right now.
I will be getting $1500/mo child support and my parents want us to live in the front of their house (a separate living/sleeping/bathroom), just sharing a kitchen.

Can your parents provide child care?

By the way, $1500/month is already over two thirds of the monthly budget of a bunch of the folks here (those who live in reasonably cheap areas, at least). That's not half bad, especially considering that you'll have zero housing cost. How long will you be able to stay with your parents, anyway?

I'm frantically trying to pay off our upside down van (which I will get).... My parents live 30 min from where I go to school and the oldest child has special needs (lots of appts) so I must keep the van.

Nope. You need a vehicle, but not necessarily "the van." Being upside down on it implies that it's probably relatively new; you need something cheaper (which probably correlates to older and smaller).

Can you skip paying off the van, let your ex keep it (and the associated debt) and just buy a cheap car to get around instead?

Thanks, I've heard the same thing but everyone keeps telling me to apply for medicaid. But in order to do that I have to not have tricare, thus a lapse, o_O. I don't know anything about finding health insurance or what kind I need, I'm lost.

I'm sure there's some state agency and/or non-profit organization that can help you figure out how that all works. Maybe try calling the department of family and children services, the department of labor, or one of your local politicians' offices for leads?

katheh

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Re: Husband left, single mom, student, no job, bad health...
« Reply #4 on: September 13, 2013, 01:16:15 PM »
As soon as you are no longer covered by Tricare (should be the rest of the month in which you are taken off the policy), apply for Medicaid. You can apply for Medicaid for your kids now. With no income you will probably also qualify for SNAP food assistance, and there may be other programs depending on your state. The kids will qualify for something through Medicaid even if they still have Tricare.

Part of Medicaid is they will help you with transportation expenses for medical appointments for your special needs child.

If it is you and 3 kids I would seriously seriously look at getting an old, simple 4-door car. If you live with your parents I assume they would let you borrow their (presumably larger) car/cars if you really needed it. The money you are paying to the van could be good after bad, is what I mean.

I didn't see your state.

Do you want to live with your parents? What are you going to school for?

Many have been in your shoes. You can do it!

ejk

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Re: Husband left, single mom, student, no job, bad health...
« Reply #5 on: September 13, 2013, 01:16:48 PM »
On the topic of health insurance - try finding the website of your state insurance commissioner. In WA state, we have a very helpful website from the commissioner, and you can call a toll-free number to get advice from them too! http://www.insurance.wa.gov/

MissStache

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Re: Husband left, single mom, student, no job, bad health...
« Reply #6 on: September 13, 2013, 01:19:04 PM »
Where are you getting your treatment?  If it is at a hospital, make an appointment with their financial people.  They know the ins and outs of applying for coverage and could be a great resource for what you need to do.  They will want you to have coverage so that they can be paid as well.


micah_mae_

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Re: Husband left, single mom, student, no job, bad health...
« Reply #7 on: September 13, 2013, 01:31:14 PM »
Can your parents provide child care? Some/most of the time, they travel fairly often but I also have my in laws who have offered to help.

How long will you be able to stay with your parents, anyway? Until I finish school or we kill each other. My kids are all boys, the insanity of having so many little boys around may drive us all insane.


Nope. You need a vehicle, but not necessarily "the van." Being upside down on it implies that it's probably relatively new; you need something cheaper (which probably correlates to older and smaller). Well it's a 2005, the bumper is falling off and the inside floor is pretty bad. It's not worth a whole lot. We owe about $8k and it's worth about half that.

Can you skip paying off the van, let your ex keep it (and the associated debt) and just buy a cheap car to get around instead? Certainly an option, although I'm not sure if he would be game..he has a truck. Right now he's being civil and giving me everything I want (basically, sole custody of the kids) so I don't want it to become ugly. I will certainly look into the possibility though...

I'm sure there's some state agency and/or non-profit organization that can help you figure out how that all works. Maybe try calling the department of family and children services, the department of labor, or one of your local politicians' offices for leads?
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Thanks I will get on the phone asap!

micah_mae_

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Re: Husband left, single mom, student, no job, bad health...
« Reply #8 on: September 13, 2013, 01:32:50 PM »

I didn't see your state.

Do you want to live with your parents? What are you going to school for?

Many have been in your shoes. You can do it!

I'm in TX, I don't mind living with them and accounting. :) Thank you!

micah_mae_

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Re: Husband left, single mom, student, no job, bad health...
« Reply #9 on: September 13, 2013, 01:33:23 PM »
Where are you getting your treatment?  If it is at a hospital, make an appointment with their financial people.  They know the ins and outs of applying for coverage and could be a great resource for what you need to do.  They will want you to have coverage so that they can be paid as well.

The military hospital here, unfortunately.