Fiance's Car Situation

[Bearblastbeats]

My fiance and I have been thinking of what to do about her going back to work part time/child care.

She plans to go part time to work Tuesday and Thursday nights when I get home because we don't have anyone to watch him during the day. But because the fed is garnishing her wages for neglecting her student loads, she is going to barely make enough to cover her phone bill, credit cards, and car payment.

I offered to give her my VW because its paid off, runs perfect, has everything up to date, new tires and timing belt and major engine service for high mileage. Insurance on it is 75 a month. So i could give her my car, she could either sell her car or get it repossessed, or we trade in to something else and I cosign and absorb the loan on something else.

What are your thoughts?

[plog]

The pot is slowly boiling and you guys don't even know it.  Your situation is a time bomb. You guys are in desperate need of Dave Ramsey.    Google that and get on his system.

For your specific question he's going to say share a beater.  You guys should own 1 crappy but reliable car, that sounds like your VW.  Sell every other car and apply any cash you get to outstanding debt per his baby steps. 

[seemsright]

The pot is slowly boiling and you guys don't even know it.  Your situation is a time bomb. You guys are in desperate need of Dave Ramsey.    Google that and get on his system.

For your specific question he's going to say share a beater.  You guys should own 1 crappy but reliable car, that sounds like your VW.  Sell every other car and apply any cash you get to outstanding debt per his baby steps.

I hate Dave Ramsey...I think his program is a song and dance to make himself richer. I never...NEVER!!!! agree when someone says Dave Ramsey's program. but in this case I cannot agree with plog more You need to figure out how to get out from under the time bomb you are under.

Forget the car...sell it and everything else. It sounds like you need to live on rice and beans and have your two feet to get to your jobs...at this point I would not even recommend a bicycle due to you not being able to afford to maintain it. You need to get out from this and NOW.

You have a ton of work to do, you have a lot to clean up and to learn. I say get on the same page and do the work because on the other side life can be really smooth sailing.

[cincystache]

So i could give her my car, she could either sell her car or get it repossessed, or we trade in to something else and I cosign and absorb the loan on something else.

+1 for Dave Ramsey.

He would rip you apart and then build you back up... Don't co-sign, don't take out another loan, and don't get repossessed. Sell the car, take out a loan for the difference (if necessary) and buy a beater. Follow his baby steps at least 1-3.

[marty998]

She sure as hell shouldn't have a credit card if she can't afford to pay her existing debts (student loans).

How big is the phone bill? Maybe replace with a cheap $10 a month flip phone if she can't afford to pay for her existing bills too.

[AccidentalMiser]

Don't take this wrong but I wouldn't consider marrying someone irresponsible with money.

I'll also go +2 on the Dave Ramsey suggestion.

[Taran Wanderer]

Whoa, let the facepunches fly!!!

In all seriousness to the OP, if you are going to get married, then these are your student loans that are overdue, your car payment, your phone bill, your credit card bills.  If you are not prepared to take on these debts, then you really need to reconsider getting married.  It sounds like there is a little one in the picture, so let's just assume you're all in.  And to that, I say Good for you!  You're a good man, Charlie Brown.

Now, what do you do?  I think that is pretty well covered up above.  Cut back on everything.  Cut to the bone.  Sell your fiance's car.  Cut your phone bills to the simplest possible.  Establish an emergency fund.  Pay off those student loans and get out of the garnishment.  Eliminate your (yes, by your I mean your fiance as well) debt and get both of yourselves in the black.  Do this together, and it will make your marriage stronger.  Avoid it, and it will be a cancer that follows you for years, and may fester into a growth that drives you apart.  Do it together, or get out now.

[calimom]

@Taran Wanderer 's toughlove is spot on. OP, you are in the family way now, so strip it all back, get rid of all car payments, including the ridiculous Audi payment you have. You've got a good job, a sweet baby and a new life. What are the childcare options where you live? If not up to par, can your fiance take in a couple of kids during the day? And work the part time evening gig? Tough but doable. You guys can crush this debt, you know you can. Keep the paid for VW and ditch anything that is not absolutely urgent.

We're pulling for you. Looking forward to your follow up.

[nick663]

I feel like reading the original post only displays a small portion of the financial issues present and just those are an absolute emergency.  I don't like Dave Ramsey but I'd think his initial steps could be helpful here regarding getting out of debt and getting things at least to a sustainable point.  List out the debts, start eliminating monthly expenses, sell spare stuff you don't need, find supplemental income, etc.

If the finance cannot work during hours that you are not home, why not go down to 1 car?  That's a huge chunk of extra money right there.

[Dicey]

I have Dave Ramsey's investment advice, but I think his get out of debt spiel is okay. Take the advice. Follow him until your hair is no longer on FIRE, then come back here for investment advice.

Sorry to pile on, but you apparently chose to make a baby with someone who has shown a history of poor decision making. Her problems are now yours. Own them, and figure a way out of them together, but don't be surprised if it happens again in the future, primarily because kids are expensive, and she may want things that aren't in your austerity budget. Only saying this so you can be prepared.

[ShoulderThingThatGoesUp]

Dealing with this isn’t going to be easier with a newborn. You need your shit together now. The two of you need a mutual plan to be a stable family.

And approach this gently, because pregnancy feelings are extra big, but make it clear it’s for the baby.

[chemistk]

OP, reading through your post history, I really must agree with the above posters and advise you to put a hard stop on everything in your life.

A good baseline for OP's expenses (for anyone reading this) is this thread: https://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/welcome-to-the-forum/so-how-do-i-fire-if-i-just-bought-a-house/msg2194307/#msg2194307

You lost almost a quarter of your combined after-tax income after your baby was born, and you recently purchased a house that's now edging into unaffordability. This, and your affinity for German cars plus your drum hobby puts you and your fiance one unfortunate accident away from financial ruin.

Further, and I mean this in the most mustachian face-punchey way, but you seem to have a history of poor financial decisions. At one point your credit was in the toilet, you've been through at least 4 or 5 cars in the past few years, you had to take a loan out against your 401(k), and had a car loan at a nearly 20% APR(!!).

But, don't look at the doom and gloom either. A lot of your posts seem to center on figuring out how to improve your life situation and yet if you take a step back, you seem to be doing just that. You've moved jobs a couple times and increased your salary significantly. Your last hop cut your commute to a reasonable 8 miles (from 40). You are absolutely capable of continuing this upward trend.

I urge you to do a case study. Like, yesterday. include your and your fiance's income, expenses, assets, etc. Expect that the advice given here (or even by DR should you choose to pursue) is not going to be something easy to stomach at first.