Yet another one of my updates:
I just got a call for an outsourced position at a tech company.
Outsourced here(MX) means probably more work, more money, less "401k" benefits but that doesn't matter to me at this moment.
The best thing about that position is location, the good company is a mere 0.52 miles from my house, for the first time in my life I could "perhaps" walk to work and join the walk/bike to work mustachians team!!!
Also I'm trying to negotiate more money at my current job, since I'm about to be promoted to the oh-so-promised coordinator position.
It was a good thing that my boss quit, cause I'm now in the position to negotiate harder.
Thank you all who have taken the time to post something, I've certainly been through some ups and downs in the past few months (more downs than ups) and I can't imagine how draining it can be to read my updates, I'm starting to get annoyed at myself for being such a whiny pants haha. Also kudos to the important people in my life who have been on my side or offering a shoulder to cry on.
Your assumptions are fair enough.
My manager said she knows for sure he's been LUCKY, that's all.
He's lucky he knows a certain area of the company and his area coworker is on sick leave.
Then another coworker left the company and since this guy had way too much free time, they decided to give him the leaving guy's chores.
Meanwhile they didn't leave their tasks to me because I've been busy working on other projects for the company.
So now this guy knows about two areas and that's why they want him.
And I know I sound petty and jealous, but guess what, my manager agreed with my reaction as she's been through the same situation in the past. I don't think it's bad to compare and be upset when this guy and I started working on the same company on the very same day, and when my workload has been bigger than his.
I am afraid of looking petty to other coworkers who will not understand my reaction, but honestly if you haven't been in the same situation it's really really hard to put yourself in my shoes and very very easy to judge.
You just said it right there, this guy has more knowledge, and it makes sense with more knowledge to be in a higher management roll. It doesn't matter how he got the knowledge. A lot of times it's luck. A lot of time, it takes effort.
I'm trying to change your perspective. You are suggesting that because you started at the same time with your coworker amongst other factors, that somehow you are owed a certain salary or position whether at this company or the next. Get out of that mindset. What you fail to see is that the reason you keep getting passed over by your coworker is that he's somehow more marketable than you are for the positions in question.
Lunasol,
I think what you're doing and what you've been doing sound great. Watching the competition is smart. Comparing yourself to others in your class is good so you know where you fall. And competition can be great as long as you have boundaries. Now just take it to the next level.
First, realize that some people are just lucky, or just get better breaks. I see a lot of people who joined an organization and all rose up the ranks at the same time, then another similar organization where people skyrocketed to the top because there were openings available. Nothing made those people better, they were just in the right place at the right time. That happens. We call those the people "golden" because it seems sometimes that they get all the breaks and all the good luck.
So now you just have to figure out how you can get the good luck and how you can position yourself to be in line for the good breaks.
I'm going to agree with others who said you need to show mgmt that you can do the next job (not just your own job). Spend time outside of the office learning new skills. Take courses. Request training that will make you more valuable for the next job you want. Identify the path you want to take, and not just "I want to be equal with co-worker".
By the way, why has your workload been greater than his? Why did you accept that? Is that something you can leverage in the future?
Thank you BlueHouse, your perspective is what I needed to hear.
Other people close to me who know of my situation with much more detail than I posted here also call it "dumb luck", I'll accept that and move on.
As for the work load, we're divided into teams under the same manager, and their workload was different than mine. Manager has slowly been moving some of my team's responsibilities to them, and that's why he's a "key" element at this moment.
DJFlare99 and vivophoenix, will you please watch it? Your comments seem rather harsh. Can you be a little nicer, please? It's perfectly okay for OP to work through her stuff here. You can offer helpful advice, or you can be jerks. Both of these comments feel more the latter than the former.
You sound petty and jealous.
...it sounds like he was promoted because he knew more, rather than you, who worked more.
who cares if you started the first day? looking in, it sounds like you assumed being a work horse is the key success. i have seen a lot of people who do that. often women.
Thank you Diane for your kind words. I am struggling here with this situation and that's why I politely asked everyone to be nice, but I knew beforehand that not everyone is nice on message boards.
I do know I might sound jealous, well that's because I am. I don't think it's that bad because I'd rather be jealous and competitive than not care about my career at all, I have worked hard and I will continue to work harder, because I am not less deserving than anyone else.