We're moving this summer to a new state, leaving small town NC -- can't handle the Bible Belt any more.
Our selection went like this:
1. Narrow it down to the state. In our case, I'm from CT, but haven't lived there for 20 years. I still have some family and friends scattered around the state and I'd like to return. DH is on board, so that's where we're going. We'd also considered other states (and countries) where we have friends.
2. Narrow it down to the town. Using various on-line database, I built an XLS with school district rankings, walk scores, housing availability in our price range, distance to my parents (30 minutes or less). Created a weighted score, making the school ranking the most important. This gave us a ranked list.
3. Did some random on-line searches to find out more about each of the top 10 communities. Open space, library system, bike paths, safety, etc. I may also have looked carefully at the ethnic restaurant choices, since where we live now has nothing but crappy pizza and crappy Mexican.
* For us, it was important that we do all this research before stepping foot anywhere. We are aware that we tend to get emotionally invested in decisions too early in the process, so we wanted to hold off any personal connection until we'd learned the facts.
4. On an visit last spring, we checked out the top five towns, and really liked the second. Great schools, nice older neighborhoods, excellent park system with a multi-use path that leads to the grocery store, great library programs for kids, some good but not spendy restaurants, and good resources for local food.
5. Before a visit over winter break, we hooked up with a Realtor, gave her a very specific list of needs and wants, and she came back with a short list of 5 houses. We looked at them, and fell for house #3. It was a short sale and a probate, so it would have a long cycle time (good for us) and the possibility of a great deal. Offer made, accepted, and we should be closing next month. The price is low enough that we don't HAVE to sell our current house first to make it work, but it's going on the market shortly.
Very data heavy process, but was useful for us to help narrow down the thousands of options. We've been talking it up to the kids and have visited it several times to do things like hike the trails, visit the library, go to concerts on the town green, and generally get them excited. They can't wait to move this summer. :)
Good luck with your decisions! :)