I am feeling very stuck in my current situation and could use some advice and perspective.
First off, to acknowledge that I understand I am in an exceptionally privileged position. I am married with two kids, age 6 and 3. We have enough resources that many on this board would already be RE, but live in a HCOL and are a bit spendy so can't actually cover our current expenses.
Now for the issues: I discovered MMM about a year ago, and have spend the last year understanding our assets and spending and have a very good handle on it. I know that if we chose to move to a LCOL area and cut back in some simple ways (cell, cable, expensive coffee) we could both stop working forever based on the 4% rule. We don't have quite enough to securely cover the college costs, which is important, but could probably either work for 2-3 more years, or commit to some PT work to add more to the college savings. I also happen to really, really, really strongly dislike cold winters and being cooped up indoors from November-April, and would love to move to the southeast or southwest.
DH, however, has no interest. He says I have "changed." He wants to work for 15 more years and will not consider moving. He is okay with me quitting my job, and fine with me traveling with the kids whenever they are on vacation. It seems like he and I are no longer compatible with each other, and not really interested in the same things. He wants the kids to play sports, and expects they won't want to travel, or be interested in hiking/kayaking/rock climbing when they are older. We did all these things before we had kids, and I would love to take my kids on lots of adventures like this.
I feel like no matter what, the next 15 years I will be trapped in a location I don't like much for most of the year and unable to make much change. This makes me really resent DH and his inflexibility, which makes me feel even more like we have no connection. Of course, I have two kids so the idea of divorce is really abhorrent, but I have started to think about it. I feel overwhelmingly sad and trapped at times, and find it hard to even enjoy my kids. I have felt this way for about two weeks, and know that if things don't change it will start to affect them negatively.
Any advice, perspective, or ideas to try would be most welcome.