I just found out something from my mom last night that has left me completely disappointed, frustrated and super stressed. She told me that my dad, to whom she is married, has surprised her with a $50k worth of CC debt! To give you a little history on my parents... they have never been super savers, but never really made that much money either. I have always vowed to be more financially responsible than they are so that I would never have issue of financial stress. I would say my mom can be a saver and my dad likes to think he is a saver, but NOT!
I thought that now that they have gotten older and have paid off their house, they can start winding down and relaxing. They live in So Cal, so they can sell their house for a decent amount and retire to cheaper place (where we are) and be set. Well, they always plenty of excuses about how they won't have anything to do, they can't sell their house, it's too hot where we are, etc. My mom has started to come around and I thought that I can finally convince them and now THIS! I don't even know where to start with them. Money has always been something not discussed in our family. When trying to talk to them about finances since they are getting older, I have always been met with, "don't worry, we are fine" or "the government will take care of us". My dad is also the KING of denial. If it's not something he wants to hear, it will be in one ear and out the other.
ETA: for some reason, I feel so ashamed about this that it is even hard for me to discuss it with my DH (although I did tell him about it). His parents are totally together financially, so he does not understand and I don't want him to view my parents in a bad way.
I guess what I want to know is how can I bring this up with them and get them to understand (especially my dad). I can think of a few places they can cut from their budget (cable, meals out with family/extended family, selling one or two of their cars). Also, they are supporting my older brother who has mental health issues and likes to spend money. They pay for his cell phone, has kept his car, takes him out to eat, and buys ridiculous electronics for him. When I bring these things up, I am sure it will be tons of excuses of why they can not cut such and such (or in case of my brother, they would have to indulge him because he is "sick"). Also, what services are available out there to help deal with debt? Working harder and longer to pay for it is not an option because my dad is probably near the brink of having a heart attack soon. They do have a couple of properties in another country they can sell. My dad probably has enough in 401k to just cover the debt and nothing else for retirement. My husband and I do well, but we will not help them pay for this debt (nor do they expect us to) since they have gotten into this mess and will need to get out of it themselves. However, they are my mom and dad and I can't not help them out in some way, even if just with advice or guidance. If anyone has dealt with something similar, your advice is appreciated.