ETA: I didn't realize that this post was so long until after it posted. Here is the executive summery: How can I resolve my Mustacian interest in paying off our SLs with my emotional desire to own a home in my expensive hometown or other towns with great school districts?
My non-mustacian emotions are taking over a big financial decisions and I want to figure out the right path. They're at odds with logic. I'm not one to covet stuff, but there's one thing I'm envious of, and that's home ownership.
Although most of our rentals have worked out just fine, I want to buy a home because I feel like it will help me feel more permanently rooted, and I can invest time and energy into making a house our home -- I want to paint walls and hang artwork and have furniture that "works" for us in the long run, not just something that works for us for now.
Another important factor is that our son will be going to kindergarten next year and would like to start him in the same school district that he'll live in until he moves out. We know that circumstances may change at some point, but the ideal is to have 1 school district for him -- with the possibility that we may move once or twice for some reason. But my husband moved around a lot growing up and doesn't want that for our kids.
I also want to move back to my hometown, where my parents currently live. I have lived in many places over the last 20 years, and consistently have never felt better about where I live than in my hometown. It's an expensive area, however, and not the most convenient location to commute into the major city nearby. But I want to hang a shingle and practice estate planning law there. It doesn't have more than 2 law offices, and because the residents are fairly wealthy I think it could sustain another. The other benefits are that my parents live there and they are more than happy to help with after-school care for our sons; I am still involved with the church there and have never found a church more suited to me than this one; and it has top-notch public schools for my sons without the super-competitive atmosphere found at nearby schools.
These are all non-financial reasons, because it seems like the financial logic weighs in favor of either renting or buying in a lower-priced town.
We currently pay $1825 for our apartment, which suits our needs but we aren't thrilled about sending our son to kindergarten in this town and we will likely outgrow the apartment quickly after our second son arrives. As much as we're trying to accommodate the 4 of us in this space, I don't think we can make it work long-term. My husband recently got a better-paying job, so we could afford the increased out of pocket expenses of either a rental or mortgage in a town with better schools.
Single family homes in my hometown rent for $2500-$3500, whereas buying a house would cost us about $2600 PITI. But to put down a down payment, we would need to withdraw from our Roth IRAs. My family is willing to pitch in some of the DP because they know we can't afford it otherwise. (The houses we're considering are entry-level homes in good neighborhoods with possibilities for additions in the future -- which we would pay for with cash)
Otherwise, there is a town that has a great public school system, an easier commute into the city, and a church of the same religion as mine (although I've never visited so I don't know if it would still be such an awesome fit) -- and we could buy the same house, on less land, for $50k - $100k less. The downside is that it's still 20 minutes away from my parents. So, no after-school care help. But I'm confident that we would see my parents often because we see them weekly now and we live 20 minutes away now. My parents would be a LOT less willing to help with a DP in this town, obviously, because they really want us to live in their town.
Single Family rentals in the other town are also less expensive than my hometown's rentals (the max I saw was $2800), although right now I didn't find anything that we would want to rent for the long term.
My parents are in their 70's and in completely denial that they will ever move out of their current home, but I'm sure it will happen in the next 10 years. They don't have a plan for where they'll go, but they want to be close to their friends -- who all live in their town.
Oh, and we have $185k in SL debt. Did I mention that? We really have no business buying a house. But when the rentals in the towns with great school districts go for as much as we would pay for a mortgage, and I have such a strong emotional interest in putting down roots, I think home ownership is the better option. I just want to do it in a somewhat financially responsible way.
Is a face punch in order? Or can we do this (set down roots in a great school district in a great community) in a financially responsible way?