I'm leaving a toxic workplace (have been there 11 yrs and it's been bad since the start) and negotiating my exit terms has been a very stressful experience over the last 5 days - it got so bad at one point that I brought someone to one of the meetings to act as my ally so they couldn't gang up on me as easily. I'm a part owner of the company so there are a bunch of financial issues to address.
I was more than fair in my separation terms offer by nearly any measure (main issues are: what 2015 expenses need to be settled up, and what additional costs will I pay) but I am getting continued pushback to concede more and more things to them. Their latest counter-offer to my reasonable 2nd offer is sitting in my inbox. I haven't replied.
I can't decide between saying:
(1) Fuck you, my last offer was fair, even generous to you, and if you don't agree to that then I agree to no additional costs. Pro: I stand up for myself after being shit on for years. They have no legal basis to sue me for the add'l costs. Con: they blacklist me from all future subcontracting work with them, and take every opportunity to smear my professional name. [Note: mine is a small professional community, but their smear campaign probably wouldn't do me much harm because I have a strong reputation.]
(2) Counter their counter, and say this is my last & final, and if you can't agree to this, then I guess we'll go forward with no agreement on the last couple of items. Pro: there is probably still room to negotiate back some dollars. Con: I have to spend more time negotiating with complete assholes. It has taken an enormous emotional toll already. And, if they don't accept my last & final, we will effectively be at war and I will probably be blacklisted - see above.
(3) Agree to their counter just to be done with it. Pro: I'm free! Onward and upward! In the grand scheme of things, we're not talking huge dollars (a few thousand). And, they claim they will keep staffing me on work which will help fill some income gaps at least in the short-run and likely make up for what I pay them. Con: I am giving in yet AGAIN to them; they get far more money from me than they are entitled to; and they haven't actually promised to staff me on things, just talked nicely about it.
Mustachians, what would you do? My DH, my sister, and my dad all have different opinions and I don't have a clear gut instinct on this one.
[Also, this is a really complex situation and I've left out tons of detail in an effort to be concise. I can add more if helpful.]