Hello smart Mustachians! I recently came across a job posting that looked like it could be a dream job. Great, yes? Yes!
Backstory: I work in a small niche area in a relatively small market. I have been with my current employer for over 5 years. Boss loves me and I generally enjoy the work I do but I am ready for a change. In part because boss isn't the easiest person to work for (poor management and people skills, gossips about my co-workers in a way I find inappropriate, etc), and in part because it's just time (us lawyers don't like to get stale, you know). I have a lot of independence at work and that fact has made working there fairly bearable. But lately things have been getting under my skin so I sometimes engage in some casual job searching. Which is when I found a posting for a great job that would be a significant step up, in a related field but different enough to be different, and bonus!(?) new job is with a local university.
So here is the problem and the question. My boss knows everyone. I am afraid that simply applying for this job will get back to her. I think in the back of her mind I might take over the organization I currently work for when she retires and she is going to take this very personally. Second problem - the new job asks for references with the application. Since my current boss knows everyone and the new job is in our same general field, there is a 99% chance that she a. knows the person who is retiring thus opening up this positions, or b. knows someone who is going to be looking at my resume. It seems odd not to list my current boss as a reference, but I also don't want them to contact her unless we get to the point where the job is a real possibility. I could easily approach my second in command boss and list him as a reference instead, but I am not sure that wouldn't look weird.
TLDR: I want to apply for a new job but I am afraid of listing my current boss as a reference and I am afraid she will find out I am looking to leave before I have a back up plan.
Any wise words? I know someone here has dealt with something similar...