How about hiring an RV ?
Yup, that one's crossed our minds. DH sold his when his mom and her pal Al Z. Heimer moved in with us. We miss it, but we didn't want it to sit unused in the driveway, mocking us.
If you are road-tripping to Aspen anyway, I think you need to give up on the idea of being within walking distance of your daughter and her family. If you are willing to drive in for the day you will do much better. Try Carbondale, Basalt or Snowmass. I know it's not ideal, but usually the world isn't.
This is the longest vacation DH and I have ever taken in the history of us. I am going to do whatever I can to make it as close to ideal as possible, which is why I turned to this awesome community for help. It is far too early in the game to give up. Our proposed itinerary follows. Estimated mileage, without side trips, and elapsed time, sans traffic delays, in parenthesis.
(tl;dr - don't read between the lines)
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The 2016 Great Family Oldest-to-Youngest Road Trip:
Day 1-3 Bay Area to Long Beach. Two days on the Queen Mary with my closest family. We decided at my Dad's Memorial Service in April to celebrate my Aunt's 86th birthday. We didn't want to wait until her funeral to see each other again. Always up for a party, she chose the locale and is generously hosting. OOP: Gas, parking, incidentals. (390 miles, 5'40")
Day 4-5 Long Beach to Palm Desert, CA. Two days in the desert, in August, spiffing up our newest rental before the new tenants move in. OOP: Gas, food (132 miles, 2'15")
Day 5 Palm Desert, CA to St George UT. Using IHG Points. OOP: Gas, Food (602 miles, 5'54")
Day 6 St. George, UT to Aspen, CO. OOP: Gas, Food (816 miles, 7'21")
Daya 6.5- 9 Aspen, CO. Will spring for groceries and may fulfill a Costco wish list on the way in. OOP: ??? (Please Dog, no driving!)
Day 10 Aspen , CO to Salt Lake City, UT. More IHG Points. OOP: More Gas, Food (656 miles, 6'20")
Day 11 SLC to Bay Area. OOP: Last Gas, Food (716 miles, 10'21")
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Note: If you're a good math-er, that's 3,312 miles and 38 hours of driving, not including traffic, fill-ups and pit stops. Estimated gas cost: $450.
More Notes: We will need a variety of clothing for this trip, from work clothes to dress-up. We are packing only what we already own. Further, we travel with a cooler and make meals along the way. All hotel nights booked so far include breakfast. My Aunt's special gifts cost under $10. (Shhh, don't tell, they're awesome!) Baby gifts were given at baby shower, so that's covered too.
No fucking way are we going to stay any further than walking distance from our new grandbaby. Those three days are our only respite from mucho driving. We are FI and could afford to stay anywhere we want. We would rather not be sheep. We're trying to figure out something that won't cost more than the refrigerator we are installing in the new rental property ($1.1k, ouch!). The mustachian way is to get the best value for each green soldier eliminated. You guys have offered up a ton of awesome suggestions and I'm confident that something will turn up as a result.
Just for a fun example, for those mustachians following along, I priced out The Little Nell (closest to their house) this morning. The Room Availability Chart shows the price (four night minimum) before tax of $8,045.00. And no, that is not a typo. With tax, the tab would be nearly NINE GRAND! Plus who knows what other fees await? (Parking? Tips? Resort Fees? IDK) BTW, as of tonight, one of out dates has sold out. WHO pays this kind of money? Crazy rich people, or people traveling on the company dime, that's who!!
Here's my hail mary pass- difficult campground?
Oh, kellyincville, your suggestions have been great, but I'm too damn old for that and I don't want to schlepp all that gear so far. While I won't spend NINE GRAND to avoid camping, my everything is crossed that it doesn't come to that. I thought I was being generous in budgeting $200/night, especially since we have over 700k IHG points! But the thought of spending anywhere close to $1k or more is killing me.
BTW - I had to google "difficult campground". Wonderful out-of-the-box thinking! I even thought about borrowing DSD's camping gear, but DH was less than enthusiastic. Since he'll be doing most of the driving, I need to pay attention to his comfort too. One wrinkle in all of this is that DH is not particularly mustachian. He wants for so very little that when faced with a big expense, he is far more likely than I to say "Fuck it, we can afford it."
P.S. I am really appreciative of all of your suggestions. Please don't think I'm taking potshots at your ideas, they are good ones. I had given this a lot of thought and effort before I sought help from this awesome community. I'm a firm believer in shaking the trees to make some fruit fall (aka making your own "luck"). One of your tips may yet prove to be the fruit I was seeking.
BTW - can you guess that after 3k posts, I finally figured out how to do multiple quotes? Fun!
Thanks again, you awesome mustachian people! Mwah!