Here is a link to a good self-assessment to help you evaluate dependency.
http://www.ncadd.org/index.php/learn-about-alcohol/alcohol-abuse-self-testI grew up with alcoholics, and I'd say that 3-4 drinks per day was pretty much the baseline for them. Weeknights were typically "under control" with heavier amounts on the weekends. Then during social events, out with friends, at picnics, at sporting events... the numbers would go way up.
Then as the disease progresses, add in some late night drinking...
Then a six pack after work some nights... just to take the edge off...
Then you can't really relax without a drink in your hand...
Then your social life starts to revolve around other heavy drinkers... because having fun without a drink isn't really possible...
Alcoholism is progressive - so a "rising" number of drinks per day to get the same effect could be a problem.
Alcoholism has a genetic component as well, so you might look to your family tree for clues.
I think it's awesome that you're asking the question. Better safe that sorry!
I agree that the "month off" plan sounds like a good first step. If it's no big deal - no harm no foul. If you find yourself antsy and hatching secret plans to find some wine when no one is looking - you've got some dependency issues.
Good luck!