When I patch it myself pssssssss after 3 rides. When I go to my son school using there patching service it last for a long time. Been 2 years now.
It sounds like you're doing it wrong. Prep work is important to get a patch that will last First find the hole. You might need to inflate the tube to stretch it and hear the leak. If it's right next to the valve stem it's probably not worth patching, otherwise mark it with a sharpie unless it's obvious. Then clean the tube. At least wipe off any dirt/dust, but ideally clean the area to be patched with something like rubbing alcohol. Next sand the area. You need to sand down any ridges so there's no gap for air to escape, and you are also sanding off any release agent left on the tube and making a rough surface to help the glue bond. It's hard to sand too much, and if often takes me 10 minutes of sanding with the little scrap of sandpaper that comes in a patch kit. Once an area larger than the patch is sanded flat and smooth, wipe off any excess rubber dust. Apply a
thin layer of glue to an area larger than the patch and let it dry. About 10-15 minutes is usually good. A thinner layer will dry faster. It won't work to put the patch on while it's still wet, and it always seems weird to me to let it dry too long, but it will still work even after it's completely dry.
While the patch is drying, check the tire for anything that might cause a flat. Sharp things sticking through are a common cause, but a hole in the tire could do it, too. If the hole is on the rim side of the tube, not the tire side, check the rim and make sure the rim tape is good and covering any spokes/holes/sharp spots.
Now apply the patch and press firmly. I usually squeeze it in my hands for a minute, but I don't think that's completely necessary. It's an instant bond. You should leave the clear plastic that's stuck to the top side of the patch. I'm not sure why it's there but removing it will usually damage the patch.
Now reinstall the tube and tire. It's common practice to line the tire label up with the valve stem so that next time you get a flat you know where to look for something sharp on the tire. Make sure the tire is on in the right direction, if applicable for your bike.
You'll get the best results with a good quality patch kits. Most patch kits sold at most bike shops are good quality. Park Tool and Rema are good. Don't get glueless patches, they won't last.
One trick I learned recently is that if you're patching at home, you can use rubber cement instead of the little bottle of glue in the patch kit that dries up after one use. I put the rubber cement only on the tube and didn't let it dry as much as I normally would since it didn't seem to stick to the patch very well after drying. Then I clamped the patch under some books and let it dry overnight. It didn't seem as strong as the regular glue, but it's held air ever since. Contact cement may be better since I think the formulation is more similar to the glue in patch kits. My office supply store had rubber cement (Elmers) in a jar or contact cement in a large tube. The rubber cement is made of rubber and heptane, and the contact cement had other solvents and stuff, and I think the formulation was more similar to the glue that comes with patch kits. Rubber cement was a bit cheaper, though, and it's what a guy at a bike shop recommended.
REI recycles old tubes. Sometimes they have a bin up front, otherwise you can hand them to someone at the bike service desk.