I'll keep this as short as possible.
My 63 y/o mom is:
1) needing to file bankruptcy
2) on the road to divorce (husband says he wants one)
3) a hoarder and enabler (her home is overrun with clothes/garbage/etc and is borderline uninhabitable)
4) broke! doesn't have a penny to her name
5) scared to death of being on her own...she's never had to do that before as an adult.
What in the world am I suppose to do? What do others do in my position? I have one brother that can help some but he's limited in how he can help (doesn't drive, doesn't make much $, but he gets by)
Options I don't think are even on the table...
A) Mom living with us. Our house is not very big, and having Mom here would drive my wife insane and cause marital problems. A non-starter.
B) Mom living in Section 8 housing (or the equivalent). I've seen those hellholes. My wife works in property management and admits they are hellholes.
C) Mom staying in her home. Well, in theory she COULD stay there for a bit longer, until foreclosure starts, but as stated above, the house is barely inhabitable and there are a lot of negative feelings attached.
The plan, right now, is to get mom set up in an apartment by the end of THIS month, so she can sign a lease before her credit is trashed! (It's not bad now, but with her husband leaving, they are both giving up on paying bills. They were just barely keeping their heads above water beforehand, and were going to need to file BK even if they stayed married). I figure if we don't get her in an apartment very soon, an active BK might make it harder for her to find something. And frankly she's stayed here for going on 3 weeks now, and that can't last much longer. We can do it until the end of July but I think that's it.
In the best of all worlds, she'd find a lady of a similar age in a similar situation and they'd become roommates or something, but she has few friends so this might happen down the road, but I'm not sure it will happen any time soon. So basically I'm resigned to having to help her financially for a while. My wife agreed that we can help her pay off her car and help pay her first month's rent and deposit, but I went over a budget with Mom the other night and I just don't see how she can support herself. She's two years from being able to retire with a full pension from her gov't job, and then she'd also be Medicare eligible. She might take SS at age 65 just so she can retire in two years (or maybe draw from my dad's; they were divorced about 18 years ago but were married for about 25). But this would be her budget for the next two years:
Monthly Income:
$1400
Expenses:
Rent $600 (maximum)(I'm assuming this would include water/garbage)
Car $300 (we would pay these payments until Jan, 2018, when it would be paid off)
Groceries/household goods $220
Car Insurance: $100
Medical: $100 (just for co-pays and meds, nothing extra)
Electricity: $80
Cable $80 (I know! she "needs" her shows)
Phone: $80 (I know! she just signed a new contract)
Entertainment $100
Gas $80
Savings: $100 (I'd like her to be able to save at least $100 per month to start building an EF)
TOTAL $1,840
So even with us paying the $300 car payment, she's still $140 in the red each month. I guess if you erase "savings," she's down to $40 in the red each month, but then she doesn't save a penny at all, and so any little emergency or unanticipated event destroys her budget (and probably results in her calling me!) I assume there will be some maintenance payments down the road, but that won't happen right this second. And I know those should be viewed as "extra," not essentials that are needed to balance a monthly budget.
What would you do if you were me?
*EDITED TO ADD: BK MUST HAPPEN. I didn't even include any debts in Mom's proposed budget. She owes (with her current husband) over $25,000 in credit cards and a staggering $90,000 in home equity loan on a home that's worth, maybe, $60,000-$70,000. At her age, and with her low income, there's no way to dig out of it. I don't say many things are impossible, but this is impossible. She will need to file BK to wipe her slate clean and let her limp into retirement with no debts.