The area you're referring to is lovingly called "the taint" in our area.
As somebody mentioned, it could be the bike fit, it also could be the saddle tilt or even the saddle width.
Unless you have a huge drop from seat down to handle bars, make sure your seat is level or even tilted slightly upward. This helps make sure you're sitting far enough back that your sit bones are nestled in the back of the seat where they should be and that you're not sliding forward.
They might be inclined to say it's got a lot to do with your weight, but as a fellow 220 lber that's not always true. I had a saddle that once just didn't fit right width wise and it bruised the heck out of my sit bones, to the point where I couldn't ride. A saddle swap fixed it.
And as far as bike fit goes, I rode bikes too small for me for years at 5-10 mile distances daily without saddle problems, so dont let a shop sell you a new bike on that notion.
I also only throw on padded shorts for 30+ mile rides.