Author Topic: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?  (Read 7665 times)

mustachepungoeshere

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How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« on: September 27, 2015, 07:49:57 PM »
My birthday is coming up and, as I mentioned in another thread, on the weekend my husband bought a couple of small stationery items that I had requested.

The subject of birthdays came up as he was paying, and the sales girl said she had been on the Tiffany website dropping hints for her upcoming birthday.

In the past I've felt like the odd one out for not having birthday expectations like that. (My husband would buy me anything I asked for, but I don't ask for and don't need much.) Then I found you lot. :)

So, what do you spend on your partner's birthday?

My husband tends to ask for items around $100 or more, e.g. a model car or an Xbox game.

HappierAtHome

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #1 on: September 27, 2015, 09:06:25 PM »
Depends - we vary wildly year-to-year. Last year I hadn't given him more than a token gift for a few years, and we were saving about 75-85%, so I splashed out on a Nintendo Wii U ($450ish?) which has been a lot of fun. This year, we're experiencing a lot of big expenses all at once in the vicinity of our birthdays, so he'll bake me a cake and we'll get nice takeaway on my birthday, and on his we'll go out to dinner and that'll be plenty.

rockstache

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #2 on: September 27, 2015, 09:29:11 PM »
It depends for us too. This year I really didn't want a single thing so he spent $0. I usually get him a new clothing item that he needs and a small item or two that he wants, probably in the $50-75 range at most.

JLR

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #3 on: September 27, 2015, 09:37:34 PM »
It depends. Sometimes we use it to get something big we've been after for a while. Sometimes there is nothing we want, so we get nothing.
This year my husband got a Sonos for his birthday. I got a cardigan for mine. We were both happy.

Lady Fordragon

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #4 on: September 28, 2015, 08:35:20 AM »
For the last 3-5 years, my husband and I haven't really exchanged gifts for any occasion.  We've gotten to the point that if we really want something than we use our fun money to buy it.  I do; however, cook my husband's favorite dish on his birthday and every so often I'll buy him a six pack of one of his favorite craft beer. 

yyc-phil

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #5 on: September 28, 2015, 08:38:19 AM »
My wife and I do not exchange gifts for birthdays, Christmas and our anniversary. Our way of celebrating special occasions is to get a nice dinner together in a restaurant we have not tried yet.

okits

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #6 on: September 28, 2015, 09:22:08 AM »
There's usually special food (depends on what we want and can swing with a tantrum-y toddler.) Sometimes nice meal out ($150 max), sometimes takeout with friends, occasionally cook-in.

Cake, homemade ($7) or bought ($20?)

Last birthday I specified no gift. DH felt that violates some kind of mental image he has of himself as a husband and got me roses (from the lousy local florist I detest, whose roses never bloom.  At least they didn't wilt for nearly a week.)  For his birthday I got him a big photo mug filled with chocolates ($15?) and a bottle of scotch ($55).

Gifts are a little superfluous at this point. Anything we need or want (that is decent value) we just buy. DH is not very materialistic and I desire FI over most luxury items I could own.

(Note: all figures Canadian dollars. We get taxed to hell and our currency's purchasing power is shit.)

marcela

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #7 on: September 28, 2015, 09:22:43 AM »
I'd say we're probably in the $50-$75 range for birthdays. This year I bought him a video game and an electric razor, one fun gift and one more practical. It came out to around $60. He tends to buy me books for my birthday and I imagine he spends a similar amount (~10-12 books used).
We used to get more spendy, but we're really bickling down to save up for a house and a big trip next year which will take up both birthday purchases (the olympics in Rio!)

Cookie78

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #8 on: September 28, 2015, 09:27:57 AM »
We do special things for each other for birthdays, or just say happy birthday, or celebrate with dinner. There may have been a few inexpensive gifts in the past that I can't remember.

Most times we do the same for Christmas, or just small inexpensive gifts (<$40). The best Christmas gift we gave each other was last year with a 6 day road trip around north Baja. Hoping to do south Baja for a future Christmas.

Time spent together is worth far more to me than things. Little thoughtful/useful things can be fun too.

FLBiker

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #9 on: September 28, 2015, 09:55:35 AM »
I'd say $50- $100, my wife probably spends more on me than I on her (which is the inverse of our gift reception preferences, interestingly enough).

We recently had a baby, though, so I suspect we'll stop getting each other stuff.  For example, I just found these: http://loogguitars.com/

I reckon my 5 month old is too young, though. :)

Sailor Sam

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #10 on: September 28, 2015, 10:17:48 AM »
Based on my presents, I estimate that my wife probably spent ~$150 for my birthday this year. Previous years were about the same. Her birthday is in Oct, and I will be spending $400 on a GoPro camera she has requested.

One of the things I've found fun about boosting my savings rate, is re-finding the anticipation and joy I used to feel around my birthday. Prior to MMM style savings, I could afford to buy myself whatever toy I desired. Gifts were unnecessary and I found them annoying because they were often things I didn't want. Under the MMM savings regime, toys go onto a deferred purchase list. I send the list out before my birthday, and folks use it to purchase things I actually want. I've found the deferment of pleasure really jacks up the anticipation of the gifts, and has brought back the gift receiving joy I used to feel as a kid.

My wife isn't an MMM aficionado, but she naturally postpones most purchases. I love seeing her face light up when I gift her with something she wants, but would never buy for herself. Those are the years I really nail it, and it's incredibly joyful for both of us.

AZDude

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #11 on: September 28, 2015, 10:28:44 AM »
Probaly ~$50 on a gift and a nice dinner out. For me, I never cared. I just people all I want is good food(however it is made) and a low-stress day. I never ask for anything for bday, christmas, etc... drives my wife nuts, but I tell her I never want anyone to feel obligated to get me a gift. Just showing up and saying happy birthday is good enough.

DogChaseLane

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #12 on: September 28, 2015, 10:51:29 AM »
We don't do gifts at all unless there is something small that we sincerely want or need.  No gift just to give a gift.  It was just my husband's birthday, and I took him out to his favorite brew pub for macaroni and cheese.  He was thrilled.

Mntngoat

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #13 on: September 28, 2015, 10:55:23 AM »
My wife and I do not exchange gifts for birthdays, Christmas and our anniversary. Our way of celebrating special occasions is to get a nice dinner together in a restaurant we have not tried yet.

We do the same.  She  doesn't always like this but idea, but it works for us.

ML

2Birds1Stone

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #14 on: September 28, 2015, 11:16:40 AM »
I think the average Bday gift for SO was a nice dinner out with drinks. Maybe a $50-100 gift.

I asked for nothing this past year, and she felt bad but obliged. I really don't need "things" and I think it's the thought that counts anyway.

purple monkey

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #15 on: September 28, 2015, 11:40:53 AM »
I usually spend about $50 and help my child with their gift of around $25.

Apples

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #16 on: September 28, 2015, 02:28:18 PM »
We've been married for 1 year, no kids, and still in the "getting ourselves adult things" phase.  We spend $100-$200 on each other for a birthday.  For him, I give him gift cards towards beer brewing equipment; this year I will give him money towards a GPS collar for our dog.  (side note:  the dog is a hunting dog, a breed known for running, and we like to take him on leash-less walks.  so we're splurging on this collar.)  My birthday idk what I want, but I know for Christmas we, together, will be asking for house items.  We also usually get each other one piece of nice clothing.  We generally use these occasions to get one nice item or money towards one.  And we also go out to dinner or to an event of some sort.  Though that money actually comes out of our "date night" line item in the budget.

1967mama

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #17 on: September 28, 2015, 02:30:17 PM »
Usually we give each other gift cards to places we would have had to spend money at anyways, like Home Depot. This way, the kids will still feel like we are giving dad a gift, but he and I know that it is money we would have spent sooner or later.

dcozad999

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #18 on: September 28, 2015, 02:33:19 PM »
It all depends for us, but we usually keep it small.

I did spring for a non-mustachian Herman Miller office chair for her graduation though.

Easye418

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #19 on: September 28, 2015, 02:55:42 PM »
Usually, $200.

Lately, a nice dinner.

That's for her.  For me, nothing.  Everything I want/need I already have or buy for myself.

I would really love a nice pair of Allen Edmonds, but can't stomach the price.  I am going to look into used ones on eBay tho.

Valetta

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #20 on: September 28, 2015, 03:20:34 PM »
Varies a lot. We do typically go out for dinner, it could be somewhere expensive or it could be a cheap meal at a great ethnic place, just whatever we are in the mood for.

We've had a rule about gifts since before we were married - only buy something for the other if it is an awesomely thoughtful idea, don't just buy something to buy something. And we both fully recognize that it would be unrealistic to have a brilliant idea for every gift giving occasion. So sometimes we get each other presents and sometimes we don't. This applies to every holiday and special day.

We also occasionally get each other small gifts on non-special days, just as we think of things. We both agree that is more meaningful than buying big, expensive present just because it's December 25.

horsepoor

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #21 on: September 28, 2015, 03:30:32 PM »
We don't do gifts at all unless there is something small that we sincerely want or need.  No gift just to give a gift.  It was just my husband's birthday, and I took him out to his favorite brew pub for macaroni and cheese.  He was thrilled.

Pretty much this.  We each choose which fancy restaurant to go to for our birthdays.  Gifts only if they make sense and are useful.  No gift and just the dinner is fine too.  My husband's birthday is a couple weeks before Christmas, and he has been driving around for over a year with a cracked windshield, so I will probably get him a gift certificate to the glass place to encourage him to get it fixed.  Sometimes we decide to forego bday/xmas gifts to pool the money for something larger - for instance a few years ago we bought a $700 Weber grill.  When we bought each other gifts more regularly, they were usually around the $200 mark, so nice, but not extravagant.

mustachepungoeshere

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #22 on: September 28, 2015, 04:39:30 PM »
One of the things I've found fun about boosting my savings rate, is re-finding the anticipation and joy I used to feel around my birthday. Prior to MMM style savings, I could afford to buy myself whatever toy I desired. Gifts were unnecessary and I found them annoying because they were often things I didn't want. Under the MMM savings regime, toys go onto a deferred purchase list. I send the list out before my birthday, and folks use it to purchase things I actually want. I've found the deferment of pleasure really jacks up the anticipation of the gifts, and has brought back the gift receiving joy I used to feel as a kid.

I like this.

I think I'm finding something similar. There is a board game I have wanted for months but I just left it on my eBay watch list until my birthday rolled around. The anticipation certainly enhances the experience.

La Bibliotecaria Feroz

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #23 on: September 28, 2015, 05:28:48 PM »
Sometimes nothing. sometimes more. I was not expecting anything for my birthday this year, but Mr. FP surprised me with tickets to Arlo Guthrie's Alice's Restaurant 50th anniversary tour, which was suuuuuper cool.

I made him a cake. I was gonna make it from scratch, but he specifically requested a box.

We might have gone out to dinner, but we had gone out to a concert a week or two earlier, so we didn't want to pay for more babysitting.

I never buy any presents for Mr. FP. If he doesn't want something enough that he has already bought it for himself, then he doesn't really want it.

candygirl

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #24 on: September 28, 2015, 08:03:23 PM »
We don't do gifts for holidays or birthdays, but random treats may show up for each other on occasion. Cookies or brownies from Snobbucks create a lot of excitement for Candyman. Or a 5 guys burger (work treats from my work).

mustachepungoeshere

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #25 on: September 28, 2015, 08:24:30 PM »
Sometimes nothing. sometimes more. I was not expecting anything for my birthday this year, but Mr. FP surprised me with tickets to Arlo Guthrie's Alice's Restaurant 50th anniversary tour, which was suuuuuper cool.

You can get anything you want ... for your birthday. :)

ShoulderThingThatGoesUp

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #26 on: September 29, 2015, 06:11:21 AM »
$0. We don't tie getting small things we want or getting each other small things we want them to have to specific days of the year.

MEER

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #27 on: September 29, 2015, 09:48:05 PM »
$0 and haven't spent any for several years. I always bake something for him, and recently he makes enormous cards for me. I did surprise him with a trip to Portugal for his 50th, though. No Christmas or anniversary gifts, either.

ambimammular

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #28 on: September 30, 2015, 06:26:42 AM »
We don't get each other b-day presents, but the birthday person gets their favorite dinner, and a homemade cake. DH always goes angel food cake with pistachio frosting. (Meh from me.) And I pick chocolate (a meh for him).
Eating the dinner out is a possibility.

If we do any shopping that we had planned on anyway, (say work shoes) we always claim it as the birthday present. "Look, Honey, birthday shoes! I'll get you two!" And the recipient reacts like they've gotten a puppy. We still think we're funny.

boarder42

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #29 on: September 30, 2015, 06:34:34 AM »
depends the 2 years previous we've gone to chicago for the cubs cards series so probably 200 each of those years b/c i have massive amounts of free travel points.  but this year we didnt do anything.  We dont spend money on typical "gifts" we have or buy what we need ... we spend money on experiences.

Kaplin261

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #30 on: September 30, 2015, 06:44:39 AM »
Not much at all. However for our only child we spend $500-$800 for a Birthday party. Custom cake,bounce house, DJ,BBQ Catered and a bunch of booze for the adults. He is 2 and we dont buy him toys and we encourage our guests not to bring a gift. It's the only party we have each each year.

justajane

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #31 on: September 30, 2015, 06:44:57 AM »
We usually go out to dinner, and if someone wants something for their birthday, they usually buy it themselves.

We also only do stockings for each other with practical things at Christmas and nothing for Valentine's Day or anniversaries. We go out to dinner if we feel like it.

We've been married 10 years and it works for us. Exchanging gifts and managing expectations is stressful. I think it has been good for our marriage to take it out of the equation altogether. Once in a blue moon, I'll buy him something, but it's not usually for a holiday. 

Retire-Canada

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #32 on: September 30, 2015, 07:16:12 AM »
A few presents and a fancy dinner got us up to ~$400 for GF's birthday recently.

I want an ultralight sleeping bag for my camping adventures and I don't are about fancy dinners so I'll suggest we grab a $25 curry and spend the rest on that when my birthday comes up.

pbkmaine

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #33 on: September 30, 2015, 07:31:48 AM »
Whatever he wants. He's a good guy, and aside from Christmas and his birthday, does not ask for much.

mustachepungoeshere

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Re: How much do you spend on birthdays for your SO?
« Reply #34 on: September 30, 2015, 09:43:50 PM »
If we do any shopping that we had planned on anyway, (say work shoes) we always claim it as the birthday present. "Look, Honey, birthday shoes! I'll get you two!" And the recipient reacts like they've gotten a puppy. We still think we're funny.

I also think you're funny. :)