Author Topic: Dear forum members  (Read 6819 times)

guy

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Dear forum members
« on: January 08, 2015, 12:43:17 PM »
Dear forum members
I thought for a month of deliberation whether to publish this post.
Please you, call a few minutes of your time, I will try to reduce as much as possible.

First let me introduce myself and then I'll explain why I appealed to you
My name is Guy, an Israeli Jew, lived in Israel in a rented apartment in the city as "Petah Tikva".
More in my youth I remember my friends and I would walk and excited about every little thing, kids.
I remember we were walking in cities rich and luxurious homes excited about,
Then we ask, "Do you think that the day will come and we will be the one?".
We mainly dream and share stories with each other about successful people in the world, inspiring,
And are trying to work as a model.
As the years went by I did not have the resources and the initial money to start my own business,
And to tell the truth, I was afraid to crash.
Years have passed since then. Today I am 26 years old.
Since my release from the IDF until six months ago, I worked as a hired as a salesman in all kinds of companies in Israel.
I wanted to share with you since getting laid off from work last, I looked for many jobs, I went to a job interview and not was accepted.
Slowly I began to go to bed late at night and get up in the afternoon and so I could not go further job interviews, the reason I was Mentally destroyed and could not get up in time It made me get up at night and sleep in the morning.
Also go to the employment office and receive unemployment benefits could not

Today I'm drowning in my own debt, all my credit cards blocked.
With limited accountability minus 60 thousand shekels.
(Yes, in Israel you can enter a negative account)
Today, I have no money to pay rent and each time I find another excuse to pull the landlady, Meanwhile hoping things work out the economic situation.
the companies Orange and American Express began threatening me with legal treatments that I can not raise money to close the debt.
The current situation at the moment is that I have no money to buy food for myself.
Last week I started to go out and look for money on the floor all over the place,
Hoping perhaps to find certain amount, even though I know the chances are very small.

You might be asking yourself if I use the family and friends?
To tell the truth, my parents helped me pay rent each month and it is also the owner of the apartment after persuasion take their help.
My parents helped me to pay one month's rent, and that's even after they persuading me to accept their help and I'm ashamed to contact them and friends.
I short distance from taking a loan gray market and I fear A situation that I can not get out.

I know there are people in their situation worse my situation sink into enormous debt and thrown into the street, i know and I do not want to get to it because I know that with a little help I get out of all this mess.
I helped a lot of courage to write this letter and its English translation. And the very dilemma whether to send it at all.
After all, we do not know each other You do not have interest in helping me

If you read the letter so far so I'm really sorry for taking your precious time, I wrote a letter rather long.
The reason I turned your forum, it is just a gut feeling. And of course a shame to publish such a letter at Israel.
I'm a perfectly normal, sometimes easier to open a person far and tell you what is in your heart really, than a relative.

If you can help me out of the goodness of your heart, you did a mitzvah and I will not forget you have it forever.

Sincerely, Guy

trailrated

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #1 on: January 08, 2015, 12:52:35 PM »
This seems incredibly spammy and like it should have "in the arms of the angels" sadly playing in the background showing pictures of abused animals.

However if this is legit, please make it a little more clear what you are looking for. If it is a place to vent, fine go for it. If you are looking for money you are at the wrong place. If you are looking for motivation, or budget help... that is what we do.

Louisville

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #2 on: January 08, 2015, 12:53:36 PM »
Wow, guy, I don't want to discourage you,  but the language barrier may be too much to overcome. However, I strongly encourage you to follow these guidelines and post a case study.

http://forum.mrmoneymustache.com/ask-a-mustachian/how-to-write-a-'case-study'-topic/

Louisville

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #3 on: January 08, 2015, 01:00:25 PM »
This seems incredibly spammy and like it should have "in the arms of the angels" sadly playing in the background showing pictures of abused animals.

However if this is legit, please make it a little more clear what you are looking for. If it is a place to vent, fine go for it. If you are looking for money you are at the wrong place. If you are looking for motivation, or budget help... that is what we do.

Yeah, though part of the issue might be that it's been run through an online translator.  One can get strange results, especially with translations between languages from different language families.

guy

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #4 on: January 08, 2015, 01:01:11 PM »

This is not spam. This is my letter to the forum
It's the only place I jotted it down And the only place I'll write it probably.
Sorry for my weak English language

swick

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #5 on: January 08, 2015, 01:16:21 PM »
You might be asking yourself if I use the family and friends?
To tell the truth, my parents helped me pay rent each month and it is also the owner of the apartment after persuasion take their help.
My parents helped me to pay one month's rent, and that's even after they persuading me to accept their help and I'm ashamed to contact them and friends.
I short distance from taking a loan gray market and I fear A situation that I can not get out.

You need to accept the fact that you NEED your parents help right now. Move back home. Start taking care of yourself. No more late nights. Get up every morning and get dressed as if you are going to work, and spend 8 hours a day looking for a job.  Network with everyone you meet. Pay attention to the image you are showing people.

If you can't find a job right away - volunteer. It will get you experience and give you some self-esteem. at this point, YOU are the only person that can help you.

pzxc

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #6 on: January 08, 2015, 01:20:23 PM »
Do not put yourself in a worse situation by taking a "grey market loan".

There's an expression:  When you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is "stop digging".

What are the bankruptcy laws like in Israel?  Is that a possibility?

Can you move to a cheaper city or even a cheaper country? Is that a possibility?

southern granny

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #7 on: January 08, 2015, 01:26:35 PM »
Guy.  I am sorry you are having such a bad time of it.  First of all you need to see a physician to see if you need to be treated for depression.  That could help a lot.  Please do not borrow money from the wrong places.  American express is not going to beat you up or kill you, but a loan shark might.  Is it possible for you to return to the home of your parents until you can get straightened out?  You were in the military.  Did you see combat?  Perhaps you are having some type of stress reaction to your experiences.  You need to be asking for help.  From your parents, your government, whoever can help you.    If you were my son, I would want you to come home and to seek treatment, and then try to find a job.  I wish you the best.

zinnie

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #8 on: January 08, 2015, 01:31:08 PM »
Guy,

I am very sorry to hear about your situation. People here tend to ask two questions in a situation like yours:
-How can you increase your income?
-How can you reduce your expenses?

It sounds like you are feeling depressed, so please take care of yourself and go see a physician to deal with that if it is a possibility. You mentioned that you can not get employment benefits. Why not? Is it because you are ashamed or because they are not available to you? Right now your goal needs to be to increase your income. If you can get benefits while continuing to look for a job I would recommend doing that. It sounds like any income you can bring in right now will put you in a better position.

As far as increasing income, here are some things I would consider:
What is the job market like where you live right now? If there are no jobs, can you move somewhere else? Are there skills you can obtain that will put you in a better position to find work in the future? Can you find temporary or contract work in another place or another country?

And for expenses:
Is there anything you are paying for that is not absolutely necessary right now? The apartment seems like the first thing to consider. Can you move in with parents or friends until you get in a better position?

Try to focus on what you can DO, right now, to put yourself in a better situation in the future. Believe in yourself and don't be afraid to use the resources available to you. Consider doing something drastic, like moving away, if all other options are exhausted. Try not to spend any of your mental effort being ashamed about the past and try to focus on what you can do for the future.

I wish you luck and hope that you can find a way out of this situation.




Future Lazy

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #9 on: January 08, 2015, 01:32:32 PM »
You might be asking yourself if I use the family and friends?
To tell the truth, my parents helped me pay rent each month and it is also the owner of the apartment after persuasion take their help.
My parents helped me to pay one month's rent, and that's even after they persuading me to accept their help and I'm ashamed to contact them and friends.
I short distance from taking a loan gray market and I fear A situation that I can not get out.

You need to accept the fact that you NEED your parents help right now. Move back home. Start taking care of yourself. No more late nights. Get up every morning and get dressed as if you are going to work, and spend 8 hours a day looking for a job.  Network with everyone you meet. Pay attention to the image you are showing people.

If you can't find a job right away - volunteer. It will get you experience and give you some self-esteem. at this point, YOU are the only person that can help you.

+1 All of this is an excellent way to get back on your feet. Accepting help leads to recovery!

guy

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #10 on: January 08, 2015, 01:37:38 PM »
Do not put yourself in a worse situation by taking a "grey market loan".

There's an expression:  When you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is "stop digging".

What are the bankruptcy laws like in Israel?  Is that a possibility?

Can you move to a cheaper city or even a cheaper country? Is that a possibility?

Switch to a cheaper country is not an option because it get away from it all,  A move that would cause me to double the debt because of high interest rates
In the past I took a US visa I had planned to work in carts but not executed

About bankruptcy in Israel that means I are deployed in the so-called debt for decades and I have to pay 100 shekels ($ 25) each month.
But then again I can not manage a bank account. No credit cards and no standing orders.

guy

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #11 on: January 08, 2015, 01:48:34 PM »

Try to focus on what you can DO, right now, to put yourself in a better situation in the future. Believe in yourself and don't be afraid to use the resources available to you. Consider doing something drastic, like moving away, if all other options are exhausted. Try not to spend any of your mental effort being ashamed about the past and try to focus on what you can do for the future.

I wish you luck and hope that you can find a way out of this situation.

Thank you very much
You made me smile on face

marty998

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #12 on: January 08, 2015, 02:09:27 PM »
With your training could you rejoin the military?

zinnie

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #13 on: January 08, 2015, 02:24:47 PM »

Try to focus on what you can DO, right now, to put yourself in a better situation in the future. Believe in yourself and don't be afraid to use the resources available to you. Consider doing something drastic, like moving away, if all other options are exhausted. Try not to spend any of your mental effort being ashamed about the past and try to focus on what you can do for the future.

I wish you luck and hope that you can find a way out of this situation.

Thank you very much
You made me smile on face

You are very welcome. Please let us know how you are doing, and keep your head up!

projekt

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #14 on: January 09, 2015, 11:45:20 AM »
It sounds like you are bankrupt. You should file for bankruptcy if you cannot find another way (parents?) to discharge your debt. Don't let guilt or shame impede this. The longer you wait, the worse your trouble.

It also sounds like you are clinically depressed. It can be very hard to find work when you are depressed. If you have not sought medical attention, you need to do it.

You should move in with family and ask them to help you through these times. It is difficult to face this on your own.

Daley

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #15 on: January 09, 2015, 02:02:00 PM »
שלום. אנא סלח לי אני לא מדבר טוב עברית. גם לסלוח המילים הנועזות שלי. זה המאמץ שלי לתיקון עולם

אל תוותרו. אתה יכול להתגבר על הנסיבות שלך. זה לא חוב בלתי עביר

אתה אהב. זכור את זה. מניחים את האמון שלך בה '. בואו ישוע להיות אבן ראש הפינה. הצג מאמץ כדי להחזיר את החיים שלך. המשפחה שלך תעזור

שקול חיי קיבוץ. להתידד. רשת

אתה תהיה בתפילות שלי

ברכה והצלחה
« Last Edit: January 09, 2015, 02:07:06 PM by I.P. Daley »

guy

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #16 on: January 10, 2015, 09:58:25 AM »
שלום. אנא סלח לי אני לא מדבר טוב עברית. גם לסלוח המילים הנועזות שלי. זה המאמץ שלי לתיקון עולם

אל תוותרו. אתה יכול להתגבר על הנסיבות שלך. זה לא חוב בלתי עביר

אתה אהב. זכור את זה. מניחים את האמון שלך בה '. בואו ישוע להיות אבן ראש הפינה. הצג מאמץ כדי להחזיר את החיים שלך. המשפחה שלך תעזור

שקול חיי קיבוץ. להתידד. רשת

אתה תהיה בתפילות שלי

ברכה והצלחה


מקווה מאוד שאני אצא מהבוץ הזה בקרוב
אני מאמין בה' אמונה שלמה וגם התחזקתי בתקופה האחרונה
תודה רבה חבר
שה' יברך אותך

Daley

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #17 on: January 12, 2015, 10:50:43 AM »
מקווה מאוד שאני אצא מהבוץ הזה בקרוב
אני מאמין בה' אמונה שלמה וגם התחזקתי בתקופה האחרונה
תודה רבה חבר
שה' יברך אותך

בבקשה לשמור אותנו נוכחי על המצב שלך
כל טוב אח


Edit: My apologies to the community in general, I didn't intend to derail the thread with a language shift. For those curious to know what I said, Google Translate does Hebrew, but to nutshell, they were words of gentle encouragement and a bit of advice including looking into possibly volunteering at a kibbutz and to network. Some of the other suggestions thus far in this thread have been good, and it wasn't my intention to diminish those ideas. I've also asked that he keep us posted.
« Last Edit: January 12, 2015, 11:14:58 AM by I.P. Daley »

Rural

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #18 on: January 12, 2015, 04:31:04 PM »
I, for one, was busy admiring the lovely alphabet, trying to fathom reading from right to left, and imagining the two of you solving all the world's problems for us.

PEIslander

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #19 on: January 12, 2015, 06:09:10 PM »
I, for one, was busy admiring the lovely alphabet...

Me too!

Letj

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #20 on: January 12, 2015, 07:36:21 PM »
This sounds like a Nigerian scam. All we need is his bank account to wire him some cash.

bo_knows

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #21 on: January 13, 2015, 10:22:47 AM »
This sounds like a Nigerian scam. All we need is his bank account to wire him some cash.

Did you just read the OP and completely skip over the rest of the thread? There's just a language barrier here, and a few forum members are trying to help overcome it.

Future Lazy

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #22 on: January 13, 2015, 10:57:45 AM »
This sounds like a Nigerian scam. All we need is his bank account to wire him some cash.

Did you just read the OP and completely skip over the rest of the thread? There's just a language barrier here, and a few forum members are trying to help overcome it.

Seriously.

@I.P. Daley - I translated what you had to say and found it to be very encouraging and beautiful, and can't even imagine how overwhelmed Guy must be to see you reach out in his native language to bridge the gap and bring comfort in a difficult time.

Daley

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Re: Dear forum members
« Reply #23 on: January 13, 2015, 11:51:15 AM »
@I.P. Daley - I translated what you had to say and found it to be very encouraging and beautiful, and can't even imagine how overwhelmed Guy must be to see you reach out in his native language to bridge the gap and bring comfort in a difficult time.

I'm sure it brought a few chuckles to him as well. I'm still learning Hebrew, and the focus has been liturgical and biblical, not the conversational stuff... I had to cheat on more than a few words, and I have no doubt that my Hebrew is barely a full step removed from somewhere between childish gibberish and pure Google Translate. All things considered though, he reached out to us in our native tongue seeking counsel. It was the least I could do in return.

Language barriers should never be a justification for ugly behavior.

Anyway, for those genuinely interested in trying to help, do try to understand the cultural differences between our slices of this marble - including with regard to matters of debt and bankruptcy (which the latter is still a newer legal concept) in Israel. Have a little background (just scraping the surface) that helps give a better perspective for us to better understand what Guy is struggling with not just financially, but culturally:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jewish_views_of_poverty,_wealth_and_charity
http://www.csun.edu/~re38791/pdfs/Political_Economy_of_Personal_Bankruptcy_In_Israel.pdf
http://voleh.org/bankruptcy-in-israel-2014/