Author Topic: Motivation, please help.  (Read 4405 times)

NearlyThere

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Motivation, please help.
« on: May 05, 2014, 07:44:59 AM »
Hey guys, thought I'd tap into your unbelievable resource of knowledge for myself. I'm in a bit of a rut.

I'm 30 and own 3 businesses which bring me in a very healthy income 100k ($160,000 ish) and from this I save nearly 65-70%. This is on autopilot and I love nothing more than topping up my pensions and investment accounts.

However in my opinion, I do lead an extravagant life: Skiing 3 times the past season winter, Vegas last summer and Ibiza this. I have a great life, but as of late I've literally had no motivation for anything. Business or pleasure.

I've stopped training at the gym, I've gain 20 lbs and I'm really not motivated by being in my business, even though its always been "my thing". I feel I'm waiting on FI to happen, willing it on, one saved pound at a time, then life will be perfect, won't it?

Immediately, I know I need to man up and get over it. Has anyone else felt like this at some point? How did you overcome the hurdle of no motivation?




NumberCruncher

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Re: Motivation, please help.
« Reply #1 on: May 05, 2014, 08:13:52 AM »

I have a great life, but as of late I've literally had no motivation for anything. Business or pleasure.


This sends off a possible depression red flag to me. If you're having trouble enjoying *anything,* especially things you used to enjoy in the past, this will not change in retirement. Focus on your health -  mental and physical. If you've felt this way for a while, it might be worthwhile to find a professional to talk to.


norabird

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Re: Motivation, please help.
« Reply #2 on: May 05, 2014, 08:16:56 AM »
As you know, life won't be perfect at FI, and it shouldn't be on hold until then either. It sounds like you're in a general funk. What are the things in your life that give you meaning? Not skiing or vacationing--rather ways you spend your time that make you feel you are living a good life now? If you don't have any, what do you think they could be?

Everyone goes through slumps but it's no good to stay in them. Personally, I would shift your focus somewhat from looking forward to the payoff of your savings and focus more on the now. I'm not saying save less or spend more--but you can't live in the future. You have to find reasons to be happy with your life in the present. Work alone is not going to do that, nor is a hoard of savings, so what DO you have that makes you feel rewarded on a personal level? Could you volunteer more or invest more time with loved ones, or start a new hobby/pick up an old beloved one? It sounds like time for a shake-up.

NearlyThere

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Re: Motivation, please help.
« Reply #3 on: May 05, 2014, 08:45:45 AM »
Cheers for the response guys. Immediately after I wrote this post, I went on the treadmill and worked out with kettle bells. I def think its a little rut and I just need to give myself that kick in the butt motivation. I absolutely love my wife and spending time with her, so focusing on that and my own health for the next while, will be my priority.

totoro

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Re: Motivation, please help.
« Reply #4 on: May 05, 2014, 09:07:39 AM »
I've been there.  In my case it was not depression but success that stopped me.  I needed to think of new goals that were interesting before I found motivation again.

NearlyThere

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Re: Motivation, please help.
« Reply #5 on: May 05, 2014, 09:09:01 AM »
what did they turn out to be? Your new goals?

totoro

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Re: Motivation, please help.
« Reply #6 on: May 05, 2014, 10:04:18 AM »
I decided to prepare my business for sale - which is pretty involved and will take a couple years, plan a trip with overseas with family and write a book. 

What about kids?  Do you have or want them?  If you do that will get you going like nothing else will.


NearlyThere

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Re: Motivation, please help.
« Reply #7 on: May 05, 2014, 12:36:03 PM »
Prepping 2 of the businesses for sale will be down the line. I'll hold onto the third.

My wife miscarried earlier this year, so we've put it on hold for a little while.

I need to just man up and make things happen. I've never been a negative person and it's not like me.

totoro

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Re: Motivation, please help.
« Reply #8 on: May 05, 2014, 12:39:45 PM »
Could it be that you are grieving?  Miscarriages are tough and putting that on hold is also tough.  Going through it is what it is  - no shortcuts and that is okay but hard - virtual hug.
« Last Edit: May 05, 2014, 12:45:20 PM by totoro »

NearlyThere

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Re: Motivation, please help.
« Reply #9 on: May 05, 2014, 12:45:09 PM »
Could be for sure. I've taken a lot from just starting this thread.

First things first, eat clean, train dirty. Get outside and enjoy whatever good weather we have here in Ireland

Thank you

begood

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Re: Motivation, please help.
« Reply #10 on: May 05, 2014, 12:59:23 PM »

My wife miscarried earlier this year, so we've put it on hold for a little while.


I'm so sorry for your loss, MajorFacepunch. :( Been there. Done that. Twice.

You and your wife have my utmost sympathy - a future you imagined will not take place as you imagined it. That's hard to process! It could definitely be playing a part in how you're feeling, and why things that you once enjoyed no longer have that glow.

My husband went out shortly after our second miscarriage (notice I say "our" and not "my") and bought two gardenia bushes, which he planted outside our front door in memory of those babies that were not to be. I was very touched by that tangible expression of love and grief and remembrance.

I remember telling him I thought nothing good would ever happen again. I definitely grieved. So I say be kind to yourself. Love your wife. Remember this too shall pass.