Author Topic: Babies... some people make it sound so easy  (Read 46311 times)

Christiana

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Re: Babies... some people make it sound so easy
« Reply #200 on: November 13, 2015, 06:39:46 PM »
Just read through all the information you gave, and I'd like to point out that green poops are sometimes a sign of foremilk/hindmilk imbalance. If your baby is still getting them.

partgypsy

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Re: Babies... some people make it sound so easy
« Reply #201 on: November 13, 2015, 07:16:47 PM »
Sleeping - if friends say baby is sleeping through the night young, they are lying (or just not waking up).  That cast-iron fry pan (advice above) is a great idea.

LOL, this reminds me of a story my friend told me about a couple of our other buddies whose conversation he overheard.

Guy #1 (who is a doctor): So how are things going? Have you been getting any sleep?
Guy #2 (who just had his first daughter and is 2-3 weeks in): Things are GREAT! Lydia slept through the ENTIRE night last night!
Guy #1: WHAT? *befuddled look* That's not a good thing - you were supposed to wake her up and feed her!!!


hahahahahaha

Hilarious. When people asked my husband that, he would say, yeah I think she's been sleeping through the night. And I would have to tell him no, I got up to nurse every one of those nights, you just slept through it.

Tom Bri

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Re: Babies... some people make it sound so easy
« Reply #202 on: November 13, 2015, 10:15:10 PM »
Kids are so different. Both my daughters were poor feeders, breast or bottle, and my nephew easily drank twice as much as either. All three are turning out fine. My wife didn't have a lot of milk, so she supplemented with a bottle. She didn't like it and felt bad about it, but that's just the way it was. No moral failure involved.
As for post-partum depession! She was screaming bat-shit crazy for 9 months after both kids. It was hell. Then, she recovered. Wish we had had some support, but I knew nothing about it at the time and had nowhere to turn. Talk to a doctor!

purple monkey

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Re: Babies... some people make it sound so easy
« Reply #203 on: November 14, 2015, 05:03:13 PM »
Baby sucking makes milk.
More they suck, more milk comes.
Growth spurt is a common thing.  (suck more and you think not enough milk, but is fine).
Growth spurt happens at 3 weeks, 6 weeks, 3 months, 6 months.
Good luck.

Krnten

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Re: Babies... some people make it sound so easy
« Reply #204 on: November 14, 2015, 07:24:21 PM »
Just wanted to add my two cents to this: you guys have given it your all and your kid has probably gotten whatever benefit there is to breastfeeding already.  The guilt of quitting is horrible but I hope you just quit.

Formula is liberating.  It allows more people to feed and enjoy the baby.  The bonding is just as strong over a bottle, as you probably already know.  It's easy to do on the go and it frees you from the pump.  Pumping is awful and the time you spend doing it is time you could be cuddling your baby.

My first never latched, screamed at the breast from day 1, and I quit almost immediately and felt horrible, horrible about it.  I wasn't even that interested in breastfeeding in the first place, just thought I'd give it a shot. You can't help the guilt.

We just had a second and again I thought I'd give nursing a try.  Well what do you know, this one's latch was perfect and strong from the get go.  She seemed to prefer the breast.  I still quit, because I love the benefits of formula.  And felt horribly guilty again as my milk came in and the baby got less and less interested in nursing once she realized the bottle was easier. 

Your wife will feel guilty for quitting, but that guilt slowly goes away.  If you can just make the decision to do formula, all the stress will lift very soon and you can enjoy your baby more.  Nursing isn't worth it if it's this hard for you. 

purple monkey

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Re: Babies... some people make it sound so easy
« Reply #205 on: November 14, 2015, 07:51:47 PM »
Update to thread.
Just like you don't go to a consumer products Web site to ask advice on retiring, you should go to the experts on breastfeeding:
LLLI

Those women, yes, the mammals, the ones that are EXPERTS
on breastfeeding.

Just like a spendthrift can't help you with FIRE,
MMM folks can only give you their experience with breastfeeding, which is a man-focused, pro-formula, short-term solution.

Le Leche League

Good luck.

bdoubleu

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Re: Babies... some people make it sound so easy
« Reply #206 on: November 15, 2015, 09:05:04 PM »
Personally I would take a doctor's advice over that of Internet people.

Even the doctor was basically "I don't know if acid is really the issue or not... we can try Zantac just to take a stab at it" :X
This is really tough.  Obviously you don't want you kid in pain if he/she actually has GERD.  On the other hand, you really don't want to give your baby any unnecessary meds, especially one than can cause long term problems, like, for instance, as the NPR article posits, necessitating continued use of the drug.

I read a bit of the link you posted and it says zantac can make a baby sleepy!? That's nuts, I can see how babies that don't even have GERD would continue to use it and then subsequently need it.

Most babies, as the link you posted states, have "reflux" to some extent.  It's why most babies spit up.  As a nursing mom, I had oversupply, overactive letdown, and I thought nursing was the solution to ALL of my baby's problems.  Combine that with an over-eater, and DD1 was a spectacular vomiter.  I called my LLL leader a couple times late at night because of the amount and projectile nature of her "spit up."  But I never ended up with a GERD diagnosis, probably because even though I'm sure I told the doctor what we were seeing, I never said, hey,doc, could it be GERD?  (But our ped is not really rX happy, fortunately for us...)  I am very careful to only describe symptoms as they are to my doctor, I rarely suggest a diagnosis, since I'm an accountant, not a CPA.  Because I sometimes think doctors are just quick to agree and give you a prescription and get you out.  I once had a doc write my an rx for antibiotics for poison ivy.  I didn't fill that.

Try to pay attention to the times that the baby is fussy.  I have talked to moms who considered a GERD diagnosis, but after they realized that it was always between 6-10 pm that the baby was fussy, they reasoned that it wasn't GERD, GERD would probably be an issue all the time, not at the normal baby "witching hours."


I don't want to derail this thread, but the irony of your statement (bolded above) combined with the warning to the OP about the dangers of PPIs makes my head hurt (fyi - Zantac is an H2-blocker, a "safer" alternative mentioned in the NPR link you provided in a previous post - not a dangerous *sarcasm* PPI like Prevacid/Prilosec/etc).  You rarely suggest a diagnosis, but freely offer up information about medications to scare people (mild hyperbole)? And if Zantac causes baby to be sleepy, it's likely because baby is finally comfortable and can actually relax.  They do typically need to sleep most of the day, so if you're used to a baby not sleeping much (especially due to discomfort), and then they start sleeping a normal amount of time after starting a medication you are giving them to make them more comfortable, you could logically connect baby's comfort with baby's new ability to get some rest.  If you are still worried, you could also learn the mechanism of action of the medications, and discover that it doesn't cause sleepiness.

Until you actually have a baby who benefits from the use of acid reducing medications, it's difficult to understand.  OP's posts have stirred up horrible memories of my baby's first several weeks of trying/failing breastfeeding and trying 6 different types of formula before settling on one that baby would actually eat and not scream in pain on.  After 3 and a half long months, we have settled on a nice regimen of Zantac twice a day and Nutramigen formula ($$), but the fact that baby is not screaming every minute he's awake makes it so worth it.  We didn't take the easy route by any means, and unfortunately baby suffered because of it (for weeks we were sure it was colic, then sure we just had a fussy/crabby baby, etc.). If baby really has GERD, the constant spitting up of super acidic stomach contents can actually cause esophageal erosions, which could be a lifelong issue for your kid, just because you were afraid to try the medicine. If your baby really needs an acid reducer, you are doing much more harm to them by withholding the medication due to unwarranted fears.  And if you try it and it doesn't help anything, you can stop.

I wanted to breastfeed so bad, but the toll it took on my mental health and bonding experience with our baby was not worth it at all. Every feeding was traumatic for all of us (and with every 1-2 hour feedings as a newborn, that meant our household was in constant stress-mode). I was devastated when hubs suggested we switch to formula.  It's not always that baby gets the best nutrition, but also making sure baby is raised with one or two sane parents also plays an equal role in baby's wellbeing, in my biased opinion.  Soon he'll be eating "real" food anyway, and it won't matter what he ate the first year of his life.  We are all in a much better spot since switching to formula.  I still wish breastfeeding would have worked out, but I'm not going to beat myself up over it (anymore). :)

You really do have to do what works best for your family, and it will likely be different with each baby you (might) have. They are, after all, humans and they will all have their own unique personalities and temperaments.  Good luck to OP and others with parenting struggles :)

serpentstooth

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Re: Babies... some people make it sound so easy
« Reply #207 on: November 17, 2015, 10:47:27 AM »
Personally I would take a doctor's advice over that of Internet people.

Even the doctor was basically "I don't know if acid is really the issue or not... we can try Zantac just to take a stab at it" :X
This is really tough.  Obviously you don't want you kid in pain if he/she actually has GERD.  On the other hand, you really don't want to give your baby any unnecessary meds, especially one than can cause long term problems, like, for instance, as the NPR article posits, necessitating continued use of the drug.

I read a bit of the link you posted and it says zantac can make a baby sleepy!? That's nuts, I can see how babies that don't even have GERD would continue to use it and then subsequently need it.

Most babies, as the link you posted states, have "reflux" to some extent.  It's why most babies spit up.  As a nursing mom, I had oversupply, overactive letdown, and I thought nursing was the solution to ALL of my baby's problems.  Combine that with an over-eater, and DD1 was a spectacular vomiter.  I called my LLL leader a couple times late at night because of the amount and projectile nature of her "spit up."  But I never ended up with a GERD diagnosis, probably because even though I'm sure I told the doctor what we were seeing, I never said, hey,doc, could it be GERD?  (But our ped is not really rX happy, fortunately for us...)  I am very careful to only describe symptoms as they are to my doctor, I rarely suggest a diagnosis, since I'm an accountant, not a CPA.  Because I sometimes think doctors are just quick to agree and give you a prescription and get you out.  I once had a doc write my an rx for antibiotics for poison ivy.  I didn't fill that.

Try to pay attention to the times that the baby is fussy.  I have talked to moms who considered a GERD diagnosis, but after they realized that it was always between 6-10 pm that the baby was fussy, they reasoned that it wasn't GERD, GERD would probably be an issue all the time, not at the normal baby "witching hours."


I don't want to derail this thread, but the irony of your statement (bolded above) combined with the warning to the OP about the dangers of PPIs makes my head hurt (fyi - Zantac is an H2-blocker, a "safer" alternative mentioned in the NPR link you provided in a previous post - not a dangerous *sarcasm* PPI like Prevacid/Prilosec/etc).  You rarely suggest a diagnosis, but freely offer up information about medications to scare people (mild hyperbole)? And if Zantac causes baby to be sleepy, it's likely because baby is finally comfortable and can actually relax.  They do typically need to sleep most of the day, so if you're used to a baby not sleeping much (especially due to discomfort), and then they start sleeping a normal amount of time after starting a medication you are giving them to make them more comfortable, you could logically connect baby's comfort with baby's new ability to get some rest.  If you are still worried, you could also learn the mechanism of action of the medications, and discover that it doesn't cause sleepiness.

Until you actually have a baby who benefits from the use of acid reducing medications, it's difficult to understand.  OP's posts have stirred up horrible memories of my baby's first several weeks of trying/failing breastfeeding and trying 6 different types of formula before settling on one that baby would actually eat and not scream in pain on.  After 3 and a half long months, we have settled on a nice regimen of Zantac twice a day and Nutramigen formula ($$), but the fact that baby is not screaming every minute he's awake makes it so worth it.  We didn't take the easy route by any means, and unfortunately baby suffered because of it (for weeks we were sure it was colic, then sure we just had a fussy/crabby baby, etc.). If baby really has GERD, the constant spitting up of super acidic stomach contents can actually cause esophageal erosions, which could be a lifelong issue for your kid, just because you were afraid to try the medicine. If your baby really needs an acid reducer, you are doing much more harm to them by withholding the medication due to unwarranted fears.  And if you try it and it doesn't help anything, you can stop.

I wanted to breastfeed so bad, but the toll it took on my mental health and bonding experience with our baby was not worth it at all. Every feeding was traumatic for all of us (and with every 1-2 hour feedings as a newborn, that meant our household was in constant stress-mode). I was devastated when hubs suggested we switch to formula.  It's not always that baby gets the best nutrition, but also making sure baby is raised with one or two sane parents also plays an equal role in baby's wellbeing, in my biased opinion.  Soon he'll be eating "real" food anyway, and it won't matter what he ate the first year of his life.  We are all in a much better spot since switching to formula.  I still wish breastfeeding would have worked out, but I'm not going to beat myself up over it (anymore). :)

You really do have to do what works best for your family, and it will likely be different with each baby you (might) have. They are, after all, humans and they will all have their own unique personalities and temperaments.  Good luck to OP and others with parenting struggles :)

This. My daughter was pretty obviously suffering from GERD. She wasn't unhappy. She was screaming in obvious agony that would abate within 20 minutes of getting Zantac. She'd arch her back, turn red, sob until she gasped and scream until she retched. It cleared up a couple months ago and she STILL finds eating upsetting and tries to avoid it. Food and eating is a struggle for her now and may be long into the future, and I don't know how much of that is because for the first few months of her life, eating hurt. An adult can understand suffering through pain, an infant has no such intellectual capacity. I wasn't willing to make her infancy more stressful than it already was because of some relatively small risks associated with Zantac. There are risks associated with leaving a medical condition untreated as well.