Author Topic: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.  (Read 16760 times)

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Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« on: April 06, 2015, 07:45:18 AM »
So 20 years ago when we got married, we didn't have the time or cash for a honeymoon.  And this has been a sore point for DH for all that time.  I guess it's time to bite the bullet and go on one.  Problem is, I don't know where to start.  All-inclusives are so much money.  And when I read online reviews, I only end up more confused.  One guy likes it and the next says it was horrible.  Everything includes one thing and excludes something else.  How do I know that I'm getting this magical experience?  If it's not good enough, am I going to hear about the honeymoon until 2035?

He wants to lie on the beach with a drink.  Sounds easy, right?  Find a beach and buy him a drink... 

Parameters:

1. Beach
2. Not too much to do. (I want to go and see stuff on vacation and he feels that's not a vacation.)
3. We're bringing the kids.  I know that's not romatical, but they're almost grown, and I feel like it's getting close to our last chance to really spend time with them.  So we need 2 room for some space.  And we will be tied to Christmas/Spring/Summer breaks.
4. We don't have passports, but we could get some.
5. It has to be warm enough to swim in the ocean/sea.  San Diego in January was rejected because it would be too cold.
6. He wants to snorkel if possible.
7. I'm open to a condo, and having some easy breakfast/lunch options.  And eating out for dinner.  But if I look like I'm trying to keep costs down, it's going to stress him out and backfire.  He's actually pretty naturally frugal, BUT he hates being "told" to do something cheaper.  If it seems like a mandate, or if I look like I'm counting pennies or budgeting, it's going to trigger a rebellion.

I feel so overwhelmed.  I wish he was planning this, not me.  It would be so spendy, but it would be out of my hands.

Some ideas:

1. Mexican all-inclusive resorts.  $8-10K for our family of 5, ouch!
2. Florida, Gulf Coast beaches. Spring break or later, to make it warm enough.
3. Carolinas, or Eastern Seaboard, for summer.

All suggestions appreciated!!!

webguy

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #1 on: April 06, 2015, 08:02:02 AM »
You should take a look at Cozumel - an island off the east coast of Mexico. I'm currently on vacation in Playa Del Carmen for 3 months and we went across there for a day trip, rented a jeep and drove around it stopping at beaches and to snorkel. Some of the beaches on the south and east side of the island are amazing and very quiet, plus they have great snorkeling on the south and west sides. They also have some Mayan ruins in the island to explore too, and the main town/port area on the west side has lots of great restaurants and bars. Just a thought.

matchewed

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #2 on: April 06, 2015, 08:05:37 AM »
How about have your husband set up the framework and you knock out the details. That way he gets the vacation he wants and you get to make it cost effective. He picks the location and you figure out the how.

Having a beach and drink in hand doesn't have to be some all inclusive paid vacation. There is a huge middle ground here.

TN_Steve

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #3 on: April 06, 2015, 08:12:30 AM »
You should take a look at Cozumel - an island off the east coast of Mexico. I'm currently on vacation in Playa Del Carmen for 3 months and we went across there for a day trip, rented a jeep and drove around it stopping at beaches and to snorkel. Some of the beaches on the south and east side of the island are amazing and very quiet, plus they have great snorkeling on the south and west sides. They also have some Mayan ruins in the island to explore too, and the main town/port area on the west side has lots of great restaurants and bars. Just a thought.

And, like southern florida, summer vacation is the off season.  (hotter than Hades and hurricane risks, but for us it is worth if for less $$ and far fewer crowds). 

Note also on COZ that you have option of either flying directly onto the Island, or flying to Cancun, dodging the timeshare hawkers, catching the regularly scheduled bus to Playa, and doing the short walk to the Ferry terminal.  That option adds about 2 hours, and costs (if I remember) only about $25 each for the bus & ferry.

DragonSlayer

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #4 on: April 06, 2015, 08:28:59 AM »
Have you considered a cruise? You can find some good deals, esp. If you're willing to go in the summer/fall when the hurricane risks are higher. What we enjoy about them is that you can do as much or as little as you like. If you want to do stuff, there's plenty to do and if not, you can sack out in a deck chair. And you should have no trouble finding snorkeling in a port. Food's and most other things are included, so that takes some of the penny counting out, once you've paid.

We've done cruises for not much more than we could have done a week in a hotel or condo, and we've gotten to go more places and do more things without the worry of cooking, etc. on vacation.

Bob W

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #5 on: April 06, 2015, 08:31:35 AM »
http://www.richmondsavers.com/the-holy-grail-how-to-book-an-all-inclusive-resort-with-points/

So goto this site.   You can have an all inclusive Cancun vacation simply by playing the mileage card game.  Send Alexi an email at the site to sign up for his course.

Tell em Bob W from MMM sent ya!

hdatontodo

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #6 on: April 06, 2015, 08:33:58 AM »
How about snorkeling at Black Rock in Maui but staying at a less costly place with a kitchen in Honokawai, a bit north.

kathrynd

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #7 on: April 06, 2015, 08:41:23 AM »
have you considered house sitting?
You look after pets, plants in exchange for accommodation.
You just need to be home every day to care for them too.

Do a google for sites.
Usually need to pay, when you are looking for a place.

We house sit while in Australia, for the past 5 years...we  love it.

HairyUpperLip

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #8 on: April 06, 2015, 08:42:04 AM »
Not sure on the price for a family, but my wife and I really enjoyed staying at the Marriot in San Juan, Puerto Rico. It's America, so you don't need a passport (money saved). It's America so my normal phone plan applied and I didn't pay any extras to use my phone like normal (money saved).

Our hotel had a beach view and there was a family that laid on the beach to tan (i guess?) everyday from 6am to 6pm. Looks disgustingly boring to me, but the beach is nice regardless and they clean it every morning.  (your husbands beach fantasy)

We were able to walk all the way to Old San Juan which was awesome. We so much local type of stuff along the way. You would pass it all in a flash with a car. We walked all the way to the tip of the island where there is an old fort called El Morro. There is a lot to see there itself and in the city of old san juan too (you get to see stuff).


For food, we pretty much ate most of our lunch meals at a spot local to the hotel. It was also our anniversary trip so we also did try a really expensive Asian fusion spot and that was terrible. The local spot was pretty cheap and we enjoyed it. (cheap food)

It's family friendly. I saw tons of families with kids of all ages.

Bacardi has a factory there that does free tours and that also includes tickets for 2 free drinks at the end. If you take a cab, they charge a flat rate of like $40. So maybe Uber is there now and could save some loot? Or renting a car for that day might be cheaper. (free stuff to do)

I dunno about the snorkeling stuff.

Either way, I really enjoyed San Juan and would even go back to visit. We also spent money for a tour guide and checked out the rain forest, el yunca (sp?). It was a really good time and I enjoyed the ability to walk around.



MayDay

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #9 on: April 06, 2015, 08:46:21 AM »
We went to south florida (ft. Lauderdale area) over christmas. 

Temps to swim were a bit chilly, but fine once you were used to it.  So any other month would certainly be warm enough!

We rented a house walking distance from the beach through VRBO or airbnb (can't remember which).  It was very nice.  No snorkeling, though. 

Really, there are so many options, come up with 3-5 and present them to him, make him pick. 

Retire-Canada

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #10 on: April 06, 2015, 08:52:11 AM »
So 20 years ago when we got married, we didn't have the time or cash for a honeymoon.  And this has been a sore point for DH for all that time.  I guess it's time to bite the bullet and go on one.

All suggestions appreciated!!!

Or tell DH it was 20yrs ago and it's time to get over it. ;)

I'm not kidding. If you guys want a family holiday for sure figure something out, but if he's got a bee in his bonnet about the lack of a honeymoon 20yrs ago he needs some counseling.

-- Vik

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #11 on: April 06, 2015, 09:03:14 AM »
... I was expecting something different when I read the OP's thread title ;-)

First off, where are you located?  A large chunk of the expense may be getting there, and where I'd recommend may change.

My family did the Carolina outer banks and we loved it.  You can find nice 3-4 bedroom houses a block from the beach for under $800/week (with taxes) - especially if you can avoid peak season.  September and early October actually has the highest water temperature and no crowds.  We did our own "afternoon cocktails," mixing them up at the house and then either drinking them on the deck or taking them to the beach in a rolling cooler.
By renting a house you have a lot of space and can cook your own meals (at least breakfast and lunch) which saves a ton on the expenses.

If you're on the west-coast I'd consider Baja Mexico, particularly Baja Sur.  The water on the gulf-side is warm year-round, and the $USD is quite strong right now compared to the Peso, making things cheaper for you.

forummm

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #12 on: April 06, 2015, 09:08:54 AM »
The title sounds like an article in Cosmo, not MMM. :)


But I think Florida could be a good idea. There are lots of beaches and beach towns, and it's warm enough to swim even in winter. Check out the average weather. If you're far enough south, it'll be highs in the upper 70s, even in January. Lots of the beach towns have different culture depending on the time of year. If you go in the winter to Daytona Beach or places like that, it's not kids on spring break, so it's nice and quiet and not too many people around--some "snow birds". And it can be pretty affordable. You can find a hotel at the beach during off-peak times for $40/night. Or can stay further away if you like. Some of the nature destinations like the Everglades are great for a day of something different too.

MsSindy

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #13 on: April 06, 2015, 09:22:57 AM »
Not sure on the price for a family, but my wife and I really enjoyed staying at the Marriot in San Juan, Puerto Rico. It's America, so you don't need a passport (money saved). It's America so my normal phone plan applied and I didn't pay any extras to use my phone like normal (money saved).
.....

This was going to be my suggestion, except look on HomeAway and AirBnB to rent a condo/house instead - cheaper and you can cook your own meals.  Puerto Rico is our favorite place to go for all the things mentioned: US Currency, no passport, cheap flights, culture, snorkeling, "eye candy", etc.  Depending on where you are flying from, flights are pretty inexpensive - much cheaper than going to Cancun and no additional international taxes.

Stay in Condado, Carolina, or Isla Verde - that's where most of the action is and you can easily get to Old San Juan.

choppingwood

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #14 on: April 06, 2015, 09:35:31 AM »
Check out rentals on Kauai or Maui, using "beach" as one of your criteria. Kauai is quieter, Maui is busier. VRBO is a great place to start for finding a rental. You won't have any trouble booking during school breaks if you book in advance. Much cheaper than a hotel, with plenty of space for everyone. Choose a place that is in a town with decent restaurants. Get a place with a lanai and a BBQ.

I tend to eat breakfasts on the lanai. I often pack a lunch, because I'm out exploring all day. (Your DH needs to see some different beaches, because they are really fabulous.) But restaurant meals are often at lunch, because in order to enjoy an on oceanfront view in a restaurant, it needs to be during daylight!) I tend to eat dinner at the rental, because I am tuckered out.

You will all be happy.

Why is DH not planning this?


MandalayVA

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #15 on: April 06, 2015, 09:38:17 AM »
My family did the Carolina outer banks and we loved it.  You can find nice 3-4 bedroom houses a block from the beach for under $800/week (with taxes) - especially if you can avoid peak season.  September and early October actually has the highest water temperature and no crowds. 

I also need to add that in September and early October the Outer Banks like to capture hurricanes like bosses.  If you want a nice east coast beach with good resorts and weather consider St. Simons Island in Georgia.  It gets protected from hurricanes because it's inside the curve before Georgia turns into Florida.  Prices are fairly reasonable too.

teacherwithamustache

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #16 on: April 06, 2015, 09:48:51 AM »
West Coast of Mexico is Cheaper then the Caribbean in General.  Summer is also the offseason for West Coast of Mexico.  The Nationals go to West Coast Xmas-Easter.  It is too hot in the Summer for them.  I think the West Coast of Mexico is much Cooler in July then any Southern State with the cement and humidity but whatever...

I hate all inclusive s because you miss out on the culture of a town and area.  I like B&B's and then walk the beach for dinners and drinks.  I mean really your husband is not 20 Years Old anymore is he really going to be able to go on a drinking bender and drink more then $20 worth of alcohol in a day?  In Mexico paying gringo tourist prices on the beach you can drink 5-8 Dos Equis or 50 oz of frozen margaritas for $12.  Or you could pay $12 for a case or Corona and keep it in your room if he is that big of a lush =).

My Family and I go to Zihuatenajo Mexico every June/July for 10-14 days.  We stay at a crazy nice B&B in a suite 2 kids under 8 YO for about  $200 a night (includes bfast/beach access/ kids program). I go offshore fishing and catch Tuna/Sail fish/ Marlin for $200 a trip.  I barter the Tuna back to a restaurant and get basically 1 free family dinner for every 2 Tuna I catch.  Snorkeling will cost you $5 from the beach or $30 from a boat.   We eat crazy nice and outrageous for $75 a day.  My wife gives me 150 pesos a day for alcohol.  I walk up to local big grocery store.  Buy 2 cases of Pacifico or Corona and take them back to my room.  Then I drink those over the next 2 weeks and buy 3-5 frozen drinks a day on the beach.

Roundtrip flights $400 per person.

We live "high on the hog" for about $5,000 for 2 weeks.  PM me if you want more specific details.

little_owl

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #17 on: April 06, 2015, 10:00:56 AM »
You sound stressed and frustrated, and you have just begun planning!  I suggest using a travel advisor.  For "landmark" trips like this (making up for 20 years of resentment and the last trip with the kids) a good advisor is well worth it.  Typically, you pay a nominal fee and they get most of their income through the commissions on where they book you into.  The benefits (like upgrades, free breakfasts, etc.) often outweigh any direct costs...and you can outsource the planning which sounds like it is worth it.

We can all pepper you with advice and input, but this sounds like a case where a few extra upfront dollars can save stress, frustration and yes even money long term.  Good luck!

partgypsy

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #18 on: April 06, 2015, 10:05:20 AM »
I am going to follow this because I have almost the same situation, will be our 20th early 2016, we eloped the first time, but I am the "husband" (want a nice vacation). However he would be happy to sit around, while I would like some activities.
Our list so far is driving down to Disneyworld, renting a beach house on Carolina coast for a week (this can be reasonable especially on shoulder seasons), cruise (know the least about this option) and also a tulum area resort (seemed like some good deals here)

RunHappy

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #19 on: April 06, 2015, 10:11:01 AM »
I would say include your husband as much as possible since this is very important to him. Ask him if he wants the kids to come and where he wants to go.  If he is looking for a true honeymoon then kids might not be part of that fantasy. 

stringcheese

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #20 on: April 06, 2015, 11:06:57 AM »
we stayed at a lovely, large airbnb on kauai, did a costco run, and made all of our own meals. used miles for airfare. all in all, i think we paid 1200-1500 for the entire trip, food, lodging, car, and excursions included. and it is NEVER cold on kauai. :) the water was 82F every day. granted, flights to hawaii are more expensive from different areas of the US (we live in california and it's only a 5hr flight).

other thoughts:

1. central american countries less "chic" than costa rica -- nicaragua, el salvador come to mind.
2. caribbean -- DR, cuba (opening up these days; i hear it's expensive to get there, but once you're there, it's ridiculously cheap -- and the beaches are incredible)
3. oregon coast in the summer, san juan islands in the summer


2ndTimer

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #21 on: April 06, 2015, 11:12:08 AM »
Does it need to be a saltwater beach?  If not Michigan has miles of sand beach and is lovely in Summer.  Also relatively cheap since Michigan has been in an economic decline for about 40 years.

mm1970

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #22 on: April 06, 2015, 11:20:49 AM »
Well, it depends on where you live.  If you are looking for a beach, I'd go with a condo or house.  If you want to save money, I'd go somewhere that you could avoid flying.

So, for example, I live in So. Cal.  So I'd go to San Diego.  Many options for condos or hotels with kitchenettes (extended stay hotels) in that area.

If you live on the East Coast, there's Myrtle Beach (and vicinity) or Florida.

If you don't mind flying and are West Coasters, I cannot say enough awesome things about condos in Hawaii.  But that's airfare.

Kris

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #23 on: April 06, 2015, 11:29:43 AM »
So, I have a question.  How much of your husband's honeymoon desire is based on a particular fantasy of romance?  As in, would he be satisfied with a beach in South Carolina, or would he feel like since it's a honeymoon, it has to be someplace "fancy"/typically honeymoon-like, such as the Caribbean? 


Also, a suggestion: if you sense that he is going to be difficult to please, I would definitely suggest to have him do some research and give you, say, three places he'd like to go.  If he has very definite ideas of what he wants, he might make you crazy rejecting anything you offer that doesn't meet his idea of what the vacation should be. 

Kansas Beachbum

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #24 on: April 06, 2015, 12:10:46 PM »
I can second the Cozumel suggestion.  Look at Iberostar resort, very good all inclusive, way away from the main town, so nice and quiet.  Stuff to do on the island if you want, or just hang around the resort.  Would obviously require a passport.  If you want to stay in the States, look at the Florida Keys.  It's got everything from ultra sleepy in the middle keys (Islamorada, Marathon) to party hearty in Key West (also a lot of historical, really fun things to in Key West besides party).  Since DH is not that much in to doing things, I'd suggest staying on Marathon.  There are a lot of nice, quiet condos on the beach (stay ocean side, not bay side), plus it's only an hour from Key West so very easy to run down there for a day of sightseeing/touring.

damize

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Giro

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #26 on: April 06, 2015, 12:19:20 PM »
title does not = topic.


I was thinking turn up the heat in the house and give him a blow job.  He'll think he's on his honeymoon.


partgypsy

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #27 on: April 06, 2015, 12:22:07 PM »
I was also thinking the title meant something else : )

tomsang

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #28 on: April 06, 2015, 12:29:33 PM »
I was also thinking the title meant something else : )

Maybe if she focused on where your dirty mind was heading, then he would want to stay home for his Anniversary:)

Blonde Lawyer

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #29 on: April 06, 2015, 01:58:32 PM »
I think you are getting caught up in some Mustachian guilt.  I think half the battle and benefit of this website and forum is getting us to recognize our "bad" ways and make positive changes towards the end goal.  However, that can have a side effect of making us miserable when we are trying to do something that we previously used to enjoy.  I think instead it is helpful to reframe your thinking.  In the past you may have taken a luxury vacation without thinking twice because that is what you are "supposed" to do.  Now you are being mustachian by trying to make it economical and for recognizing that you are doing something that goes against the philosophy here.  Once you decide you are doing it, however, I think you need to let go of the guilt.  You are making the decision to give your husband his trip.  This is your gift to him.  Once you decide you are doing it, you need to let the guilt go and try to let both of you enjoy it.

At least that is my philosophy for trying to enjoy our upcoming 10 year anniversary trip. :) We are doing tons of other mustachian things so we are ahead of the consumerist game, just not 100% mustachian. 

crispy

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #30 on: April 06, 2015, 01:58:48 PM »
I second the cruise idea.  It can be fairly inexpensive, a passport is generally not required as long as you start and end at the same US port, it is all-inclusive, and you can hit the beach at the ports you are in.

partgypsy

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #31 on: April 06, 2015, 02:54:46 PM »
For those who have done cruising, my question is this. If we do something nice for our 20th, while I am OK including the kids at the least I'd want separate rooms (be 2 adults, 2 kids). For both resorts and cruises, what is the price difference between 1 versus 2 rooms, or do they assume 2 people per room for cruises?

pdxvandal

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #32 on: April 06, 2015, 03:09:16 PM »
Tulum or Puerto Vallarta, Mexico

swick

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #33 on: April 06, 2015, 03:24:50 PM »
I would say include your husband as much as possible since this is very important to him. Ask him if he wants the kids to come and where he wants to go.  If he is looking for a true honeymoon then kids might not be part of that fantasy.

This is important. Like really important. YOU might see it as a great way to knock out two birds with a cheaper stone and have a last  family vacation together before the kids leave, but your kids are basically adults now and they should be able to contribute to pay part of their own way, or you might want to plan a "Family reunion" style trip a year or two after they have all left home.

Keep in mind that marriages are most at risk after when kids are brought into the picture and when they leave. You are at the point where without the common daily bond of raising your kids together, you might discover you both have changed or not kept the strong "couple" bond  together. This might be a good chance to really spend some quality time together, fall in love with each other again and start planning the next stage of your life.

wtjbatman

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #34 on: April 06, 2015, 03:53:52 PM »
I opened this thread expecting something much different.

Sid Hoffman

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #35 on: April 06, 2015, 04:37:05 PM »
I opened this thread expecting something much different.

I was 90% sure it was clickbait, and sure enough the OP got me to click anyway.

My question to the OP would be as such:

Where do you currently live, and what was your most successful beach vacation in the past?

I think that determines a lot as far as what is appropriate or not as far as suggestions go.  Everybody's different and I would hope that after 20 years the OP would have a good idea of what her husband's looking for at least in general.

For example, I love going to the beach too but I would totally rule out Mexico or Florida for specific reasons, as I have been to both places and would not take a vacation there again without an exceptionally good reason.  Everybody is different, however.

crispy

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #36 on: April 06, 2015, 05:50:41 PM »
For those who have done cruising, my question is this. If we do something nice for our 20th, while I am OK including the kids at the least I'd want separate rooms (be 2 adults, 2 kids). For both resorts and cruises, what is the price difference between 1 versus 2 rooms, or do they assume 2 people per room for cruises?

Depends on the deal and the cruise.  Often, it is not that much more to do two rooms versus one room.  How old are your children? If they are old enough to be on their own, a lot of parents will get a nicer room (like a balcony) and then get an inside across the hall for the kids.  You could also do adjoining rooms.  I am not a cruising expert by any stretch (we have been on two and one of those was before kids), but I think cruising can be pretty economical and it's one of those things where you can be as busy or as lazy as you want to be. 

jbfishing

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #37 on: April 06, 2015, 05:52:59 PM »
It will be hard to please your husband with kids in the way. Are you sure he/you want them along on your honeymoon?  You might cut your costs in half if the kids stay home.

justjenn

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #38 on: April 06, 2015, 06:55:19 PM »
Hyatt has all inclusive resorts in Cabo, Cancun, Puerto Vallarta, Montego Bay and Rose Hall (Jamaica). If you and your husband each signed up for a Hyatt credit card, you can get 4 free nights between you at any of their all inclusives.

My fiance and I stayed at the Hyatt Zilara in Cancun this way and we had an amazing time. It was hands down the most luxurious place we've ever stayed and the icing on the cake was never having to pay for a drink or a meal. It was the best use of a sign up bonus I've had to date. The only caveat is that this hotel was adult only (16+), but I know that's not the case for all of their resorts.

Another place I would recommend is Lago de Atitlan in Guatemala. The area is gorgeous! You could rent an apartment near the lake and take advantage of all the cheap food and beer. This might be easier if you plan on bringing the kids.

southern granny

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #39 on: April 06, 2015, 08:08:33 PM »
The florida gulfside beaches are one of our favorite vacation spots.  We go to the area between Tampa and St petersburg.  Summer is off season for them.  We usually get a two bedroom two bath condo on the beach for $750 or less.  It is very relaxing, and the beaches are not crowded, but there is plenty to do if you want.  If you want to take the kids to Disney for a day (or seaworld), it is less than a two hour drive.  When our kids were still home, we went almost every year.  There are good restaurants and shopping areas.   There is a huge weekend flea market that we like to go to.  There is a boardwalk called Johns pass that has all the touristy gift shops but I love to go there because you almost always see dolphins. 

use2betrix

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #40 on: April 07, 2015, 02:38:42 PM »


My Family and I go to Zihuatenajo Mexico every June/July for 10-14 days.  We stay at a crazy nice B&B in a suite 2 kids under 8 YO for about  $200 a night (includes bfast/beach access/ kids program). I go offshore fishing and catch Tuna/Sail fish/ Marlin for $200 a trip.  I barter the Tuna back to a restaurant and get basically 1 free family dinner for every 2 Tuna I catch.  Snorkeling will cost you $5 from the beach or $30 from a boat.   We eat crazy nice and outrageous for $75 a day.  My wife gives me 150 pesos a day for alcohol.  I walk up to local big grocery store.  Buy 2 cases of Pacifico or Corona and take them back to my room.  Then I drink those over the next 2 weeks and buy 3-5 frozen drinks a day on the beach.

I 2nd this. I was glad to see someone else chime in! I was just in Zihuatenajo Mexico for a week with my gf. It was amazing! You could get Corona's on the beach for $1.25. The "best" restaurants I could find with the most amazing views, were still only like $18 for an entree, and that's the absolute best. We could easily go have like 4 Corona's and 4 chimichanga's for around $10 or less.

We stayed at a resort called "Aura Del Mar." My parents, aunt, uncle, cousin - have all been there on two separate occasions, same hotel. We had a suite overlooking the water for $210/night. This included breakfast, which was a delicious breakfast at their connected open air restaurant overlooking the bay.

I was very happy with everything regarding this vacation. You don't even need to make super concrete plans. We just had a rough idea of what we wanted and spent several days just relaxing by the ocean/pool.

Le Poisson

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #41 on: April 07, 2015, 02:48:53 PM »
Would he do a cruise? Different beach every day! Out of Miami, you can book for 7 days at $489 each if you will take an inside lower cabin.

Your drinks are extra but since food is included, you shouldn't incur too much extra expense.

DAY   DATE   PORT   ARRIVE     DEPART
Sun   Apr   19   Miami, FL      4:00pm
Mon   Apr   20   At Sea      
Tue   Apr   21   Cozumel, Mexico   8:00am   5:00pm
Wed   Apr   22   Belize City, Belize   8:00am   5:00pm
Thu   Apr   23   Roatan, Honduras   7:00am   3:00pm
Fri   Apr   24   Grand Cayman, Cayman Islands   10:00am   6:00pm
Sat   Apr   25   At Sea      
Sun   Apr   26   Miami, FL   8:00am   

Not knowing where you live makes it hard to suggest destinations. (East coast/west coast??) 


Fritzy

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #42 on: April 08, 2015, 01:00:49 PM »
My parents live down by Brunswick Beach in Calabash, NC. There is a lovely bird sanctuary, no houses right along the shoreline, and you can really relax. It is close to Myrtle Beach if you want to catch a show one night. There is also a neat little tradition where people write letters and put them in a mailbox that is up on the sand dunes. Here is some more information about it.

http://www.ncbrunswick.com/activity/explore-bird-island-sunset-beach.aspx

For the more adventurous members of the family, I always enjoy kayaking in the intercoastal waterway when I'm visiting there.

Remember - it isn't where you go but who you are with that seems to make the biggest impact on whether a vacation feels like a vacation :)

AllieVaulter

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #43 on: April 08, 2015, 01:23:04 PM »
I think you are getting caught up in some Mustachian guilt.  I think half the battle and benefit of this website and forum is getting us to recognize our "bad" ways and make positive changes towards the end goal.  However, that can have a side effect of making us miserable when we are trying to do something that we previously used to enjoy.  I think instead it is helpful to reframe your thinking.  In the past you may have taken a luxury vacation without thinking twice because that is what you are "supposed" to do.  Now you are being mustachian by trying to make it economical and for recognizing that you are doing something that goes against the philosophy here.  Once you decide you are doing it, however, I think you need to let go of the guilt.  You are making the decision to give your husband his trip.  This is your gift to him.  Once you decide you are doing it, you need to let the guilt go and try to let both of you enjoy it.

At least that is my philosophy for trying to enjoy our upcoming 10 year anniversary trip. :) We are doing tons of other mustachian things so we are ahead of the consumerist game, just not 100% mustachian.

YES!  I'm not sure how sensitive your husband is, but ideally, if you could discuss with him and agree on a budget for the honeymoon that would help relieve some guilt.  You don't have to spend the whole budget, but anywhere within that number, you have no reason to feel guilt. 

I'm also going to second the advice about including your husband in the planning stages.  He sounds like he could be picky, and that can be difficult.  Unless he specifically wants you to do all the planning, I would come to him with several options and see what his feedback is.  Depending on how into it he is, maybe he'll throw out some of his own suggestions. 

And DEFINITELY verify that including the kids is something he finds acceptable for a honeymoon.  As you said, you don't want to hear about this for the next 20 years. 

Tony H

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #44 on: April 08, 2015, 03:19:15 PM »

My Family and I go to Zihuatenajo Mexico every June/July for 10-14 days.  We stay at a crazy nice B&B in a suite 2 kids under 8 YO for about  $200 a night (includes bfast/beach access/ kids program). I go offshore fishing and catch Tuna/Sail fish/ Marlin for $200 a trip.  I barter the Tuna back to a restaurant and get basically 1 free family dinner for every 2 Tuna I catch.  Snorkeling will cost you $5 from the beach or $30 from a boat.   We eat crazy nice and outrageous for $75 a day.  My wife gives me 150 pesos a day for alcohol.  I walk up to local big grocery store.  Buy 2 cases of Pacifico or Corona and take them back to my room.  Then I drink those over the next 2 weeks and buy 3-5 frozen drinks a day on the beach.

Roundtrip flights $400 per person.

Here is a link for Zihuatenajo: http://www.ixtapa-zihuatanejo.com/info/english.htm

My wife and I spent over a month there on our honeymoon about 15 years ago.  Stayed in an apartment with maid for $600.  Wonderful trip.  You do need a passport though. 

shelivesthedream

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #45 on: April 08, 2015, 03:51:25 PM »
Why is DH not planning this?

So DH wants a fancypants honeymoon, and he's fussy about what it's like... But you're doing all the hard work? Give him a budget and tell him to let you know when the plane leaves. You don't worry about keeping costs down because it's up to him to plan within the budget, he gets to plan whatever he wants. Everyone's a winner!

(On a side note, when I have been on holiday before with friends and my now-DH, the deal has been that I do ALL the pre-prep, from booking hotels to printing boarding passes, in exchange for not being bothered about a thing once we get there. It means I get to book what I want in terms of price, style a location for hotels etc, and research anything I want to do, but the actual holiday is really relaxing. They get efficient holiday administration (we actually go instead of just talking about it!) and get to squabble over where to go for dinner.)

JoJo

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #46 on: April 08, 2015, 06:14:48 PM »
You donít say where youíre from so not sure if this requires a flight or is drive-able, but I put in a vote for Florida if it is drive-able.  I usually travel abroad but I did a 10 day trip to Florida last November and had the time of my life.  If you can put more emphasis on a mix of nature and beach rather than crazy expensive amusement parks, I like this.   November is good because itís shoulder season so there are some great deals and places arenít totally filled.  Here are some things I recommend:
In the Keys, I stayed in Islamorada.  I spend a couple nights in a boat I reserved on Airbnb.  Then spent 2 nights in the Key Lantern motel ($45 a night for sun Ė Thursday nights in the low season).  Key Largo has some reasonable snorkeling trips (around $30-40 if I recall).  The Key Lantern is 1 block from the Lorelei restaurant & bar Ė best place for sunset & happy hour ($1 beers) and reasonable prices and a live band every night (think Jimmy Buffet)
In Florida City I stayed at the Everglades Hostel.  They have some family rooms and itís a really cool place to stay (massive tree house, plunge pool & waterfall, free pancakes for breakfast) and open kitchen so you can stop at the nearby Al.  The everglades are great!  So many birds, alligators, and crocodiles.  Then I drove up to the Tampa area.  I saw the mermaid show at the original amusement park Ė Weeki Wachee springs.  Itís a state park and they have several shows and a boat ride.  Really fun for a half day.  You can also kayak or canoe the spring.  The one of the best things I did in my life was snorkeling with Manatees which you can do in Crystal river.  Surprisingly cheap (about $60 for a morning of boating & swimming with Manatees).

shadowmoss

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #47 on: April 09, 2015, 12:06:23 AM »
Cinnamon Bay campground, St John, US Virgin Islands.  You can rent a  cabana with a small kitchen.  If the kids are old enough, bring them tents and put them over on the tent sites for $25/night (at least it was several years ago).  One of the most beautiful beaches in the world.  No passport needed, unless you want to take a day and go over the the British Virgin Islands while you are there.

Le Poisson

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #48 on: April 09, 2015, 05:38:17 AM »
Cinnamon Bay campground, St John, US Virgin Islands.  You can rent a  cabana with a small kitchen.  If the kids are old enough, bring them tents and put them over on the tent sites for $25/night (at least it was several years ago).  One of the most beautiful beaches in the world.  No passport needed, unless you want to take a day and go over the the British Virgin Islands while you are there.

That sounds like an awesome getaway! How did you manage food? I looked up their rates and they've gone up since you were there, but still reasonable. http://www.cinnamonbay.com/rates.html

MandyM

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Re: Help me finally satisfy my husband, please.
« Reply #49 on: April 09, 2015, 05:53:50 AM »
If you are flying somewhere, could you have the kids show up a few days after you do? Could be a nice middle ground between honeymoon and family vacation.