Quality of life is MUCH higher outside of the NY metro area and a "normal" salary stretches a lot farther. Your question is too broad. You need to narrow down what is important to you, e.g. Year-round temperate climate, tolerance for rain/overcast days, extreme heat/dryness, humidity, or snow, culture, casual outdoorsy lifestyle, four seasons, religious preferences, access to your sports activities, hobbies, need to be near international airport for travel, visiting family, etc. Once you get this, look at the states that have no income tax (Nevada, Washington, Florida, etc.) and the states that have no sales tax (Oregon, Montana, NH, etc.) which match your criteria. Also look at states like Georgia where the cost of housing is low. Then decide if you need an urban setting or if you prefer suburban or rural living. City living, even in an affordable city, has lots of temptations for spending money. But socializing may be easier and jobs more plentiful. In rural areas, land is cheap but you need a car to get everywhere and you could spend a small fortune on gas commuting to work and social functions. Furthermore, jobs can be scarce. Some smaller communities can be less welcoming to outsiders so don't just fall in love with the scenery without checking out jobs, social compatibility, religious affiliations, and anything else that will affect your family.
There is no perfect place -- and frankly some places are more difficult for people from the northeast to assimilate into -- but if you spend some time in a few different communities that seem like they are a good match for your values, you will probably be able to create a great new life for yourselves. I escaped from the northeast a decade ago. It was easy to leave but took a long time to carve out a new life in a different culture and I'm still working on it. But it was one of the best decisions that I've ever made and I should have done it sooner. Go for it!