A while ago, I received some great advice for helping my nephew.
http://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/ask-a-mustachian/advice-needed-my-opportunity-to-change-a-young-life/He's on a great path now. He found retail and it's been a great fit, as long as he's selling a product that he's proud of. And he's enrolled in college, took two classes last semester and enjoyed them. So great success there!
Now I need similar advice for another person, but the consequences of this may be much more significant. This person (call him Charles) is a neighbor's child. Some of you might remember that I live in a mixed income community with $1M houses and public housing located on the same blocks. Charles is from one of the public housing units and hasn't had much success in his life. I met him when he was 14 or 15. Friendly kid. Walks around the neighborhood all the time and knows and greets every person, every time he sees them. Not much deeper than that, just friendly. I suspect that a part of the shallow level of interaction is because the white, upper class people have never really learned how to interact. We're learning, but it's not a fast or easy process. And the other part is just his personality - more acquaintances than deep friendships, which I get.
Charles has some pretty severe ADHD, and I'm not sure what other learning difficulties, but in the 5 years I've known him, he has only advanced one grade level and has now aged-out of school. Last year, Charles got in some pretty serious trouble (first time) a week after his 18th birthday, and went to prison for 6 months. Now he's back and he's struggling. Still has a good, friendly attitude. He got a job at a fast-food restaurant through his halfway house. The commute will be about 70-80 minutes most days (one way), but he doesn't mind that because he says the more time he spends doing something, the less time there is for trouble.
I should add that having known this guy for 5 years, I really do believe that he's weak in intelligence and in conviction. Meaning that he's a follower. If he's around the wrong types of people, he'll end up going that way. If he's around the right types, he can find a better path.
Having just been through a similar exercise with my own uber-privileged nephew, I see the differences and recognize that if Charles had extended family, a school system, higher expectations, role models, a secure home, safe social environment, or even just some of these, then he'd have a better chance of success. Right now, I really want to help him find something that will give him a chance at a career and hope for his own future. I don't even know where to start. I started seeing some listings for building and groundskeepers where I work and thought that would be great for him -- structure and always working with other people, but kind of easy and laid back. No real accountability other than to show up every day and do the work assigned. But then the Govt hiring freeze limited those jobs to current fed employees, so that's out for now. (Not even sure he'd be eligible due to his record). He is open to the help and agrees he needs a career -- not a fast food job. It's hard to figure out if he's capable of a vocation like plumbing, but I would be willing to buy him an apprenticeship if that sort of thing even exists. But I think we would need a vocation that really doesn't take much learning or knowledge. I'm just having trouble thinking of what those might be in this area (and yes, he has to stay in the Wash DC area)
Any thoughts on what I should look for?
Here's a recap of some of his traits:
- Decent human being
- Agreeable and quick to smile
- Easily swayed by others (for good or for bad)
- Convicted felon
- Extremely short attention span
- He's a little bit scary looking until you get to know him
- He's not terribly bright and doesn't always realize the impact his actions will have on others
There are a gazillion service-related jobs that exist or could be created where I live. There are so many people with too much money and not enough time. People will pay $17 for a half-hour dog walk. We cannot even get handymen because there are too many people competing for their time to do minor things. This area is ripe for an enterprising young person, but unfortunately, because of his record I don't think he could ever be given a key to anyone's house. He's a little too slow-paced to compete for house-painting or construction laborer jobs around here, which is why I thought he'd be well suited for government facilities work.
I'm worried that if it's not a very structured program, he'll just lose interest and stop showing up. I also feel that Charles has an opportunity far greater than most in his circumstances. A number of other people in the neighborhood would also be very interesting in helping Charles.
Any ideas?