Anything she wants to control? That's the correct answer for a happy marriage.
Wow, thanks for all the feedback everybody, this is a great community! OK, the title wasn't the best, but it was what was on my mind when I got started on posting, it's not like I think like that, I love my wife and family, but ER has become a source of friction. A little more info, my wife has not worked since our first child 10 yrs ago, we have 2. I don't think that my income is necessary to disclose, let's just say I'm at the prime of my career. However, I love spending time at home and my job gets in the way more and more. Sometimes I think the trade-off is reasonable, even if we do have good savings, but there are more and more signs that I should hang it up and make ER work. For instance, this week I was driving home and saw a guy in a nasty motorcycle accident and thought about how much I hate my commute and how short my healthy life may be. Yesterday, I had a typical one of those stressful time rushes between getting home late until going to bed of getting a child across town for tae kwon do while my wife ran our daughter to gymnastics, getting dinner, getting my jog in after the sun was setting, shower, read with the kids... I was on MMM, exhausted, and know that there is a better way to live!
I was of the opinion of the person I quoted for a long time, but it means that I stay at the grindstone even if I know we can live within our means and have conquered the ER math (
http://www.mrmoneymustache.com/2012/01/13/the-shockingly-simple-math-behind-early-retirement). I thought a nice chunk of cash would give her the freedom to be independent, and if she wants to go back to work while I stay home, she can also spend that. I have tried to convince her that we are financially independent (if I handle the finances), but without a paycheck she thinks that it's not possible - too many unknowns lurking in the future. Sometimes I feel like we have pulled a 'Mustachian 180' in the wrong direction!